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Kinla — Ah sheeet
Published: 2016-09-21 15:37:24 +0000 UTC; Views: 599; Favourites: 22; Downloads: 0
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WARNING: all text below is a MOODY rant, if you care not for rants move along
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today is off to a great start....
-Shitty weather
-Friend I go workout with had sleep problems so no going to gym today
-Wake up to find a friend deactivated their account...
- Hangry...lol
And I'm just powerless -slow clap- well done life, I haven't had my coffee yet or have had breakfast so I'm a emotional mess. You win this round life!
not being able to work out today + weather, I can get over, not a big deal.
but to see a friend having a hard time to a point of just going "fuck it I give up, peace *leaves* " REALLY makes me feel like shit.
Older I get I noticed how unhelpful I've gotten, no matter how hard I try in my own way, months later the cycle starts again till shit hits the fan yet again. When a friend suffers and you cant do shit, it sucks.
I make friends suffer because of my moods yeah, they worry about me, and I'm grateful, but I will never get to the point where I just cant take it anymore and drop everything...I just get over it. But when I see someone I care about do that I want to punch something BECAUSE I CANT DO SHIT. I'm butts at talking about feelings 95% of the time, and I fully know just listening doesn't help as much as I'd like, making art for those in pain is only a temp band-aid that'll come off easy during storms..
I'm just a ball of stupid, that isn't smart enough to help, and it's so flipping frustrating. OMG. I just want to go back to bed at this point and skip the day because this sucks lol. I really need to buy a punching bag cause these emotions right now just make me want to throw up OTL
I'm not really to the point of tears, too half asleep for that shit, but uggh the frustration is real, I need a easy button or a book for dummies to know what do.
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Comments: 19
ahh i hope it can get better sometime! ;0;
i know i'm late to the case but if there's anyway to help,
I'll be up for it and try! ;w; It's sad that sometimes we
all in this situation. We all hate it and wish we could do
more, but either am able to do nothing. But if there's
something others can do for you, i can be that other
and help ;w; I'm fairly easy to talk to so if you need anyone
to rant to, I'm here! :'D
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me too, but sadly it's just a waiting game at this point for them to message me on skype and/or return to DA...nothing else can be done -flops on side-
Otherwise, with my own emotional roller coasters, I personally normally done talk about my own emotions, I draw about it, talk very little then move on after drawing. (99% of the time works for me) for some reason I have a hang up talking about my feelz so draging out talking what I'm going through makes things worse for me :/ no idea why Always told/asked to confide in people but that is more painful then holding shit in XD
but thanks for offering to be another I can lean on when I need someone to rant to ^w^
Iz a new day, and I feel a crap load better then I did yesterday lol. (though a be sleep still bweeh I want to go back to bed D= pffft )
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eh that's too bad! :'0
and yea, if if helps you release from stress by drawing,
that's what you should do! ;w; and if you don't want
to share, you honestly dont have to! whatever makes
you comfortable ;w;
and yea i rant a lot too so i totally understand :'0
and as long as you feel better, another better day
is to come :')
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The fact that we cant always help everybody doesn't make us useless or not helpful.
Sometimes things are beyond our control, and I'm sure your friends appreciate you trying so hard to help them, and I think it says a lot about you.
I don't know how much it helps, but I think you are a great person <33
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I know..it just erks me to no end ;w;
I just wish I tried more :/ I question if I even know how to be a friend sometimes XD I think making art for comfort is good enough but I know over all it's not good enough =m=;
I feel I worry more then taking action, which I would think says a bad thing about me. lol
Wish I felt like a good person :/ but thank you
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I can understand how you feel...
I still think though that you are being too harsh with yourself...
And I'm sure you'll feel better eventually
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-flails arms- I know bad habit bweeeeh.
-hug- yeeeeh, feel greatly better the next day X3
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i know how it feels, and the fact that you care about your friends makes yourself a beautyfull person! 
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yeeeh =w= I just wish we had one of those talk every day kind of friendships, but we dont, it's more of those talk once in a while friendships, which I'm content with...until something like this happens. Which always makes me question those what if I did something else, like forced ourselves to talk alot, would things have been different :/ I'm so erked when I think about it.
I'm painfully aware it's not really my fault, but cant help but put blame on myself because of my "what if" thinking all the time.
sigh~ wish it was because of the weather, but I've seen them feel troubled for a long time with on and off waves..I never knew what to say in those situations, because I have the same mind set as them most of the time, I just never take action with how I feel so always feel as if I'd be a hypocrite.
drinking my coffee now though so starting to feel a bit better =m= its sweetness calms me.
