HOME | DD

MonocerosArts — Adoption: Someone Else's Problem?

#adopt #adopted #adopting #adoption #animal #animals #cartoon #cartoons #child #children #fluffy #grace #hall #kid #kids
Published: 2016-05-24 21:37:19 +0000 UTC; Views: 6602; Favourites: 59; Downloads: 7
Redirect to original
Description


While there is nothing wrong with having biological children, many, if not most, people view adoption as nothing more than a backup plan should “typical methods” of having children fail. Of course if you do not want children at all or you aren't ready for children yet, don't adopt (that's just common sense), but obviously millions of families everywhere want children and many of them are fully capable of adopting, so why are so few of these potential families adopting? In essence, most people think of raising kids as what’s in it for them as parents (happiness, passing on genes, etc.) not about helping a child. Babies are viewed as status symbols. Most people would rather turn their back on a homeless child in favor of making a new child. When confronted, most people respond with predictable and shallow excuses such as “it’s too expensive” (even though DSS is free, and when adopting from somewhere else you don’t know the price until you’ve personally looked into doing it yourself), “adoptive children can have mental difficulties” (even though biological children can have mental difficulties, too),  and the age-old “Christian” excuse: “not everyone is called to adopt,” which doesn’t make sense, because everyone is called to help children inside the womb, so why should we turn our backs on them once they’re outside the womb? Also, I must mention: Christians who use the “not called” excuse are basically saying that almost everyone is being specifically called to not adopt, which doesn’t make sense. While of course not everyone is called to adopt, anti-adoption Christians use the “not called” excuse to explain away why almost no families ever choose to even look into adoption. So basically, the “not called” excuse is a fallacy. While the words they’re saying are technically correct, they’re using those words to justify a shocking lack of compassion. They know you can’t argue with the words, but what they’re using those words to justify is sick and twisted. Many, many pregnant mothers who choose to abort do so because they do not want their child to end up in the adoption system. No respectable pro-lifer should turn away from those deaths without a very, very good reason.

What it means to consider adoption: 
www.deviantart.com/art/Conside…

This is part of my series of comics featuring cute animals to address common excuses that people use to justify their lack of compassion toward homeless children.

1) Have you considered adoption at all / is adoption too expensive: the-cynical-unicorn.deviantart…
2) Adopting vs. breeding / the consequences of sex: the-cynical-unicorn.deviantart…
3) Who is called to adopt? the-cynical-unicorn.deviantart…
4) Adoption: Someone else's problem? the-cynical-unicorn.deviantart…
5) God adopted: the-cynical-unicorn.deviantart…
6) The public's response to adoption advocates: the-cynical-unicorn.deviantart…
7) Adoption is pro-family and NOT anti-sex: unicornarama.deviantart.com/ar…
8) Are adoption advocates being judgmental? unicornarama.deviantart.com/ar…
9) Red tape: unicornarama.deviantart.com/ar…
10) Does having children give you immortality? unicornarama.deviantart.com/ar…
11) Children are gifts from the Lord: Gifts From God


______________________________________________________________________






"Somebody else will do it."
Just recently, I traveled to see family in another state and go to a wedding. It was a Catholic wedding, so about halfway through, a man went up and read the Prayer of the Faithful, which, in this particular version, had these words in it: "For the poor, the homeless and the unemployed, and for all who suffer under persecution, let us pray to the Lord: Lord hear our prayer." That's a wonderful thing to pray. It acknowledges that there are many men, women, and children who go hungry and without homes or family. If my cousin had this said at his wedding, I thought, that means he's interested in helping those people. Seeing as he and his new wife told me they were looking forward to having a family of their own, maybe they'd adopt a child or two!

Unfortunately, as I was talking to another cousin and an aunt later that week, I heard that the new couple was planning their honeymoon on a tropical island, and that they had searched long and hard to find an island that didn't have the Zika virus. For those who don't know, Zika poses no threat to two healthy adults such as my cousin and his wife. The only reason they'd work hard to avoid it would be if they were planning to get pregnant within a year. My suspicions were backed up later when my cousin told me they were planning to have babies, and not to adopt. After that beautiful prayer at their wedding, my cousin and his wife were deliberately turning their backs on they very people they had "prayed" for. In essence, they might have cared about orphans and homeless children, but they expected somebody else to adopt them. They were sacrificing the well-being of existing children so that they might have theoretical future children. They were sacrificing these homeless children on the altar of their personal biological instincts.

