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Published: 2015-03-19 02:15:14 +0000 UTC; Views: 232; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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Ok, so, earlier on Facebook I shared a post that I myself found quite inspiring. Take this how you will, but it was a girl who decided to share a picture of herself, saying that he had managed to get over her anxiety and her fear of how she looks in a swim suit, even with cuts and scars all over her, and went to the beach for the first time since she was a little girl.I shared the picture because I believe that no matter how bad people get, there is still hope for them. If they are trying to push past the fear and the anxiety and the hurt that they have given to themselves because of what other people have said, then yeah, I find it inspiring.
No, this doesn't mean I commend her at all for cutting, and I myself wouldn't upload something like this, because to people who don't understand that type of thing it might seem like an attempt to get attention. But, and I mean this the best way I can, the only way someone would do it for attention, is if they were that vein that they think the only way to get attention is by hurting yourself, cutting into your own flesh and drawing blood. Ok, everyone who does it, has to go through the pain that they've received from other people, all over again because they do it to themselves.
No, I do not agree with cutting at all, and yes I know I've had my share of it in the past, does that mean I think people should do it? No! Fuck no, I do my best to stop the people around me, whether I like them or not, from even thinking about doing it, I try my hardest to make people happy so that they won't have to go through the pain I've gone through.
And another thing people have been saying, the fact that these people have done it to themselves. Yes they have, but does that mean they're entirely to blame? Fuck no! Its the dicks that call them fat, call them worthless, tell them they should go kill themselves, that make them and convince them to think that way about themselves. I don't commend her for posting what she posted, but I believe from what she's said that she took a big step to overcoming something that she found difficult, screw what everyone else thinks. If she can overcome something challenging to her, good for her. Obviously, from the picture, most of her wounds are still fresh. So, yes, from most peoples perspective she isn't trying hard enough. But to me, I understand the struggle of trying to stop once you've started. The only thing that's helped me through it is having someone worth stopping for. Someone to confide in when I'm feeling low or down, someone I know will bring me back up to my usual self. And that is what I try and do for others.
And everyone saying 'she's done it to herself, she disserved whatever she did because she chose to do it'. Yes I can't explain why as humans we have the urge to hurt ourselves when he get hurt by others. Maybe its to feel in control of the pain, maybe its to numb the pain that others have given us to mask it behind scars. Whatever the case, it isn't just us who do it to ourselves. Maybe every time she's put the knife to herself she's thought about cutting too deep that she doesn't survive from it. And that, is in no way, entirely her fault. I admit, to us who have cut or hurt ourselves, yes, we did do it to ourselves. But only because we were driven to that point by other people, that twisted our image with their words to the point where we started to believe what other people were saying about us.
And all these people saying 'if you don't like the way you look then change it'. Most people do like the way they look, or are at least comfortable with the way they look, UNTIL people start insulting them for their thighs being too large or being chubby, or having a weird hair cut.
Human being are a disgrace, they absolutely disgust me. And yes I am fully aware that I am one, and I disgust myself. But, if you're saying 'if you don't like who you are then change', then surely everyone would be the same because the only reason why people don't like, or why people hide who they are, is because sad idiots think its funny to make fun of them for who they are or how they look. At the end of the day, changing the way you look will result in you changing your weight, which means exercising harder, eating differently or in some cases not at all, it involves mentally and physically trying to be someone that you don't want to be.
Some people fucking let things get to them alright, and I will argue and argue about this point because this is where I draw the line.
People shouldn't have to change who they are to be happy.
Other people should learn not to be dickheads, and to stop being so insecure with who THEY are, and may then they wouldn't take it out on other people, who then go and take it out on themselves. Its a full, vicious circle, and instead of telling people that they should stop cutting themselves because they only have themselves to blame, maybe people should try telling the people who call them names and judge them based on how they look, to knock it off, to stop being so immature and to realise that what they are saying to the person, that they could be killing someone eventually. And no, I don't just mean suicide. I mean slowly killing who that person is. Making them into someone they're not.