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yeee! coffie is the best! X3
wow, are they like this all the times?
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yess coffee bringer of life XD
Not really (least in the past) been going on more these past few years, least more noticeable OmO...they've been hit by a few curve balls from life recently and their negative thinking of their own abilities just adds un-needed stress.
Over all, I'm starting to think it's for the best they stepped back from DA, just added to their stress life. Just wish it was easy to stay in contact with them OTL
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yee! X3
;^; im so sorry
but i think school issues are one of their mean reasons tho, but come on! they can't stay like this forever! u know, i was like them a couple years ago, i was always sad and not impressed with my drawings etch, but now i improved drawing, and im happy now, not because something happened, but cuz i grew the fuck up and i learned to be glad of what i have, and i hate to see people with a computer and food and clothes and a phone and a big talent in art being sad for no fucking reason at all, life's short, why are you so serious?be glad of what you have!
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I think changing ones mood and way of thinking is easier said then done however XD
Dont think it's a matter of "growing up and being greatful/thankful for what you have" some people aren't that strong since everyone grows up differently
Always alot of factors that lead people into these negative mindsets and without the right distraction it's hard to fix alone or with others.
I'm 28 years old, and still have depressing spells of my worth as a artist and have emotional breakdowns because of the direction of my life...But I find myself distractions, be it cartoons,videos,drawing,gaming, going outside...etc.
I can escape from my stressful thinking, some cant so easily if their scars in life are worse off.
When there isn't a reason to be sad, it's more of a hormone thing + how the mind works. But normally there is a reason, Like i said, they got hit by alot of things going on in their life these past years and (school issues) isn't really one of them.
but now I think I'm just half asleep arguing on the matter, really need my coffee -dies-
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k, think what ya wanna think, no one is happy anyway, every happy thing is a lie and everybody's gonna die! XD ahhh life.... what a beauty... that's why i never give a single fuck about anything and take life as a joke, to forget that humanity is killing himself more everyday and people are becoming dumber.
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I'm not really sure how to help or if these words are the right words but it will be ok. Do you have any other method of getting in touch with your friend who left? Perhaps in a day or 2 when they've cooled down they will reactivate long enough to contact you? Don't feel that you alone must fix everyone's problems. I know you want to. But it's not possible. I'm sure just knowing that you are there for them helps. It's hard when you feel helpless. It's the worst. Just try to focus on what you can do.
As for the gym, I understand not wanting to go alone. If you need the happy endorphins I'd suggest putting on music you like and having a dance instead <:3c
The weather will pass and please EAT! Be kind to yourself ok?
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Yeaah, I know it'll be okay, life beats me up but I normally don't let it keep at it, life is a asshole though. lol.
I have their skype, but they never seem to get on there or reply...so....-shrug- It's sadly the waiting game for when/if they return OmO Hopefully this passes and they feel better soon =m=
I normally dont feel like I need to fix everything, but when things like this happen I just cant help but feel I could have done something better or different ;w; but agree, there isn't anything I could have done to change things, when a person gets like that they have to sort things out themselves....just sucks ugggh.
all I can do is wait, which again frustrates me -wiggles on floor-
LOL I'd dance if our houses floor wasn't so old, being a heavy weight person + shitty floors makes me feel heavier then I really am XDD (I'm watching funny videos and drawing to lift my spirits)
I wouldn't mind so much going to the gym alone if I A. could drive B. was a member. But I'm only a guest when I go with her and dont drive 
Yeee after posting this the weather was already starting to clear up =3 and I'll eat dont worry there XD it's early my time zone and eating right away after waking up makes me all icky OmO
thanks for your words though -hugs face-
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Ow my heart. I know this sort of helpless feeling very well. I've seen groups of friend divide and there is nothing I can do about it. One of my closest friends in this word has a really rough family life and there is nothing I can do for them other than just talk most nights, or distract them with our characters that they and I love so much.
I know I can't make the pain and frustration you're feeling go away, but I love you and know how you feel. I know I don't come onto skype to chat nearly as often as I should, but you are constantly in my thoughts.
I hope you feel better soon.
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Being human sucks! we can do so much but yet still are able to do so little! -nomz on desk- rerererere.
it's nice when the little things help, but when even those dont work anymore -longest sigh in the world-
-flops on side- our hearts are going to emplode someday i swear Prism XD
-snuggles face- thanks, I acknowledge I'm not alone and in the same boat as many others, just wish none of this bull happened to anyone >=c I'm perfectly fine feeling this way after watching a sad movie or something but hitting close to home shouldn't be allowed! lol.
I'll get there, distractions help. uggh that face snuggle emote, gives me life
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