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Lummh In reply to lunchymunchies [2018-02-07 23:24:09 +0000 UTC]

The point here is that there is no point that Nightmare Moon'ld learn something. It would mean that she'ld know how the future is. That would create a paradox. And after what happened, a paradox (especially a big one like that, because it's Luna, a millenar alicorn, not a random pony) is the last thing Tempora needs.

Besides, Nightmare Moon IS Luna and in the end, Luna has learnt something so Nightmare Moon has too.


BUT I'm agree with you. In fact, I've made something like that in a previous version.
A talk between Luna and Nightmare Moon. The story started to be way too long, it would needed ten or more pages (we'ld have been able to reach the 150 pages, and remember, two weeks per page). So, since Luna wasn't the main focus, I was forced to cut it and change this. It was easier to use Nightmare Moon's madness to skip this part.


Here's the previous version of the script (Careful -> Google translation from French):

When Nightmare Moon met Luna:

Luna hits Nightmare Moon full force, their head hitting, dropping their respective crowns.

Celestia: Luna!
NM: What was ...?
Luna to Celestia: Careful, sister ... Anyone who leaves the battlefield disappears ...
Celestia: How ?!
NM to Luna: Rrgnn ... Is this possible? ... Would you be me from the past?
Luna: Sorry to disappoint you. I am your future.


NM: My future? Aaah hahaha! No way! I can't be defeated. Besides, why are you protecting this vermin? Have you not yet understood that you're only destined to be her shadow?
Luna: Keep your words for yourself! I'll never forgive myself the acts that I've been able to commit while being you.
NM: Absurd!
Luna: As absurd as facing you one day myself. Looks like luck smiles on me.
NM: Hm! Facing me? Even to you two, weak as you are, your defeat is certain.
Luna: Who knows?
NM: Very well! If you're really my future, then don't mind if I hurl you both to a fatal destiny.

When Tirek has been defeated (in another way) (no story board):

Luna: It's finally over ...
Celestia: Thanks goodness.
NM: Not quite ...

NM, breathless, prepares a magic ray in their direction.

NM: Only you, "my sister", is left now. I'll find a way to solve this surrounding situation.

Luna stands in front of her sister.

NM: Step aside!
Luna: No.
NM: Then you will share her destiny.
Luna: I have a secret for you.
NM: A secret? Ha! You forget that I must know it! You're me after all!
Luna, coming forward: Nightmare Moon ...

*** (it was another version of Tempora rescue)
Tempora: No ... We ... have to agree ... with Rainbow Flash ... We must ... keep trying ... We finally have no choice either ... Against such situations, alone we are weak ... So ... Do not hesitate more ... Use your magic on us ... Use the magic of friendship ... Your power has led us to this state. Maybe ... he'll finish us but ... maybe he could be ... our last hope ...

TS is perplexed then all clash against her.
TS: Girls, this's our last chance. Maybe you're right Rainbow Dash. Perhaps there is always a way even when it seems improbable. Let's try this one.
RD: Hey! It's the loyalty that spoke, Twilight!
TS: Princess Tempora ...

TS and Luna say together: You're not alone anymore.

Twilight must drop time protection to manage Rainbow Power with others. The world then collapses on them and makes them disappear but before that is over, an explosion of light pierces time.
Tempora radiates. The mane 6 also. Their magic reaches Tempora as it floats in the sky while Nightmare Moon freezes.
The metal wings and the jewelry of Tempora fall.
Tempora is bathed in light and a shock occurs on any Equestria.
An explosion of light then restores it to its original state and a powerful shock wave sounds and eliminates all the anomalies of time.

***
NM: Not alone anymore...? What do you… ? I ... Why? ...

NM is blowing.

NM: What ?! My body… ? But I ... I'm really an anomaly ... (she looks at Luna) Luna ... I ... I don't know from what time you are but ... I promise you ...
 "Not alone" ... Know that these words you just said ... have reasoned in me ... Never, in the future, you 'll be alone. (she picks up her helmet)
Luna: I know it. Failing to have the Shadowbolts, I have my sister and my friends.
NM: But especially ... you have me ... Whenever loneliness will look for you, I'll be there for you too. It's a royal promise.
She pauses
NM: See you soon ...
Dawn appears at the same time as Nightmare Moon disappears.

Luna lowers her eyes. Celestia wraps her under his wing.

