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John made sure to double check the three duffle bags that were laid down on the motel bed, he nodded to himself finding them adequately packed and ready for tonight's hunt. A Foeda Demon had been slaughtering campers and hikers killing them without thought or mercy.
These creatures were horrible bastards and tricky to kill though it only took a silver bullet to the hard or beheading them it was the getting close enough without getting yourself killed in the process that was the hard part. They were fast and having both claws and horns didn’t help with the matter.
Outside the motel room John could hear the muffled conversation of his eldest son Dean and his youngest (First). Since Sam had left for college completely abandoning his family, he’d come down hard on his daughter. Increasing her training time there was no way in hell he wouldn’t have any liabilities.
(First) was much like her older brothers, brave like Dean and smart like Sam but she brought her own characteristics along the way. She had a strong air of determination that was around her and an analytical brain that could analyse any situation quickly to find both problems and solutions. Despite her talents in John’s opinion there was nothing special about her hunting skills.
Both Sam and Dean had stopped John from training her as vigorously as he did with them but now Sam was gone and Dean couldn’t fight against his father's orders any longer now he didn’t have the backup from Sammy.
‘’Get yourself ready we leave in ten minutes to be Caleb.’’
‘’Yes sir.’’ Came a simultaneous response, John nodded and packed the duffles into the truck on the Impala. In ten minutes the Winchester trio was in the car. (First) was sat with a flashlight in between her lips as she read over the research she’d done.
‘’Everything fine back there, kiddo?’’ Dean asked, ‘’Fine, just checking over everything.’’
‘’You’ve reread over them at least ten times, chill everything will be fine.’’ (First) rolled her eyes causing Dean to smirk playfully. ‘’Can never be too careful, Dean.’’
‘’You better hope that information is correct.’’ Came John’s stern reply eyes glaring through the wing mirror. (First) bit the inside of her cheek to stop a sarcastic remark from pouring out of her mouth. ‘’Feoda Demons known for the vile smell of death and decay that follows them, prowl on the weak and the vulnerable as easy prey.’’ She spoke smoothly, turning over the page.
‘’Incredibly fast and powerful they originate from old latin folklore, it’s said that they are demonically possessed animals that mutate the more human flesh they devour.’’
‘’How do you kill it?’’
‘’Silver bullet to the heart or beheading, to keep them at bay they have a pure hatred of both fire and water.’’ She relaxed once she saw her dad nod his head. Since Sammy had left for college her father had changed his whole attitude towards her, he was now more distant and cold. Something she wasn’t used to, her heart ache for the man her father once was, she understood the need for the training but what she couldn’t understand was the distance he had put between them.
(First) did everything she could to gain his approval once more, she threw herself into training and research but it never seemed to be good enough. Dean had always been her crutch to lean on, hell, he practically raised the girl but now she needed him more than ever. The window next to her was rattled by someone pounding on it causing her to jump out of her skin. She scowled her hand reaching for the hunting knife she had tucked away in the waistband of her jeans only to smile with she saw Caleb's face pressed up to the window. ‘’God Caleb, you scared the crap outta me!’’
‘’A good hunter is always prepared.’’ John muttered under his breath but his comment didn’t go unnoticed by either of his kids. Dean offered his younger sister a smile which wasn’t returned causing him to swallow, he hated that the carefree child that he raised had been reduced to nothing and he couldn’t do anything about it.
Dean had watch his sisters ever lasting struggle for their father's approval something that he already had but nothing seemed to melt the ice around John’s heart instead he had started to make his intelligent and headstrong daughter start to doubt and second guess herself.
‘’You ready, kiddo?’’ She gave him a curt nod and climbed out, Caleb instantly pulled Dean in for a hug the pair of them clapping each other on the shoulder before he turned his attention to the younger Winchester. ‘’Well look at you all grown up, tell you something John you need to lock this one up from the boys.’’ He winked playfully. John on the other hand ignored the comment and just tossed out the duffle bags. ‘’Keep sharp, it’ll be daylight in a couple of hours.’’
