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kml91225 — Secret 18
Published: 2011-06-30 06:59:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 1519; Favourites: 51; Downloads: 11
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It's like they want me to be better again so they act as if I'm okay. They want their little girl back and so do I. I feel like I'm letting them down because I can't seem to get back who I used to be, the happy me.Related content
Comments: 48
I wonder if we can go back - but rather you become a new you (Fuck "them" if they want the old you back).
I think we become wiser, more experience, battle-hardened you. The downside is that we miss the simplicity, the innocence, the blissful ignorance of the fact that the world is not a nice a place as we would like it to be.
But I do think we can recover the best of the old you or insert what was missing from the old you.
My father was violent, angry and had no time for his children. I lived in fear. I had no childhood. I don't want to go back to the old me.
But I want to insert what was missing.
I friend of mine's first child, as a toddler, one day took the end of the roll of toilet paper and walked around the house trailing toilet paper from room to room. He thought it was a great stunt and laughed.
My father would have been angry and violent instead of letting a kid be a kid.
I was inspired by this story. When I got home I took rolls of toilet paper and went all around the house wrapping everything in toilet paper. It was pointless and illogical but it was fun!
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Aww, you were adorable back then! You look beautiful now too
Anywho, I wanna go back in time and change little me. I want her to be a nice sweet girl. But instead I was a horrible child who did nothing but cause her parents trouble. Sometimes I wonder why I was born...
I am sorry for spamming your inbox with messages.
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Im on meds and seeing a councillor for my anxiety...but its not enough. I still dont feel like me. How much do we have to go through to get ourselves back? Have we gone too far?
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I don't think I'm the right person to ask because I'd say yeah we've gone too far and that's not very hopeful or helpful. I also don't know that depths of your issues so maybe you're still savable. For myself I fear that no one can help me do this (get better) and I fear I"m not strong enough and can't do it myself
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I think your savable, though I dont know you very well. We can get through this together. Perhaps not power in numbers, but saftey in numbers?
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Definitely safety in numbers. If you ever need anyone note me :]
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Thank you...and same goes for you.
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My mom constantly tells me she wants her daughter back. She tells me that she hates who I am now.
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Well, if it's any consolidation to you, I'm getting her back.
I didn't have depression, but I did have something else...
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I'm so happy to hear that your getting her back. Gives me hope that I can get mine back :]
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mhmm, I lost the old me a looong time ago... Now I'm just Ghost
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You can bring you back. Or accept that people change as they grow
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I have accepted it cuz I found that the most important thing is to love yourself & I do (:
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Good. It's best to love yourself no matter what.
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She's still there. Depression is trying to keep her hidden.
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It is, and it's full of lies. You are so much stronger than it can ever hope to be.
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last thing i need is them figuring out the problems they've caused me and then feeling guilty about it
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why not they should feel guilty
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they had good reasons to move even if they don't realize what it's done to me
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I completely understand how you feel. But I think it is me that misses her not them, perhaps because they don't really see the me I have become... or else they would.
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I think that's exactly how I feel. I miss her. My parents realize a little of whats happening but not all of it.
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Sounds about the same as with me. I don't think anymore but me has the whole picture. My parents knew me back then but not now and my boyfriend, he knows me know but didn't know me back then.
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Yeah everyone only gets a piece of the whole picture except the one painting it.
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my parents still treat me like a little girl, they dont see me as a teenager, and because of that they're missing aspecs of my life, they need to see... some worse then others...
i like the picture, and i hope you get happy soon... i hated when i felt like this...
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It's sad that they're missing out.
Thank you :] it really is little me and I think I might be happy soon I'm working on it
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I miss my happy me too.may be one day our happy part will return
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My DAd hasn't seen me since all this crap started happening. Teh rest of my family [Except my cuz] always say [I used to be a hippy] "WE want the Hippy Amber back" I hate it.
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Its annoying and everyone always agrees
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Yes. Stupid Family, you'll never understand...
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No I was talking about Family, after I sent that I realized you might take it the wrong way. XD
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oh they'll never understand I got it now
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XD I was thinking "OH SHIT! SHE MIGHT TAKE IT THE WRONG WAY! XD"
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