Celestia: Don't worry, Luna, I'm here. No matter what form you have been in, I am and will always be proud of you, Luna.
Luna smiled at her.
Luna: Yeah, I've protected ourselves well, huh. Eh eh…

They stay together, motionless. Soldiers appear, disoriented.

******

Here was the previous version. I must confess that I prefer this version but like I said, we needed to cut it.

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AvoidingFever17 In reply to Lummh [2023-12-15 23:55:27 +0000 UTC]

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azerek1994 In reply to Lummh [2018-02-14 00:27:46 +0000 UTC]

Amazing concept but honestly I like the published one more.

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Lummh In reply to azerek1994 [2018-02-14 02:34:16 +0000 UTC]

I'm glad!

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lunchymunchies In reply to Lummh [2018-02-08 02:42:03 +0000 UTC]

1. It would've created a paradox? So, everyone from the past now remembers what happened in this story? So, wouldn't that create a paradox, anyway? Even if Nightmare Moon doesn't find out Luna is her from the future, she still knows that this battle is going to happen in her future, and if she thinks Celestia created a clone of her, which she didn't in her time, then Nightmare Moon would have to think that that's a future Celestia, and that she loses, so she would end up completely changing her plans and end up winning. It doesn't matter if Nightmare Moon finds out about Luna because if these characters go still back to their back to their pasts but remember this battle, it's going to create a paradox anyway.

I just assumed that the past would automatically be fixed, and none of the past characters would remember this; everything they experienced would've ceased to exist. I don't think you had to try to "make it make sense" by purposely stopping past characters from learning certain things. If Nightmare Moon learned the future, and the past had just gone back to normal, no one would've questioned it.

2. I know you can't change it now, but I actually think that's the story you should've went with. I don't care if it makes the ending take way longer to get to; if the content I'm still getting is great, well, great, and it would make the story better ultimately. Eventually, everything surrounding but outside the story (like how long it took to make) will fade away, and all you'll have is the story itself,and that would've been better ultimately which to me is the most important thing. How good is the story after all is said and done? Putting all that stuff in would've resulted in a better product after all this is over.

Think of a story you really like. Now imagine an alternate timeline where the creator decided to cut out some of the good parts to get it out faster. Now, you would have a story you didn't like as much, and the cuts would actually feel painful.

Unless the reason it making the story longer bothers you is because you're tired of working on it? But that would be a personal reason for yourself, not an objective quality reason for the story. And I'm not judging; you've been working hard on this for years; it's understandable if you got burnt out and wanted to move on to other things. It happens all the time.

3. On that note, I think you should post that page in the gallery and put your comment in the description. This is so good, people deserve to know it, and it's a shame that people won't see it, which they won't if it's a comment under another picture.

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Lummh In reply to lunchymunchies [2018-02-08 03:04:00 +0000 UTC]

1. That's precisely because everyone from the past won't remember it that there is no point to learn them a lesson. It would be useless. I don't like that when it happens in a story. You live an adventure and in the end "I DON'T REMEMBER IT". I'm like "So what?". But I understand your feeling.

2. Making the story longer definitely bother us for some reasons yeah! We're already glad we'll almost finished it (especially Light, since I have finished my part like I said on my account).

3. I should but in this case, I should probably do the same thing for all the cut parts, or at least, a lot. There was a lot of way I've tried. The story has been rebuilt too many times now. Meh.

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lunchymunchies In reply to Lummh [2018-02-08 04:02:13 +0000 UTC]

I don't think it's pointless because:

1. All the present characters will still remember it, so it did happen, it will carry over to the future, and it didn't happen for nothing. Now, I would agree with you if the present characters didn't remember it (do you know anything about Sonic 06?), but a character from the past losing their memory of an altered timeline, out of a story with characters from the present, actually feels good to me because it completes the feeling of everything going back to being right, of things wrong being restored, and the presence of the present characters who will remember it makes it carry over and feel like it mattered and happened and wasn't for nothing.

2. But the big reason is for the audience. The past characters having those moments is good because they're cool things for the audience to experience, even if that character doesn't remember it. They're to entertain us in the moment.

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TheGrinningReaper09 In reply to lunchymunchies [2019-07-22 14:48:31 +0000 UTC]

I know this is a super old comment but I wanted to point out that do you even care how long it takes? You do know these hard working artists aren’t getting paid at all for doing this, they’re doing everything out of their free will to make a collaborative comic for everyone to enjoy, thank goodness they have a Patreon but that still doesn’t make up for how long it takes. I certainly would take shortcuts if I had to work all day without getting paid, so don’t blame them. I think they did an outstanding story, and it’s okay if you think they could’ve done better and added other things but I think it’s fine the way it is

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lunchymunchies In reply to TheGrinningReaper09 [2019-07-23 17:00:03 +0000 UTC]

"do you even care how long it takes?"