The forest was cold, snow had slowly started to make its way down from the frigid sky making visibility poor but that wouldn’t stop the group of hunters, equipped with weapons, thick coats, gloves and scarves they made their way through. The forest was primordial. Centuries-old trees with sprawling limbs guarded the darkness, blotting out any sunlight. Bark mottled and splotched clumps of wet moss dangled from their rotten boughs now frozen from the harsh weather. A pungent tang oozed from every sentient being in the forest. Bewailing sounds ghosted through the trees from the ones that had found themselves hunted. It was truly a place to make your veins freeze over.
(First) blew out a breath watching as the cloud dissipated around her, narrowing her eyes she looked around trying to pinpoint what ever it was that was staring at her. She withdrew her hunting knife and marked a tree with an arrow pointing north, the direction they were heading in. It was a tactic that she’d come up with after getting lost in a forest just like this just shy of a year ago. The punishment John has given her was one she would never forget. It was silence bar from the sounds of their footsteps as they made their way through.
Something wasn’t right.
‘’Dad.’’ She whispered, ‘’Dad, something isn’t right.’’
‘’Shut up.’’ John hissed, ‘’Do you want to get us all killed?’’
‘’No -’’
‘’Enough! If you want to get yourself killed go ahead but don’t you think for one second that you’ll be dragging the rest of us down with you, now grow the fuck up. Do you see Dean panicking? No.’’ With that John stormed off ahead.
Even Caleb stared wide eyed at John’s outburst at his youngest, in his past experiences of working with the elder Winchester he was a man that would do anything to protect his kids even if it meant risking his life in the process. He’d always speak highly of them, so to hear him angrily tell his daughter that if she wanted to get herself killed was A-okay with him was shocking.
John pushed forward ignoring the warning from his daughter who was frantically telling him that something was wrong. The more she spoke the more angry he became. ‘’If I knew you were going to act like a scared little girl that I wouldn’t of brought you on this hunt.’’
Dean jumped into to intervene, ‘’Dad -’’
‘’Shut up boy!’’ John snarled, ‘’Even Sam the one that ran away from his family to have a ever so happy apple pie life at College stood up to the plate when it came to a hunt. You’re whiny attitude isn’t helping so if I were you I’d buck up because I will not stand for any liabilities!’’
(First)’s shoulders slumped the fight leaving her body only to be replaced by a feeling of vulnerability and weakness. The words that her father had spat at her made her heart bled and her chest constrict, what had she done to cause him to hate her so much?
An ear piercing howl ripped through the forest followed by a stench of death, (First) pulled her scarf over her nose to save it from falling off from the sharp smell. ‘’Here it comes, get ready!’’
She took the gun off safety and held it up ready to shoot at anything that came towards her, the hunting rifle felt familiar in her hands bring her an odd sense of comfort. The tree’s next to her shuffled like the wind had blown past them, the heavy snow falling of the branches. It’s closer.
All that she caught was a black blur as the creature dive passed her and Caleb, she turned and took a shot only successfully piercing the creature's leg but that didn’t stop it from taking a swing at Dean before taking off into the cover of the trees.
Dean’s back hit the tree with a crack the air forced out of his lungs, blood trickled out the side of his mouth. ‘’Dean!’’ John watched as his eldest passed out eyes rolling into the back of his head. ‘’Shit! Caleb we need to leave!’’
The Foeda Demon attacked once more going for (First) who narrowly avoided getting sliced open by its long claws. It stood in front of her rising on it’s hind legs, it’s grey fur was decorated with tiger like stripes down its front arms, with eyes of pure ice. She felt the hairs on her neck stand on end as it raised its head and let out a loud rumble that made her body shake. The night echoed with the call of the wild as she stumbled back, tripping over an exposed tree root. Her body shook with fear as she looked up at him the demons lips pulled back in a snarl, it’s horns on the top of it’s head gleamed in the moonlight.
(First) turned her head around but found herself completely alone.
~
Dean who had now awoken bundled himself into the Impala his ribs burning from the strain of trying to take in deep breaths, ‘’Dammit Dad, you should of listen to (First)!’’ John ignored the comment and chose to floor the gas pedal high tailing it out of there. ‘’Girl shoulda done her damned research.’’
