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so I got bored and had my friend do this
this is homestuck according to Treefelow
This is EXACTLY what he said:
ARADIA: She has no eyes... I think she's blind. Of course she's blind. And... does she have holes in her pants? Oh, skirt. Okay. She looks like someone I could never relate to in my life.
TAVROS: He's in a wheelchair. He looks like the longhorns mascot a little bit. He's got horns coming out of his head that are just freakin huge. Where did he get that haricut? His style really doesn't fit being in a wheelchair.
SOLLUX: Is this person trying to watch a 3d movie? Is it a he or a she? He seems to have problems... with just everyday things. You can see that in his shoes. One of them's black and one of them's white. And he's wearing different colored glasses
KARKAT: He's stoned out of his mind and he's like my friend who laughs at 69 jokes he kinda looks like he could go super saiyan any moment now
Nepeta: It's a cute neko. What more is there to say?
Kanaya: Wha... Stop this doesn't make any sense! What is this? That hair does this pointy thing sticking up, looks almost like the cloak of a vampire. I honestly have no clue. What this is. That I'm looking at. Show style drama queen thingy.
Terezi: He enjoys life in general. He doesn't have a f*** to give. at all.
Vriska: She kinda looks like smoeone that I would really be into. Like the missing lens in her glasses? But yes, the big poofy fluffy hair. I can relate to this person.
Equius: Hehehe Is he crying? It's his eyes? First of all he's wearing a tank top/muscle shirt. First of all what's up with his hair, one of his horns is missing dunno what happened there, i feel bad for him he cant be horny anymore. I dunno. Is he... he's like the douchebag guy. He looks like a douchebag with a jersey accent
Gamzee: Next one's the Joker.
Eridan: Is he like.. a sea troll is what it looks like. And he wants to be very intelligent but yet at the same time not so intelligent. If that makes sense to you. Like he's the evil villain that tries to be an evil villain but doesn't succeed in it because he always has a flaw in his plan.
Feferi: What is this? Would Pinkie Pie be a good description? She looks bubbly. Yes, she looks bubbly.

JOHN: JOHN EGGMAN. IS IT? IS THAT JOHN EGGMAN. FIRST OF ALL WHAT ID LIKE TO SAY ABOUT DR JOHN EGGMAN FREEMAN THE EIGHT I THINK HES HONESTLY A GREAT GUY WHO COULD RUN FOR PRESIDENT AND MAKE GOD MAD AT HIM
Rose: She's staring into my soul. She's the only one accomplishing it.
Dave: He's a f***in DJ. He's got a record on his shirt. He's like I don't care at all.
JADE: She's like... hm... HMM... She has a lisp. Definitely has a lisp. She seems like a fun person I suppose? Like... How should I describe this... I'm not sure how I should describe this.

LIL CAL: OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL WHAT IS THIS. WHAT? WHY WOULD YOU SKIP SUCH AN AMAZING CREATION AS THIS HE HAS A BOWTIE HE LOOKS LIKE A RAPPER HES GOT HIS SHADES AND GOLD MAN HE JUST SWAGGIN ALL OVER THE PLACE
Mayor WV: He's a mayor? What, Mayor of the sandpeople?
PM: He reminds me of a Homestar Runner character. Just a little bit, just style. Is he a police officer? She? I said it at the same time, she's a mail lady. My question is how you deliver mail without hands. She seems happy.
AR: His head's shaped kind of like an onion. He's obviously the most trustworthy person in the world and would never kill me, I can tell by the caution tape. Sarcasm.

WQ: So uh... hold on... is that like 19... 80s would you say? Looks like homestuck went thorugh a phase where he decided to start designing clothes. she looks like a model and that's her personality.
Jack: He just shouldn't be alive he's got a knife through the chest. Tell you where those wings aren't lifting him. Is he a fox or... he's a dog? Can we ask how this happened?
CDroll: Oh god. I don't know what I'm looking at. He's very powerful. And has tentaclescoming out of the top of it. I'm not quite sure what to say about it. Just look at it! That's all you can do.

Scratch: I love his bow tie. He's got a stag suit... where's his face? Why does he have no face? Um... is he like... He looks like a james bond kinda secret agent guy. He also looks like one of those things in a theme park where you put your head through a hole.
Snowman: It looks like... I have one phrase. Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? All I'm gonna say about that one.
BRO Strider: He's like the white guy who tries to use kung fu but doesnt actually know it. A poser?

Hussie: He... He looks sad. He looks like a gamer almost with that shirt. He looks like someone who would play Call of Duty. He's a CoDfag. I don't like CoDfags.
Dad: He's a businessman. he goes to a bus station gets on a bus and sits on a cubicle.
Mom: How much sass does this next person have? Cause she looks pretty sassy. She's like a gogo girl i guess? The martini doesn't help that at all either. She looks like she likes french style. Are they married?
Becquerel: It's a dog. It's... It's a dog.