Well, that's rude.

Where in my comment did I say I didn't care how long it takes? But how long it takes exists outside of the story itself, and at the end of the day, I have to judge the thing itself? If it took more or less long, that's not going to effect how much I like the story because that's the same either way. How does me criticizing something in the story mean I don't care about artists?

And then you say "it’s okay if you think they could’ve done better and added other things", so what even was the point of that? Apparently, you don't because of how you felt the need to respond to me. Either you think it's okay or you don't. Pick.

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TheGrinningReaper09 In reply to lunchymunchies [2019-07-24 02:40:24 +0000 UTC]

I’m sorry but the way you worded your “critique” made it sound like you were complaining about it in the most immature way possible, you didn’t even word anything good about the comic either. Most people who demand more are usually not aware of the circumstances the artists are under and assume they can just whip up a new product for a couple of angry people despite having a majority of the audience enjoying the story the way it is. The entire point of saying “it’s okay” is the fact everyone can have an opinion and that’s chill but there is a difference between an opinion and criticism and I’m afraid yours sounds more like an opinion.

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lunchymunchies In reply to TheGrinningReaper09 [2019-07-25 08:11:02 +0000 UTC]

"the way you worded your “critique” made it sound like you were complaining about it in the most immature way possible"

I just said it plainly and calmly. I wasn't belligerent or insulting. I have no idea how else I could've worded it so you wouldn't have perceived it wrong and given me these passive-aggressive, slightly douchey replies.

"you didn’t even word anything good about the comic either"

I don't have to. I don't have to say something good in every comment where I say something bad, or else that means I dislike the thing I'm commenting on and think it has no worth and don't know how hard artists work and don't care about artists. Normal people can critically think and are cognizant of this and don't think that way. I don't read a comment under a Youtube video that's just a criticism of 1 aspect and think "This person must not care for the entire thing."

"Most people who demand more"

I did not "demand" more. Me saying "this would've been better if it was like this" is not me actually trying to get the artist to change it. Why do you think that criticisms are "demands" and not just expressions of opinions? And how would that even work; did you think I was demanding them to
remake the pages to retroactively make the story the way I wanted it?

"are usually not aware of the circumstances the artists are under and assume they can just whip up a new product"

Where in my comment did I even imply I thought that? That's you assuming things about me and not even logically. I don't see how criticizing a piece of entertainment is saying "Make it again and to my specifications!", and the vast majority of people do not think that way. I don't think that when I see someone criticize entertainment; I think "That person is expressing an opinion." You shouldn't make judgements about people without getting to know the truth 1st. And there shouldn't have even had to be an effort to find out; it was immediately apparent.

And you mentioning circumstances the artists are under goes back to what I was saying about how that exists outside the thing, and I have to just judge the thing itself. If someone worked hard or not hard on something, that's not going to make me like the thing more or less; it has to stand solely on whatever qualities the thing itself has.

"The entire point of saying “it’s okay” is the fact everyone can have an opinion and that’s chill but there is a difference between an opinion and criticism and I’m afraid yours sounds more like an opinion."

So, what is the problem? If it's an opinion, then what's wrong with me expressing an opinion? 1st, you say it's okay for me to have an opinion, but then you make a distinction where it sounds like the opinion distinction is bad. I don't get this.

And I would beg to differ that it's not a criticism because no, Nightmare Moon fighting Luna from the future and not knowing who it was is not more interesting than her finding out. Luna becomes evil because she things her existence is hopeless and then sees her future self is good because she finds she was wrong about everything and even defends everyone Luna hated against Nightmare Moon? How could you not want to see that over not seeing that? How could anyone be like "eh" over that? That's an existential discovery that cuts right to the core of who Luna/Nightmare Moon was. I hate when characters get close to a thing that would make them have a huge reaction but not actually discover it. And this isn't like Dale&Nancy&John Redcorn where they actually did things with Dale not finding out; nothing was done with Nightmare Moon not finding out; she just didn't. That was not used to tell an interesting story. It's not like instead of having her find out, they saw this other fantastic opportunity in the opposite; we just got nothing. She didn't find out so that...nothing. And they even said they cut it for time, not because they didn't think it was good, and Lummh even said they liked the cut version better.