‘’She did.’’
‘’It wasn’t good enough! There had to be something that we can use to protect ourselves!’’ John seethed as he turned the corner, Dean glanced to the back on the car only to find the seat empty. ‘’Where is she?’’
‘’Probably jumped in with Caleb. Told him to get outta there a quickly as possible after it took you out.’’
‘’I’ll get you one thing, that son of a bitch was fugly.’’
Back at the motel John helped Dean out of the Impala and left him on the bonnet of the car to rest as they waiting for Caleb to join them. Now they needed a whole new plan to take down that son of a bitch. Caleb wasn’t far behind them but it made both of the Winchesters stomachs sink when he got out of his car - alone.
‘’Dude, where’s (First)?’’
‘’I thought she got in the car with you.’’ All three of them exchanged looks but gain a wide eyed looks when the situation sunk in. ‘’Fuck!’’ John cursed, ‘’I told her to run!’’
First comes denial.
‘’You didn’t check to see if she was with you?’’ Caleb asked as he was climbing back into his car ready to go back. ‘’I gave the order to run, if she didn’t listen -’’
‘’Dad. You left her behind.’’
‘’No I didn’t!’’ John argued, ‘’We have to go back! She’ll get killed!’’ Dean managed to scream out.
~
The air was thick around her as she tried and tried again to get the lighter to work, ‘’Come on, come on.’’ She pleaded as she flicked the lighter once more almost jumping for joy as it lit, her battle with the Foeda Demon hadn’t left her unscathed her winter coat had been torn of her leaving her in nothing but a thin hoodie and her shirt which she ripped to get the cloth to wrap around the end of the stick to use as a torch.
Blood was dripping from a nasty gash where she’d been clawed, it ranged from her right hip all the way up to her left shoulder, her left arm was more than likely broken from where she was thrown against the ground. Vision burling and muscles aching but she refused to give up, she was not a liability. The Demon roared once more ready to charge but this time she was ready, she swung the torch in front of her halting it in its tracks. It screeched but stayed where it was snapping it’s jaws at the air, ‘’Dude, you fugly.’’
It screeched again and she wasted no time in taking off making sure to stop every now and again to wave the torch in front of it slowing it down. (First) hoped and prayed that the lake wasn’t frozen over. With one final attempted to take the creature down before it killed her, she ran sprinting as fast as she could to the lake.
‘’No.’’ She breathed out as she found the lake frozen over, ‘’Shit, shit, shit.’’ Without stopping (First) continued to run feet sliding from underneath her as she met the ice. (First) scrambled to her knees gun held tight in her hand and she took a shot only to curse when it completely missed.
The ice started to crack under the weight of the demon the water pooling around her knees, it raised itself on its hind legs ready to strike her down this would be the blow to kill her with no strength left she allowed her head to bow down.
‘’(First)!’’
Dean. That was Dean. The Demon turned allowing its chest to be completely defenseless as fast as lightning she picked up her gun firing three shots into its heart. The Demon groaned as the silver penetrating its heart before crashing down. Breaking the ice and plunging her and it into the freezing waters below.
‘’No!’’ The three hunters watched in horror as she was plunged into the icy waters below, they thought that they hadn’t seen nothing worse that watching as (First) accepted her fate, her battered and broken body was ready to give up but no, this was worse.
Time seemed to slow to a halt as they waiting for any signs of her repairing, ‘’Come on kiddo, show yourself.’’ Dean spoke his eyes not moving from the spot where she fell. The water broke once more as (First) pulled her way to the surface gasping for air. John watched as he saw his youngest struggle to pull herself out of the freezing waters.
‘’Come on kiddo! You can do it!’’ Dean hollered encouragements as she pulled herself out of the water. ‘’That’s it! Come on sweetheart pull yourself forward.’’ (First) could barely hear the words of her brother as the world slowly started to become blurry around her.
‘’I am not weak, I am not a liability.’’