Grandpa Harley: Oh my god... Okay, first of all the handlebar moustache is glorious. He's one of those guys who paocches animals I would say. He's got a british accent and would be the person who would release someone in the wild to hunt him down.
Maplehoof: APPLE BLOOM. BIG BOW = APPLE BLOOM HART = LUV
Casey: This is the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my life. It's like a salamander thing. And he could be ruler of the world. Just wait. He will be the ruler of the world one day.
Sassacre: Einstein at a frat party. This is why we have nuclear bombs people.

Nannasprite: Who is this? First of all, who you gonna call? GHOSTBUSTERS. Exactly. They look like ghosts to me, yes. The first lady looks like an old woman who lives down the road. And she buys hats from Rarity or something.
Jaspersprite: The next one's a really fancy cat honestly. Kind weird. Um... He's from like a casino... He kinda looks like a blackjack dealer with that vest.
Davesprite: HEHEHEIAHJEJSDIAGIJSDIDFJ. WHAT? He looks like he was gonna go save someone and he just got stabbed in the gut. He is definitely a failed hero.
Jadesprite: Did the dog die and accidently morph to the spirit of that other thing up here? Remember that chick who I was saying had a lisp? They both died and ran into each other. Congratulations you have that.

NAKODILE: ITS THE SALAMANDERS ARCH ENEMY DOCTOR ALLIGATORPANTS HES OUT TO KILL THE SALAMANDER AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD BY HIMSELF JUST LOOK AT IT HES GOT THE FACE OF EVIL YOU KNWO HES PLOTTING TO DESTROY EVERYONE IN THE WORLD. Nak? That kinda makes me think of gak.

HB: This guy is like... he's the assistant to a detective. Sure he has a serious face on right now but he's just fat and eats donuts all day. He thinks he's all that but he's not he's a douchebag. His face is so small. I thought of "henchman."
DD: Did you ever play LA Noire? This guy looks like a detective from the 50s? I think? He looks like an old detective form LA Noire. You could see him staring out a window.

Mutie: A cat? It's... a cat... It's also staring into my soul. But that's not the point. It's adorable. It is.. hte sidekick of the evil enemy doctor alligator pants they are both trying to stop the salamander form becoming waweosme president superhero of the world. it also rides in a giant mexican suit stomping everywhere. Spidercat because eye

Description
so I got bored and had my friend do this
this is homestuck according to Treefelow
This is EXACTLY what he said:
ARADIA: She has no eyes... I think she's blind. Of course she's blind. And... does she have holes in her pants? Oh, skirt. Okay. She looks like someone I could never relate to in my life.
TAVROS: He's in a wheelchair. He looks like the longhorns mascot a little bit. He's got horns coming out of his head that are just freakin huge. Where did he get that haricut? His style really doesn't fit being in a wheelchair.
SOLLUX: Is this person trying to watch a 3d movie? Is it a he or a she? He seems to have problems... with just everyday things. You can see that in his shoes. One of them's black and one of them's white. And he's wearing different colored glasses
KARKAT: He's stoned out of his mind and he's like my friend who laughs at 69 jokes he kinda looks like he could go super saiyan any moment now
Nepeta: It's a cute neko. What more is there to say?
Kanaya: Wha... Stop this doesn't make any sense! What is this? That hair does this pointy thing sticking up, looks almost like the cloak of a vampire. I honestly have no clue. What this is. That I'm looking at. Show style drama queen thingy.
Terezi: He enjoys life in general. He doesn't have a f*** to give. at all.
Vriska: She kinda looks like smoeone that I would really be into. Like the missing lens in her glasses? But yes, the big poofy fluffy hair. I can relate to this person.
Equius: Hehehe Is he crying? It's his eyes? First of all he's wearing a tank top/muscle shirt. First of all what's up with his hair, one of his horns is missing dunno what happened there, i feel bad for him he cant be horny anymore. I dunno. Is he... he's like the douchebag guy. He looks like a douchebag with a jersey accent
Gamzee: Next one's the Joker.
Eridan: Is he like.. a sea troll is what it looks like. And he wants to be very intelligent but yet at the same time not so intelligent. If that makes sense to you. Like he's the evil villain that tries to be an evil villain but doesn't succeed in it because he always has a flaw in his plan.
Feferi: What is this? Would Pinkie Pie be a good description? She looks bubbly. Yes, she looks bubbly.

