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Description
Wake up, it's a fresh start. Brush your teeth, comb your hair. In an hours time you'll step out into the big, wide world. Then you'll be shut in a box until it gets dark. You'll do dull things on behalf of exciting people. This is who you are. This is the life you lead.
The average person always seems so sure of their motives and where their journey will lead them. The average person takes life by the horns and guides it in the direction they want to go, but what if you are different?
I can take a white sheet and paint any scene that comes to my mind, I can create joy, I can create sorrow, I can paint a bustling city scene or a fantasy realm rules by dragons and knights. I can envision and reflect anything, yet I cannot imagine where my life will lead me. Some people call this being free and creative, yet it leads me to feel isolated, lost and confused. Routine makes me nervous, yet mess makes me stressed.
I woke up late that morning, I didn't care much. Muddy light poured in between the rows of the blinds, I watched it for a moment, silently shimmering from the dust that swirled around the bedroom. I watched them dancing for a few minutes while my thoughts tried to escape from my feelings. Every day I'd get up and try to be an average person, but today I just didn't feel willing to co-operate. I picked up my phone and dialled the office number.
"Hello, is that Daniel?... Oh, um, yeah," my voice rattled with nerves. "I'm afraid I've been awake all night and I'm feeling extremely unwell with an upset stomach, I won't be in today."
I hung up after it was recommended that I see my doctor, as this was my third sick-day of May, and we were only two weeks into the month. These days were not uncommon.
With that, I sank back under the duvet and closed my eyes.
Waking up two hours later, I groaned loudly; Just like every other semi-sick day, guilt had set in and I blamed myself. I could never understand where these days came from, but when they arrived, they knocked me back and I'd always struggle with my emotions. I've never known what's right for me. Days would come and go and I would just sit back and watch, wondering what happened to my childhood hopes and dreams, my intense imagination and my creative drive. What happened to my friends? Were they ever my friends? Did my boring life make me into just another dull nobody? Sometimes it would feel like I was the only person in the world that felt this way.
I longed for friends, companions, someone who I could relate to. I longed to learn how I could lead a life where I could display my creative side as an extrovert rather than a nervous wreck. When did all of this start? Will it ever stop?

Description
Wake up, it's a fresh start. Brush your teeth, comb your hair. In an hours time you'll step out into the big, wide world. Then you'll be shut in a box until it gets dark. You'll do dull things on behalf of exciting people. This is who you are. This is the life you lead.
The average person always seems so sure of their motives and where their journey will lead them. The average person takes life by the horns and guides it in the direction they want to go, but what if you are different?
I can take a white sheet and paint any scene that comes to my mind, I can create joy, I can create sorrow, I can paint a bustling city scene or a fantasy realm rules by dragons and knights. I can envision and reflect anything, yet I cannot imagine where my life will lead me. Some people call this being free and creative, yet it leads me to feel isolated, lost and confused. Routine makes me nervous, yet mess makes me stressed.
I woke up late that morning, I didn't care much. Muddy light poured in between the rows of the blinds, I watched it for a moment, silently shimmering from the dust that swirled around the bedroom. I watched them dancing for a few minutes while my thoughts tried to escape from my feelings. Every day I'd get up and try to be an average person, but today I just didn't feel willing to co-operate. I picked up my phone and dialled the office number.
"Hello, is that Daniel?... Oh, um, yeah," my voice rattled with nerves. "I'm afraid I've been awake all night and I'm feeling extremely unwell with an upset stomach, I won't be in today."
I hung up after it was recommended that I see my doctor, as this was my third sick-day of May, and we were only two weeks into the month. These days were not uncommon.
With that, I sank back under the duvet and closed my eyes.
Waking up two hours later, I groaned loudly; Just like every other semi-sick day, guilt had set in and I blamed myself. I could never understand where these days came from, but when they arrived, they knocked me back and I'd always struggle with my emotions. I've never known what's right for me. Days would come and go and I would just sit back and watch, wondering what happened to my childhood hopes and dreams, my intense imagination and my creative drive. What happened to my friends? Were they ever my friends? Did my boring life make me into just another dull nobody? Sometimes it would feel like I was the only person in the world that felt this way.
I longed for friends, companions, someone who I could relate to. I longed to learn how I could lead a life where I could display my creative side as an extrovert rather than a nervous wreck. When did all of this start? Will it ever stop?