Slowly she started to drag herself ignoring the pain that filled every cell of her body as she stretched out her arm, fingers curled around her wrist and gave her the finally pull that she needed. Dean’s arms were inviting but did nothing to fight the cold that riddled her body.
‘’We need to get her to the hospital, now!’’
The journey was nothing but a blur to (First) as she laid cradled to her brother's chest her wounds had started bleed once more and the pain in her arm was unbearable. She was barely even conscious as she was carried into hospital.
‘’Somebody help!’’
~
Second comes anger.
Caleb watched as the two Winchester men screamed at each other Dean was putting the blame on John for not having the decency to check on both his children, ‘’All you had to do was turn around!’’
‘’I know that Dean but I clearly gave an order!’’
‘’Clearly you wasn’t giving a shit, now she is lying in a hospital bed barely clinging on to life!’’
That part was true, (First) had sustained many injuries thanks to the ‘bear’ that had attacked her and chased her onto the ice. With a broken arm, three broken ribs, the claw marks that needed over one hundred stitches to close up as well as the infection from the claws of the demon but to top it all off was the extreme case of hypothermia. (First) was one step away from complete organ failure. Now only time would tell.
‘’She told you something was wrong, you should have listened!’’ Dean was lucky only sustaining a mild concussion and fractured ribs which soon would been broken ones if he didn’t take it easy and rest like he was told. ‘’Dean -’’
‘’No, no, I made a promise that I would keep her safe! I thought it would be from fugly creatures such as that nasty son of a bitch but clearly I need to keep her safe from you!’’ Dean’s face was red with anger, John wasn’t doing much better. ‘’Keep her safe from me? I am her father it is my job to make sure she is safe!’’
‘’You keeping her safe?’’ Dean shook his head, ‘’How? By constantly belittling her? Making her feel like she isn’t worth her weight in salt?’’
‘’What do you mean?’’
‘’Since Sammy left you’ve done nothing but train her, scold her over nothing, you even took her out of school. You don’t see her panic when she can’t find something or makes the tiniest of mistakes.’’
‘’Mistakes cost lives -’’ John tried to defend his actions but was cut of by Dean, ‘’She knows that! That’s why she works for countless hours combing over the tiniest of details just so she won’t get a verbal lashing off you!’’
Dean winched from the shooting pain in his ribs but nothing was tear him away, ‘’She’s scared of you Dad and no child should be scared of their own father.’’ The realization of the situation hit John like a ton of bricks he stumbled back before taking off.
Third comes Bargaining.
John stumbled out of the hospital doors heart heavy with pain he sat on the curb and looked up into the sky. ‘’Mary, Mary, I’m so sorry. This - this isn’t what I wanted for our kids. I - I already chased one away and now I’m close to losing another. Please Mary, take me, take me not her. Please Mary take me.’’ He took in a deep breath, ‘’She deserves happiness, so does Dean and Sam. They don’t deserve this life but I need to keep them safe but I’m harming them more than saving them. Mary please my love, give her the strength to live I can’t lose another.’’
Fourth comes Depression.
Dean stayed at his spot near the bed watching over his baby sister as the ventilator breathed for her, it had been a whole week since the hunt as she was showing no signs of waking up. The phone shook in his hand as he contemplating making a call to Sammy.
Bobby had rushed down when John had called the old man had shed a tear when he saw the broken body of the once smiling girl. Bobby had tried everything to remove Dean from his his state of depression but to no avail, Dean only moved when he needed to go to the bathroom or when he was forced to return back to the motel to shower.
There was deep purple bags under his eyes in the past week he’d barely managed ten hours of sleep the pain in his ribs slowly started to ease of but it didn’t make him feel any better. In his mind he failed his baby sister in many ways; failed to keep her safe and failed to live up to the promise that he and Sam had made. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he pressed the call button.
‘’Dean?’’
‘’Sammy.’’ From Dean’s broken tone alone Sam knew that something was wrong, ‘’Dean, what’s wrong?’’
‘’Sammy it’s bad (First) she -’’
‘’Where are you?’’
‘’Salt lake Regional Medical center.’’ Dean could hear shuffling down the other end of the phone and a muffled conversation. ‘’I’m coming Dean, give me twelve hours.’’
