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Published: 2006-11-01 03:08:34 +0000 UTC; Views: 2086; Favourites: 6; Downloads: 19
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Off The Rack – A Halloween One-ShotAuthor: The Humbug
Disclaimer: “Kim Possible” and all characters within © The Walt Disney Company and its related entities. Kim Possible created by Mark McCorkle & Bob Schooley. All rights reserved. No profit is being collected from the fiction contained within. You can blame the rest of this on me.
Rating: PG-13 for intimations of a physical relationship between consenting adult females. If this will offend you, please read something else.
Summary: This is a Kim/Shego pairing fan fiction that can fall anywhere within my ‘Who’s Writing This Crap?’ Kigo-verse. Kasy Ann and Sheki Go Possible are the sole creations of NoDrogs (it is with great respect that I make mention of them). Warning: Reading this story may cause cavities!
Six months ago…
“This has got to be the most ridiculous thing that I have EVER seen!”
Kim Possible, semi-retired adventurer, world-saver and mother of two took one last look at the printed email and the copy of it’s image attachment and pushed it away from her and back across the table to her wife.
“Baby, isn’t it you that’s always telling me to lighten up and get over myself? This is a great idea and the girls can benefit from it!”
Shego, semi-reformed, former villain and occasional member of Team Possible retrieved the paper and held it up to the light for a better look.
“Did you even read what the contract said? They only want the rights to manufacture and sell these for one years in the United States with the option of another year overseas, with the reproduction rights to fully expire in no more than three years regardless, and ten percent of all proceeds will go right into the bank for our girls college fund!”
“And have you looked at the picture? The red wig looks like crepe paper and a child could trip over the baggy legs of the mock-cargo pants! The green and black one looks a little better, but there are tufts of green tinsel sprouting from the wrists… what is that supposed to be, plasma?”
Kim got up from the table, shaking her head, collected the dinner dishes and began to wipe the faces of her twin daughters, Kasy and Sheki. Her wife took this activity as a sign that her spouse was hoping to avoid further discussion so she also stood and assisted with the task, mostly so they could get it over with and return to the issue at hand.
“Kimmie, they just want to prove that they can make a child’s Halloween costume that is totally flame retardant, contains absolutely no toxins or other potentially dangerous substances, doesn’t cause pollutants when fabricated, is good for the environment when disposed of, and presents no potential choking hazards when worn.”
Shego looked down at their daughters; Kim’s by virtue of having given birth to them and Shego’s by virtue of having contributed half of the genetic material that gave them life. Each of the tiny miracles was watching their Momma and Mommy carefully so the ‘argument’ was severely reserved.
The tall and pale woman with the greenish cast to her skin bent down and kissed the little girls on the forehead, their own skin identical to that of Shego. There were differences between the toddlers, however; Sheki Go Possible shared her Momma’s black hair with green highlights and Kasy Ann Possible had bright red hair like her Mommy.
“They just want to make a buck!”
“Yes, Princess, but not from us! They want our permission for the use of our likenesses ONLY to get noticed on the global stage! After that, the ‘KimShego’ run is ended and they start making something else! It’s a brand new company that just wants a chance to get started and we can help them! They need permission from us right away if they’re going to have the time they need to get ready for Halloween this year.”
Kim was turned away from the rest of her family and focused on her work at the kitchen sink; after several seconds with no further retorts Shego felt as if the scales had finally tipped in her direction.
“Pumpkin, I checked these people out and even Wade checked them out; there’re totally legit! We both have to agree and sign the contract for it to be legal.”
Shego leaned down again and got her daughters’ attentions. She made a ‘pout’ face and pointed towards their Mommy, who still had her back turned. Kim washed the soap suds from her hands and prepared to make one final protest, but when she turned back to face them she was struck with three ‘puppy dog pouts’, one each from her own precious children and one from Shego, who even managed to squeeze out a tear.
The redhead quickly turned away again lest she become permanently damaged.
“You are evil…”
“Yeah, ain’t I something?”
Kim sighed and left the sink, returning to the table but with her eyes downcast so as to avoid further ‘pout’ fallout. She accepted the proffered pen from her spouse and signed her name to the printed contract, with Shego signing her legally recognized moniker, make legal with the help of Global Justice, and sealed the document in an express envelope for mailing first thing the next morning.
There was no further discussion of the matter that evening, not through playtime or movie time or bedtime or playtime for the adults. Kim’s last word on the subject was truly her last for several months.
She snuggled next to her lover and held the pale body tight against her.
“I just hope that you’re right about this.”
The former thief returned the embrace and kissed the slender young woman fiercely.
“I am, trust me.”
“Right, and the checks in the mail.”
“Yep, and I won’t co…”
“SHEGO!”
Six month later, on October 31st…
“This has got to be the most ridiculous thing that I have EVER seen!”
“Oh, I just wish that I could replay all of your arguments from that night, I really do!” Kim giggled and risked a brief glance in the rearview mirror of her car to take yet another look at their children.