That was a real wake-up call for me. This kind of apathy toward homeless children is all too common throughout the world. People don't want orphans to suffer, but they don't think of them as their responsibility. People everywhere think of orphans as somebody else's problem. Out of sight, out of mind. This is why it's so important that we show the world that adoption, foster care, and the like is everyone's responsibility. Everyone should at least try to help. As one of my friends told me: "Children need homes. Some people have homes and want children. The obvious conclusion: open your home to those children." We need to be a counter-cultural revolution to show the world that adoption is not just for "someone else." If we do nothing, the problems of overfull orphanages and foster cares, rising crime, prostitution, overpopulation, teen pregnancy, and everything related to poor upbringing will only become worse. Eventually it will reach the point where it will be everyone's problem, whether or not we want it. The best and most compassionate thing to do, both for the children and for our society as a whole, is to adopt these children and give them homes, love, parenting, and family.

Only when the world wakes up and realizes that adoption is not just for "someone else" will we start to see a turn for the better.







One thing I feel I must mention is how people think of parenthood as what’s in it for them. "I want a big family, I want a biological baby, I don’t want to deal with mental or physical disabilities, I want adorable offspring, I want to see myself in my child's features, I want to feel a kid squirm around in my uterus, I want to experience birth, I want to play with my wife's pregnant belly, I want to bang my wife every night, I don’t like birth control, I want to watch my children grow from babies to adults, I don’t want court dates for adoption, I don’t want to spend any money unless it's a hospital fee for a birth, I want this, I want that, I, I, I, I, I!" Has anyone stopped to think about what the children want? Have people ever stopped to realize that parenthood is actually not about the parents? Parenthood is supposed to be a loving sacrifice for the CHILDREN. When did people become so self-centered that they forgot that?

Then there are the Christians who want to have biological babies to "share the Gospel with the next generation." Do you see the error in their reasoning? Sharing the Gospel is about helping people come to Christ and be saved. But here's the catch: there are millions of homeless children who need the Gospel, but these "Christians" would rather make a new child and share the Gospel with him/her rather than share the Gospel with a homeless child. See their logic? "You're not my blood, so it’s not my problem if you go to Hell." They'd rather make one rather than help one who already exists go to Heaven. I don't know about you, but that doesn't strike me as a very Christ-like attitude.


I personally believe couples who want children should have 1-2 of their own, maybe 3, (if they want their own children), but after that point, they have already replaced themselves in the population and passed on their genes, so if they want to add more children to their families, then they need to look into adopting. There’s really no excuse. If they qualify and want more children past their population replacement number, and there are children who need families, there’s no excuse. Considering how many couples each year have a 4th or more baby, and the fact that there are more babies born through IVF in the US each year than there are children eligible for adoption in the US, it’s clear that the only reason these children don’t have homes is because people don’t want to help them. There are more than enough qualifying families, and more than enough couples who are desperate to add children to their families. People just don’t want those children. If you have two children already and want more, or if you want children in general, consider adopting.

Related content
Comments: 75

MonocerosArts In reply to ??? [2016-05-25 20:44:16 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! Well, not everyone is suited to raise a kid, biological or not. Especially if you're still in school, now is probably not the best time!

But like you said, there are numerous couples and families who want more kids, or just want A kid, and there are millions of kids who need homes. The logical thing to do is try to open your home to them.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Rogue-Ranger In reply to MonocerosArts [2016-05-26 06:40:19 +0000 UTC]

If everyone did what was logical, it wouldn't be an issue.

On the topic of adoption, I'm making a pro-adoption stamp and was wondering if I can link to any of your art or journals on adoption in the description for further reading, since you've compiled so much information already and it would be less work for me if I don't have to redo what you've already done?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to Rogue-Ranger [2016-05-26 14:25:31 +0000 UTC]

Yes. There are more infertile families in the U.S. alone than there are children all over the world who need adoption. A lot of foreign adoption agencies are corrupt and demand more money than people can pay, though. That's incredibly frustrating. But there are still hordes of kids in the U.S.'s DSS system (which is free to adopt from), and other U.S. systems, so cost is not the issue.