JOHN: JOHN EGGMAN. IS IT? IS THAT JOHN EGGMAN. FIRST OF ALL WHAT ID LIKE TO SAY ABOUT DR JOHN EGGMAN FREEMAN THE EIGHT I THINK HES HONESTLY A GREAT GUY WHO COULD RUN FOR PRESIDENT AND MAKE GOD MAD AT HIM
Rose: She's staring into my soul. She's the only one accomplishing it.
Dave: He's a f***in DJ. He's got a record on his shirt. He's like I don't care at all.
JADE: She's like... hm... HMM... She has a lisp. Definitely has a lisp. She seems like a fun person I suppose? Like... How should I describe this... I'm not sure how I should describe this.

LIL CAL: OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL WHAT IS THIS. WHAT? WHY WOULD YOU SKIP SUCH AN AMAZING CREATION AS THIS HE HAS A BOWTIE HE LOOKS LIKE A RAPPER HES GOT HIS SHADES AND GOLD MAN HE JUST SWAGGIN ALL OVER THE PLACE
Mayor WV: He's a mayor? What, Mayor of the sandpeople?
PM: He reminds me of a Homestar Runner character. Just a little bit, just style. Is he a police officer? She? I said it at the same time, she's a mail lady. My question is how you deliver mail without hands. She seems happy.
AR: His head's shaped kind of like an onion. He's obviously the most trustworthy person in the world and would never kill me, I can tell by the caution tape. Sarcasm.

WQ: So uh... hold on... is that like 19... 80s would you say? Looks like homestuck went thorugh a phase where he decided to start designing clothes. she looks like a model and that's her personality.
Jack: He just shouldn't be alive he's got a knife through the chest. Tell you where those wings aren't lifting him. Is he a fox or... he's a dog? Can we ask how this happened?
CDroll: Oh god. I don't know what I'm looking at. He's very powerful. And has tentaclescoming out of the top of it. I'm not quite sure what to say about it. Just look at it! That's all you can do.

Scratch: I love his bow tie. He's got a stag suit... where's his face? Why does he have no face? Um... is he like... He looks like a james bond kinda secret agent guy. He also looks like one of those things in a theme park where you put your head through a hole.
Snowman: It looks like... I have one phrase. Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? All I'm gonna say about that one.
BRO Strider: He's like the white guy who tries to use kung fu but doesnt actually know it. A poser?

Hussie: He... He looks sad. He looks like a gamer almost with that shirt. He looks like someone who would play Call of Duty. He's a CoDfag. I don't like CoDfags.
Dad: He's a businessman. he goes to a bus station gets on a bus and sits on a cubicle.
Mom: How much sass does this next person have? Cause she looks pretty sassy. She's like a gogo girl i guess? The martini doesn't help that at all either. She looks like she likes french style. Are they married?
Becquerel: It's a dog. It's... It's a dog.

Grandpa Harley: Oh my god... Okay, first of all the handlebar moustache is glorious. He's one of those guys who paocches animals I would say. He's got a british accent and would be the person who would release someone in the wild to hunt him down.
Maplehoof: APPLE BLOOM. BIG BOW = APPLE BLOOM HART = LUV
Casey: This is the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my life. It's like a salamander thing. And he could be ruler of the world. Just wait. He will be the ruler of the world one day.
Sassacre: Einstein at a frat party. This is why we have nuclear bombs people.

Nannasprite: Who is this? First of all, who you gonna call? GHOSTBUSTERS. Exactly. They look like ghosts to me, yes. The first lady looks like an old woman who lives down the road. And she buys hats from Rarity or something.
Jaspersprite: The next one's a really fancy cat honestly. Kind weird. Um... He's from like a casino... He kinda looks like a blackjack dealer with that vest.
Davesprite: HEHEHEIAHJEJSDIAGIJSDIDFJ. WHAT? He looks like he was gonna go save someone and he just got stabbed in the gut. He is definitely a failed hero.
Jadesprite: Did the dog die and accidently morph to the spirit of that other thing up here? Remember that chick who I was saying had a lisp? They both died and ran into each other. Congratulations you have that.

NAKODILE: ITS THE SALAMANDERS ARCH ENEMY DOCTOR ALLIGATORPANTS HES OUT TO KILL THE SALAMANDER AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD BY HIMSELF JUST LOOK AT IT HES GOT THE FACE OF EVIL YOU KNWO HES PLOTTING TO DESTROY EVERYONE IN THE WORLD. Nak? That kinda makes me think of gak.

HB: This guy is like... he's the assistant to a detective. Sure he has a serious face on right now but he's just fat and eats donuts all day. He thinks he's all that but he's not he's a douchebag. His face is so small. I thought of "henchman."
DD: Did you ever play LA Noire? This guy looks like a detective from the 50s? I think? He looks like an old detective form LA Noire. You could see him staring out a window.

Mutie: A cat? It's... a cat... It's also staring into my soul. But that's not the point. It's adorable. It is.. hte sidekick of the evil enemy doctor alligator pants they are both trying to stop the salamander form becoming waweosme president superhero of the world. it also rides in a giant mexican suit stomping everywhere. Spidercat because eye