It was Halloween night and both Kim and Shego were taking their daughters to the street where Kim’s parents lived for some early evening ‘Trick or Treating’ and then a Halloween party at the house for both the children and the adults.
“Yeah, well… you didn’t have to actually go out and BUY a set for them you know!”
“And why not? They look adorable!” She laughed again.
“I guess…”
Shego turned around in her seat and inspected her little girls and two perfect little faces grinned back at her.
“Momma, look at me! I’m ‘Kim Possible’!”
“Yeah, and I’m ‘Shego’!”
The pale woman’s heart melted… slightly. She smiled at her darlings and turned back to sulk in the passenger seat. Kim didn’t fail to notice the scowl still on her wife’s face.
“Oh, come on, they don’t even really know who ‘they’ are! They just know about the costumes from the commercials and that some of their friends were getting them also. If they figure out that they’re actually dressing up as their own mothers, well, so be it. Otherwise, they’re just a couple of kids having fun on Halloween!”
“That’s not what I’m steamed about and you know it!”
“Yeah, ain’t I something?”
The car pulled into the wide gravel driveway of the Possible residence and Shego helped free the girls from their car seats. Kim had to dive out of the way as the two little girls beat a path straight to the front door and took turns ringing the bell. The exterior lights were already on in welcome to other neighborhood children, and Dr. Mrs. Possible quickly opened the door.
“Oh my goodness! JOHN, please hurry out here and bring the camera!” She turned back to her beautiful granddaughters.
“TRICK OR TREAT, GRAMMA!”
“Aren’t you just the cutest things?” Anne gave them each an apple. John was soon at her side with the camera.
“Great Caesar’s ghost! Who has a kiss for Grandpa?”
“I DO! I DO!” The tall man knelt down and they each gave him a huge kiss while he secretly put something in their bags with the apple from their Grandma. Then he stood back up and prepared to take a picture of the little girls just as Kim and Shego ambled up to the front porch.
Kasy Ann Possible’s bright red hair was mostly hidden by the long flowing black wig sitting askew on her head, while her comfortable green and black battle uniform sprouted it’s crinkly tinsel ‘plasma’ at her wrists. Her sister Sheki let the loose fitting cargo pants rest in her tiny hips while the black top exposed several inches of pale green belly, with the crepe paper ‘hair’ not quite able to fully cover all of her own black tresses.
The picture was taken and the scene recorded for posterity. As the family entered the house, Shego motioned to John and pulled him aside for a question.
“What was that I saw you slip into their candy sacks?”
“Oh, nothing much… just a packet of ‘Sugar Frosted Chocolate Energy Balls’.”
“Dr. Mr. P, you are evil!”
“Yeah, ain’t I something?”
Later that night…
“You are kinky… but I approve. I never realized that they had planned to offer these things in adult sizes.” Kim raised her hand to scratch at her hairline where the black wig rested on her head. “This thing itches but I do like the outfit; it looks really slinky!”
Shego had to agree and loved how Kim’s subtle curves were accentuated by the form-fitting green and black costume, even while her own were somewhat subdued under the baggy cargo pants.
“Hey, too each their own, Pumpkin. Grown-ups like to have fun too.” Shego wasn’t quite as pleased with her outfit; in addition to the loose pants, her wig also itched slightly. One benefit was that the crop-top did expose more of her stomach for the forthcoming ministrations of her amorous wife.
The taller woman faced the younger woman from across the large bed.
“Ok, ‘Shego’ prepare to be spanked by the velvet glove of justice!”
Kim had never participated in anything more ridiculous in her life, and she loved every minute of it.
“Bring it on, ‘Princess’… bring it on!”
The Ever-Loving, Ever-Living End!
Author’s Note: Inspired by the season, even if a little bit last-minute; also a big tip of the hat to Littledigits for www.deviantart.com/deviation/32956358/ and HazuraSinner for www.deviantart.com/deviation/3… , two excellent pictures at DeviantArt that gave me this idea this afternoon!
Comments: 5
humbugmst3k In reply to demondragon6 [2006-11-18 04:05:39 +0000 UTC]
You are too kind to an errant Hack! Tell you what; please read 'Deep Down - Alpha & Omega' and then tell me what you think. THAT was my FIRST KimShego fanfic written just in the Spring of 2006.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
demondragon6 In reply to humbugmst3k [2006-11-18 17:52:43 +0000 UTC]
Will do, but seriously your writing is great, you are very descriptive and your writing is full of personality and humor! It's the kind of stuff everyone loves!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
humbugmst3k [2006-11-01 06:08:32 +0000 UTC]
Thanx for the Comment! I'm all about the 'WAFF'.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
epyonavenger [2006-11-01 05:44:09 +0000 UTC]
:cheers!: Very enjoyable! :laughs: It was funny though, right at the beginning I just knew it was going to have a point were Kim and Shego wore each other's costumes. Blame Rinacat's pic for that. XD
Anyway, highly entertaining! So far no cavities, but I'm pretty resistant to WAFF-induced troubles. ^_~
👍: 0 ⏩: 0