Sure, that's fine! I need to reread my two stamps on adoption and make sure they're up-to-date with good reasoning and all. The comics and journals are probably best, because they deal with specific excuses.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Rogue-Ranger In reply to MonocerosArts [2016-05-27 20:18:17 +0000 UTC]

Ah, I didn't add that there are more infertile families than children needing adoption... Well, here's the draft. I may tweak the description and the stamp design, but you can see where I put the links to your art: sta.sh/0eycearjz5i

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to Rogue-Ranger [2016-05-27 22:06:22 +0000 UTC]

That's really good! I think you hit it right on. The only thing I would change was a grammatical error in the stamp itself: "I'd rather give a child my love than give a child my genes." (no to give) But other than that, I think it's great! I like how you mentioned how conflicted it makes us feel to see "loving" families who consciously choose not to adopt.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

Rogue-Ranger In reply to MonocerosArts [2016-05-28 10:31:46 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much! It's a good thing I asked for your thoughts and I'll fix the grammar and have it up soon.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to Rogue-Ranger [2016-05-30 04:43:14 +0000 UTC]

Okay!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Little-rolling-bean In reply to ??? [2016-05-25 02:03:36 +0000 UTC]

I love you

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to Little-rolling-bean [2016-05-25 18:46:25 +0000 UTC]

Thanks!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

J-Yoshi64 In reply to ??? [2016-05-24 23:51:34 +0000 UTC]

Calvin's parents once said, "Unfortunately, we're all someone else to someone else."
Thank you, Bill Watterson.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to J-Yoshi64 [2016-05-25 18:43:14 +0000 UTC]

Yes! That quote popped into my mind while making this. I thought about including it. I might, I don't know.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

J-Yoshi64 In reply to MonocerosArts [2016-05-25 19:09:20 +0000 UTC]

It's one of my favorites. It just hits home so hard. I wish people would realize it more.

Another favorite quote from him (regarding the Duplicator arc, but not actual in-comic dialogue) is "I think we all would be horrified to meet a double of ourselves and find out what everybody else already knows about us."

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to J-Yoshi64 [2016-05-25 20:40:12 +0000 UTC]

Lol, so true!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

J-Yoshi64 In reply to MonocerosArts [2016-05-25 22:00:49 +0000 UTC]

Although it'd be a great learning experience. You could find out what flaws you have and try to fix them.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Coron-Whiteback In reply to ??? [2016-05-24 23:08:43 +0000 UTC]

To be brutally honest, I would probably adopt before actually conceiving a child. Mainly because I am afraid something would go wrong if I tried to make a child myself :/.
I just don't understand why people see adoption as such a negative thing. I mean, it's actually good? You're actually helping these children live happy lives, what's so bad about that?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to Coron-Whiteback [2016-05-25 18:42:41 +0000 UTC]

That's exactly how I feel. I have a problem called Vasovagal syncope that causes my blood pressure to drop to the point where I can lose consciousnesses if I get over-triggered by certain things. Usually it's not a big problem, but I get triggered by bodily things. I don't even know if I could have sex without passing out (I had to lie down after reading tampon instructions; I didn't even get the thing in), so the idea of all the bodily "stuff" that happens during birth... I just don't know if I'd make it through the process. If your blood pressure is too low for too long, you can suffer brain damage.

And then there's the whole issue of the morality of breeding when there are children who need help!

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Dragonlord-Daegen In reply to ??? [2016-05-24 22:30:47 +0000 UTC]

tho i know for a fact that i whould problubly make a lousy parent (that is why i don't intend on having children),if i DO decide of having children sometime in my life,i made up my mind that i would rather adopt...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to Dragonlord-Daegen [2016-05-24 22:52:57 +0000 UTC]

Same here! I really can't see myself being a great mom, but if one day I do decide to have kids, I definitely want at least one to be adopted. I feel called to adopt a 4 to 10 year old. Maybe when I'm in my 40s I'll be comfortable with the idea of a teenager, but right now I'd be too close in age.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

thormemeson In reply to ??? [2016-05-24 21:49:35 +0000 UTC]

Someone else is ME! I am going to adopt and if any woman I date is against that its over.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to thormemeson [2016-05-24 22:57:04 +0000 UTC]

Yep! Most women are fine with adoption if the husband is fine with it. Just of course make sure you are ready to raise a kid before adopting, but that's kind of obvious.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

thormemeson In reply to MonocerosArts [2016-05-24 23:24:28 +0000 UTC]

true

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

LumeraLightstar In reply to ??? [2016-05-24 21:48:08 +0000 UTC]

I hate the someone else will do it excuse. 

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

MonocerosArts In reply to LumeraLightstar [2016-05-24 22:57:48 +0000 UTC]

No one ever actually says it's someone else's problem, they just imply it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

LumeraLightstar In reply to MonocerosArts [2016-05-25 05:38:43 +0000 UTC]

Wow. That is just as bad though.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0


<= Prev |