An outspoken, kind heart could go to a timid, quiet little person in a matter of weeks because of bullies. And that makes me so angry. That people change who they are because of what other people say. But you can't just judge people who cut, based on the fact that they've hurt themselves. Because at the end of the day, isn't hurting yourself another form of changing who you are? Is it not changing your body? Is it not scaring yourself?
No. I do not condone anyone to hurt themselves. If possible I would do ANYTHING to bring back the people who have been driven to the point of suicide, or to go and stop people who are thinking of cutting, or any form of harm towards themselves. But I can't, because it is up to that person.
And yes, I know they havnt been driven to that point purely by other people. They have driven themselves to that point by listening to those other people, and it is hard not to when multiple people are telling you every day, the things that are wrong with your physical appearance. And I in no way think that suicide is ever a good option, there are other options besides hurting yourself, or killing yourself, but some people are just driven to the point of that and it isn't fun. It isn't pretty. And people who do it, are not as people have said 'blaming everything on other people and not fixing the problem.' To them the fucking problem is themselves, to them they are taking out their anger or sadness on their own flesh because they blame themselves for what people are saying.
I know, most of what I'm saying probably won't make much sense, but at the moment, at 2:00 in the morning, I really do not care.
I do not wish for anyone to ever hurt themselves in any way, but if I see someone attempting to at least make a start on a recovery, then I will respect that. Instead of throwing it all over the internet that that person only has themselves to blame. The reason why they're in that mess in the first place is because they only blamed themselves.
And I'm speaking as someone who has been through so much of this that I will argue with anyone who stands against it until the day that I die.
People can get better. And putting them down even more for trying to be brave will just make it worse.
This girl was so fucking brave to upload what she did for the world to see. That is my view on it.
I know others view it differently, even people who have hurt themselves. But surely by saying things like 'she's obviously doing it for attention, I do it but I would never tell anybody' is just begging for attention yourself? If you think of it the way you thought of this girl?
This is just my view. I know other people will have different views, and will see these types of things differently, but to me. I think this girl is brave. And as long as she is trying to make a difference to her own life, by attempting to stop hurting herself, by attempting to get her life back on track and get past all the judgemental bastards that are out there, then I will support her. Because I am also trying to do the same thing.
Once again, I will say, I do not commend the act of hurting yourself in any way. There are always better things to do than that. And for anyone who is going through anything like that and is thinking of doing something to yourself... If you somehow read this, just stop for a moment. Think, if some random girl on the internet who loves foxes and writing, can believe in you, and loves you for who you are without ever having met you, then you can believe in yourself enough to not do that to yourself, and not put yourself, based around what other people and you have told yourself, in that position.
I don't think hurting yourself is something to be proud of.
Its moving past the hurt and learning to live your life again that I think is something to be proud of.
Being who you are, and pushing past the judgement that has been made to you by people that don't even take the time to get to know who you are... That's something to be proud of.
I just hope that everyone will somehow see this from my perspective... To most people, it will seem like I'm saying that cutting is a good thing. I think the opposite.
And just like with smoking, alcohol, drugs, it is an addiction that is hard to break. But if someone is attempting to break it, or attempting to quit. Then I will support them.
I hope those of you who have or are thinking about starting never do... It would be a waste to kill the person you are, and replace them with a shadow of someone you're not...
Just think about that...
-Exza~ x
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Comments: 8
imthederpyfox In reply to Missy37 [2015-07-13 15:32:02 +0000 UTC]
I was very angry when I wrote this :') and its still something that annoys me
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
imthederpyfox In reply to Missy37 [2015-07-13 18:51:29 +0000 UTC]
Just something I'm passionate about I guess
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Missy37 In reply to imthederpyfox [2015-07-13 19:59:11 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, everyone always has something that tears their guts apart and lights their emotions on fire, it's totally fine by me.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
imthederpyfox In reply to Missy37 [2015-07-13 20:57:21 +0000 UTC]
I tend to do that a lot with a lot of things really :') oh well
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Missy37 In reply to imthederpyfox [2015-07-14 05:44:20 +0000 UTC]
It's okay, I do it to... Everyone does.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1