‘’Okay Sammy.’’
Dean knew that it was a bad idea, Sammy and John but he couldn’t think of a better person to be sat with him at this moment. Bobby came into the room pushing a cup of coffee into his hands and patting him on the shoulder. ‘’I called Sam.’’
‘’And?’’
‘’He’s coming down.’’ Bobby nodded, ‘’If that Idgit,’’ meaning John, ‘’I’ll shoot his ass full of shotgun pellets he’ll be shitting metal for weeks.’’ That pulled a small smile from Dean but was quickly diminished into a tight lipped expression.
‘’Have you eaten?’’
‘’No.’’
‘’Dean -’’
‘’I know Bobby, I know.’’ Dean wouldn’t settle until he knew his sister was safe and her lying in a hospital bed still deep in a coma wasn’t safe.
Sammy arrived in record time sprinting into the hospital room, ‘’Dean -’’ The words died in his throat when he saw the scene in front him Dean was a mess but the sight of his younger sister lying in that hospital bed was heart breaking.
‘’It’s good to see you man.’’ Dean pulled him into a tight hug Sam could practically feel all the emotions that poured off of his brother. ‘’What happened?’’
‘’We were hunting a Foeda Demon and I took a hit got knocked out, dad panicked and ran. We had no idea that we left her behind.’’
‘’What?’’
‘’She took that sucker down though but god Sam she was a mess, the ice broke and she fell through it. Man it was like one of them old action flicks slow motion shit.’’ Dean managed to force out his throat closing, tears burning his eyes. ‘’It’s been a week and she hasn’t woken up. I - I woulda called you sooner but -’’
‘’You called that’s all that matter.’’ Sam walked over and took his sister's hand in his her hand was tiny compared to his. She looked so fragile, frail almost. ‘’Why a Foeda Demon those bastards are horrible.’’
‘’I don’t know.’’
‘’Where is he?’’ Dean knew exactly who Sam was talking about, ‘’Out somewhere with Caleb.’’
‘’Figures.’’
The Winchester brothers sat back in silence watching for any sights of life coming from their little sister. ‘’I’m sorry Sammy, I couldn’t keep my promise.’’ A single tear made it’s way down Dean’s pale face, Sam placed an arm around his brother whispering words of encouragement.
An air of peace settled over them but it was quickly ripped apart when John made a reappearance.
‘’What are you doing here?’’ John growled, ‘’So it’s not okay for me to see my little sister?’’
‘’You lost the title of brother when you walked out that door.’’
‘’You can’t stop me from seeing her!’’ Sam stood up going toe to toe with John towering over the older man. ‘’She wouldn’t be lying in that bed if you’d been looking out for her!’’
‘’Maybe if you hadn’t of run off she wouldn’t be here!’’
‘’Enough!’’ Bobby shouted from the door, ‘’Pull yourselves together that girl needs all three of you to stow your crap, now shut your traps and sit down!’’ The cap wearing hunted nodded to himself when they all sat down, ‘’Good to see you Sam.’’
‘’You too Bobby.’’

A week slowly melting into two and then to three and that was when they had their first signs of (First) waking up. It was a simple twitch of her fingers but it was something, ‘’Come on sweetheart, I need you to wake up.’’ Dean spoke quietly brushing his fingers through her hair back a grip on her hand. ‘’Sammy’s here, he came down for you. Please kiddo I need you to walk up.’’
Her eyelids started to flutter, ‘’Just like that, come on open your eyes you can do it.’’ Dean whispered words of encouragement were enough to finally pull his baby sister out of the three week slumber. She started to cough and splutter the ventilator tube causing issues. Dean was quick on his feet calling for the nurses. The tube was quickly removed, breathing now coming in short shallow movements but it didn’t matter she was alive.
‘’Dean.’’ Her voice was crocky from being unused, dry from the tube that had been shoved down her throat to keep her breath. ‘’Hey sweetheart.’’ The doctor walked in to give her a once over the grey haired man helped her sit up. ‘’You are one lucky girl (First) gave us all a scare.’’