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TheGrinningReaper09 In reply to lunchymunchies [2019-07-26 03:49:20 +0000 UTC]

I give up lol, you’re over analyzing something that’s supposed to be from a show meant for little kids. In my eyes this looks something that Hasbro would probably put out because the plot is simple enough for children to understand. Of course there’s opinions but you need to understand that opinions can not help an artist improve, it’s more of a slap in the face than improvement. It’s the same thing as giving a critique and leaving out all the good things they did making the artist feel like to you they did nothing good and should start over.

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lunchymunchies In reply to TheGrinningReaper09 [2019-07-28 11:07:56 +0000 UTC]

1. I left compliments on other pages.

2. You're making these comments under page 101. That would imply I think the comic has worth since I've stuck with it that long.

3. Considering the sea of compliments under every page, 1 slightly critical one is not gonna hurt their feelings.

4. Saying "I wish X had happened" is hardly over-analyzing.

5. What made the show good was that it held up to scrutiny, that it was quality and had a lot of thought put into it, so you can't "over-analyze it on the basis that it's made for little kids". Stuff made by the fandom has even less restrictions and can have even more thought, so it's even more fair to analyze it and claims of being able to over-analyze even less warranted.

6. "it’s more of a slap in the face than improvement. It’s the same thing as giving a critique and leaving out all the good things they did making the artist feel like to you they did nothing good and should start over."

Saying "I wish X happened" is hardly an affront. Don't be so melodramatic and oversensitive. I can guarantee you that the makers of this comic and most people are not that oversensitive that they can't handle someone saying "I wish X was in the story." They'll live. They're not to this day living in sadness, lying awake at night because I said this. I guarantee you they shrugged it off and immediately forgot about it and moved on.

7. Not every comment has to be about helping improve. Comment sections are for expressing yourself.

8. Okay, you keep going back and forth between saying opinions are fine but not fine. Which is it? I don't wanna hear you again say "opinions are fine, but-". If there's a "but" with stuff after it, that means you think they're not fine. You can't have it both ways. There's a saying that goes "Everything before the "but" is BS." Your response should either be "saying your opinion is fine" with nothing after it or "saying your opinion is totally not fine; it's wrong". Not awkwardly both like "It's fine to have opinions, but it's actually bad." When you double back on it, then you think it's not fine.

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Lummh In reply to BelladonnaErisMonroe [2018-02-04 21:34:50 +0000 UTC]

J-just read the description. Why do you think this is the last?

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Lummh In reply to NighttimeSerenity [2018-02-04 17:00:55 +0000 UTC]

Aw! Thank you very much!

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NighttimeSerenity In reply to LunaTheWhite [2018-02-04 16:56:19 +0000 UTC]

It is Tempora, for me it was incredibly obvious.
She was given that color ^^

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Rassiliana In reply to LunaTheWhite [2018-02-03 12:04:31 +0000 UTC]

Tempora I think

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Lummh In reply to DukeyDukeyDoo [2018-02-03 17:24:26 +0000 UTC]

Yes we are. This comics has 115 pages.

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DukeyDukeyDoo In reply to Lummh [2018-02-03 19:56:48 +0000 UTC]

So only 14 more pages to go?

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Lummh In reply to DukeyDukeyDoo [2018-02-03 20:32:53 +0000 UTC]

That's right.

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DukeyDukeyDoo In reply to Lummh [2018-02-03 22:39:09 +0000 UTC]

Alright. 

I just hope that once this comic will be completed, comic dubbers can start using it their advantages.

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Lummh In reply to DukeyDukeyDoo [2018-02-03 23:11:55 +0000 UTC]

Eh, you say it

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Lummh In reply to websplorer [2018-02-02 18:25:29 +0000 UTC]

Tempora thought the main desire of Luna was to follow the dream of a night loved by every ponies.

But this famous night wasn't the true desire of Luna. It was just not being alone. Like Tempora.

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websplorer In reply to Lummh [2018-02-02 20:10:12 +0000 UTC]

Ooooh, I see. Thanks

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jebens1 In reply to ChaosPhantom444 [2018-02-02 15:53:34 +0000 UTC]

Well I was wrong. It wasn't Starlight

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PhoenixFlambe In reply to ChaosPhantom444 [2018-02-02 15:13:37 +0000 UTC]

Bittersweet?

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