HOME | DD

Description

Seventeen years.

I've been on Deviant Art seventeen years. That -- doesn't seem real. I had so many hopes and dreams when I first started. Enthusiastic! Hopeful! Passionate (even though I still had so far to grow as an artist)! Now -- I honestly feel life has beaten me up a bit and it's a deliberate decision to be hopeful for the future.

I'm on daily meds now.

I've been hospitalized several times now.

I'm 43 and unmarried.

I have no wife. I have no children.

Some of my co-workers weren't alive when I graduated High School.

(When people say they were born in 2004 -- that doesn't seem real to me. That means you were born AFTER 9-11! What?!)

still, I'm not complaining --

I don't have baby mama drama or an ex-wife (which some of my friends/coworkers have - and they hate it)

I still have my mental and physical faculties (praise God for that).

I still love manga and video games (though the energy/passion to create my own comes and goes).

I recently started working on my game again (which I haven't looked at since Covid-19 happened and haven't worked on since 2018).

I sincerely love programming, and I'm excited to see what the future holds in that regard. (Games, tools, applications, bring 'em on!)

It's weird. My dreams changed from "I want to be a world class artist and draw for Disney or Marvel! Or make my own manga!" to "I hope I don't die alone. I hope I can afford a house one day. I hope I become financially stable enough to not only take care for myself, but those around me that I love. I hope getting sick doesn't financially ruin me. That would be awesome. "

Seventeen years.

When you're 20 years old you feel like you're going to live forever. When you're 40 years old, you're *very* aware of the fact that you won't. Use the time you have wisely. It goes faster than you think.

Much love and talk to you soon.

- Mike C

Description

Seventeen years.

I've been on Deviant Art seventeen years. That -- doesn't seem real. I had so many hopes and dreams when I first started. Enthusiastic! Hopeful! Passionate (even though I still had so far to grow as an artist)! Now -- I honestly feel life has beaten me up a bit and it's a deliberate decision to be hopeful for the future.

I'm on daily meds now.

I've been hospitalized several times now.

I'm 43 and unmarried.

I have no wife. I have no children.

Some of my co-workers weren't alive when I graduated High School.

(When people say they were born in 2004 -- that doesn't seem real to me. That means you were born AFTER 9-11! What?!)

still, I'm not complaining --

I don't have baby mama drama or an ex-wife (which some of my friends/coworkers have - and they hate it)

I still have my mental and physical faculties (praise God for that).

I still love manga and video games (though the energy/passion to create my own comes and goes).

I recently started working on my game again (which I haven't looked at since Covid-19 happened and haven't worked on since 2018).

I sincerely love programming, and I'm excited to see what the future holds in that regard. (Games, tools, applications, bring 'em on!)

It's weird. My dreams changed from "I want to be a world class artist and draw for Disney or Marvel! Or make my own manga!" to "I hope I don't die alone. I hope I can afford a house one day. I hope I become financially stable enough to not only take care for myself, but those around me that I love. I hope getting sick doesn't financially ruin me. That would be awesome. "

Seventeen years.

When you're 20 years old you feel like you're going to live forever. When you're 40 years old, you're *very* aware of the fact that you won't. Use the time you have wisely. It goes faster than you think.

Much love and talk to you soon.

- Mike C