‘’Sorry.’’
‘’Nothing to be sorry for, bears are nasty creatures.’’ Her eyebrows furrowed at the word ‘bear’, ‘’The infection from the claw marks is now gone, that arm of yours will need a lot longer to heal and your ribs, you’re going to have to be mighty careful bed rest until they heal.’’
He tapped his flipchart with his pen, ‘’I still want to keep you in to keep you monitored but for now I’ll leave you to it.’’
‘’Thank you doctor.’’
Dean raised a glass to her lips the cold water felt wonderful on her dry and scratchy throat, she nodded her head in thanks and settled back down. ‘’Dean what happened?’’
‘’What do you remember?’’ She looked at the ceiling trying to recall, ‘’I remember running and the demon. Oh Dean, I’d never been as scared in my life.’’ She hiccuped covering her face as the tears started to trickle down her cheeks. ‘’Come here.’’ Dean cupped her face in his hands wiping away her tears with his thumbs, ‘’You’re alive and that’s all that matters.’’
‘’But Dad’s gunna be pissed at me.’’
‘’I’ll kick his ass.’’ Dean spotted Sammy standing in the doorway and smile, ‘’Anyway there is someone waiting to see you.’’ He motioned at the door, (First) turned her head and she swore to God that her heart stopped. ‘’Sammy.’’
‘’Hey there squirt.’’ She opened her arms and Sam wasted no time in crossing the room, holding her against him. ‘’Why are you here?’’
‘’My little sister in hospital? You think I wouldn’t come rushing down?’’
‘’What about college?’’ Sam smiled, ‘’All sorted don’t you worry about nothing.’’
It was Bobby who turned up next quickly followed by Caleb who might they had had to calm down from a full blown panic attack. John followed last which changed the atmosphere of the room all together. (First) tried to sink into the pillows as far as she could. ‘’I want to speak to my daughter alone.’’
When nobody moved John let out a sigh, ‘’Please.’’
‘’You hurt her and I’ll not think twice about shooting you.’’ Bobby growled in his ear, Sam and Dean where the last to leave. ‘’You need us give us a shout, okay?’’ John sat down on the bed carefully avoiding the multiple tubes. (First) eye’s stayed down glancing at the IV that was in her hand.
‘’You were out for three weeks you know.’’
‘’I’m sorry, sir I’ll do better on the next hunt I swear, I’m not a liability sir.’’
Oh my God. John let out a deep breath everything had become clear the Foeda Demon prays on the weak and the vulnerable, the reason why that son of a bitch had almost killed his daughter was because she was feeling vulnerable and he was the one that made her feel that way. It had attacked Dean knowing that it would cause himself to panic and leave.
‘’How? By constantly belittling her? Making her feel like she isn’t worth her weight in salt?’’
‘’She’s scared of you Dad!’’
What had he done? He was supposed to protect his daughter from everything but it was true; she needed protecting from him. I’m so sorry Mary.

‘’You did nothing wrong (First)’’

‘’But I messed up the hunt I -I.’’ John rested his hand on top of his daughters cursing at himself as he felt her shaking. ‘’The hunt doesn’t matter anymore, the demon is dead and you almost died. Now you rest staying in bed and that’s an order.’’
‘’I want my Dad back.’’
John turned around and gaped at his youngest, ‘’W-what?’’
‘’I want my Dad, not a drill sergeant. Why are you pushing me away?’’ His heart shattered into tiny pieces. He was learning that he tough love approach wasn’t working any longer in keeping his kids safe, he’d successfully pushed one away and almost lost another. John pulled his youngest to him cradling her to his chest so he could rest his chin on the top of her head. She cried freely out of pain, out of fear. ‘’Listen to me, you are not a liability, you are a strong and beautiful young woman who is a damn sight better hunter than her daddy. You’re the only person I know to take down one of them fugly bastards by themselves.’’
‘’From now on there is no drill sergeant I am your father and I will be just that.’’ John paused swallowing hard, ‘’Alway remember that I love you kiddo.’’
‘’I love you too, Dad.’’
And finally comes Acceptance.