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modelmeg2003 β 'Shame'
Published: 2011-05-08 06:39:46 +0000 UTC; Views: 6148; Favourites: 111; Downloads: 0
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Description
This is the hardest picture I've ever shared. I have a disorder called dermatillomania. It's an OCD spectrum disorder that is characterized by compulsive picking of the skin and nails. As you can see, it can cause a lot of damage. I never show my legs, and now the world knows why. I'm working hard to overcome this. I know it's not a pretty picture, but it's one I had to take.Related content
Comments: 129
Thank you so much! My dermatillomania (now called excoriation disorder) fluctuates with my health and anxiety levels so I've had good times and bad times. Luckily, it stays confined to my legs. Am I considered a model if I only model for myself?
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Meg,
I had thought to inquire regarding your dermatollomania (or excoriation disorder as it is now called) so I went to take a look at this to see if there were any updated comments.Β I am happy to see that you do have good times as far as this is concerned.Β The thoughts I had expessed below still hold true.
I had never faved this, as it didn't seem right to me at the time. Perhaps I was being overly sensitive.Β I do so now in honor of your courage and perseverance. 
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Well Meg -
I suppose it's relatively good that it is confined to your legs.Β Naturally, I'm pulling for you in overcoming the condition.
And of course you're a model, even if you're doing it for yourself. 
R
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Meghan,
You're always welcome, dear.
R
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You have allot of strength to post this, I constantly cover everything and dont let it show. I dont even like seeing it myself.Β
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I know it's difficult. It was a hard picture to put up. But I think the more you avoid looking, the more power it has over you. Own the scars. Know them as a part of yourself and then put them behind you.
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Meg,
I have been away from DA for some time.Β You were one of the first young artists I admired and followed.Β Now that I have started writing, and posting to DA for feedback, I noticed that my ModelMeg2003 folder was empty.Β So here I am, going through your gallery to fill my folder back up when I came across this.Β
I always knew you were a beautiful and talented young woman.Β And now, I can add brave.Β But as far as I am concerned, you have no need to feel shame over this.Β True beauty is not measured by exterior looks alone, although yours are quite striking.Β Your inner beauty shines through in everything you do.
God bless you and give you the strength to persevere in your struggle against this malady.Β You have my prayers, support, and love.
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This means so much to me. Thank you.
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My legs have always been like this, even before I started picking. That's what made me start in the first place. For most of my life I've never been able to show them in public. This is incredibly strong.Β
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stay strong. I also have this disorder. It's difficult but I was able to overcome it and you will to.
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I admire you so much for posting this. I wouldn't have been brave enough to do that. I have dermatillomania too so pick my scalp and gums. You're so beautiful, inside and out. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
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What a lovely comment. Thank you. Best of luck with your dermatillomania.
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I don't think you credit yourself enough. I think you're pretty. It didn't pay any notice until I read your description
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That's really lovely, thank you!
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you are so beautiful. and i don't only mean physically, but just... you're a beautiful person, cliche as it sounds, for sharing this.
i have always believed that everyone is pretty and i never understood how people can be so cruel, call each other fat, point out physical intricacies and say they're ugly because they are discrepancies. aesthetically pleasing? maybe not. but that does not make an identity ugly.
my sister used to tease me about my stomach, where the hair was minutely darker than the skin. looking back i realize it wasn't even noticeable; unfortunately, i took the initiative to shave that hair off, just as mothers tell their children not to. i now have a mass of scars extending from my navel down to my pelvis, and i will not let anyone see me without a shirt. when i look in the mirror it makes me want to throw up. fortunately, i am about to turn 18 - i plan to tattoo over the scars. that almost makes me sicker, knowing how ashamed i am of my body.
i can only imagine how much it took out of you to share this photo with a world of strangers. i know it would damn near kill me.
as i said, you are beautiful.
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This is one of the best comments I have ever gotten. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I truly hope you will find acceptance in your body.
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Aww, thank you!
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I'm struggling through dermatillomania too. I have it all over my arms, and sometimes people ask me what happened, and i get embarrassed and ashamed. I want to stop and try to heal, but it's going to be hard because its so addicting. Thank you for sharing this, its hard letting people know, but you're very brave to show people what you're going through. Best of luck to you and hopefully things will turn out better
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Thank you so much for this. *huuugs*
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You're very welcome *hug*
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ur really brave for posting this, ive got the same thing... my hands are nasty with scars, and my legs too. i started only wearing jeans so i couldnt touch my legs anymore, but during summer it gets too hot, and i keep scratching at them. my upper arms too, so id wear long sleeves, and id pick at my neck and scalp (a lot of blood) it is so annoying...
i feel your pain.
and by the way, i think you're beautiful.
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Oh sweetie, thank you so much for the compliment. I truly, truly hope that you get some relief. It's a really terrible thing to have to deal with.
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This is great. As someone who also has dermatillomania, I can understand the anxiety and shame that is felt with something like this. I also understand the courage it can take to post this image. I love the tone and the honesty of the entire piece; it's very nicely done. As for it not being a pretty picture, I think it's lovely and that there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. Keep strong, girl. <3
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What a lovely comment. I wish you all the best of luck in dealing with your dermatillomania.
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Thank you, and all the best to you, too.
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It is quite the courageous photograph to take, and then to share is a whole other story. It's a beautiful, sad photograph. I understand your struggle and know that you are not alone in this, not alone at all.
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Thank you so much.
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I'm sorry to hear that and I truly hope things will get better for you.
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This image has been shared on my website. Please follow the link below to see where itβs been reposted and for additional feedback on this piece: [link]
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That's really lovely! Thank you. I've liked your page.
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Aww, thank you very much!
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I have it also. Going on fifteen years of uncontrollable frenzies, eating off the bottoms of my feet, toenails and fingernails, and later picking at my face, chest, back, shoulders and legs. I remember dreading every field trip to public swimming pools when I was a kid, and avoiding sober sexual encounters as I got older. I was looking for some artistic representations of this disorder, as a potentially more productive method of emotional relief. Your photo struck me because it is true to the incredible shame that only sets in after the fact; I've experienced the same naked moments, curled in fetal position and just trying to remember to breathe. I'm really impressed by your courage. I hope it gives you strength to get better and I'll try, too.
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Oh sweetie! I truly, truly wish you all the best. I understand your pain and frustration. I'll send good vibes and big hugs your way.
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