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Description
EEENT.
EEENT.
EEENT.
Monger has some issues to work out. Honestly. It... is 6 am. Who is up right now? Old ladies out for their jog, high school kids, hard-working parents, and me. Guess who doesn't fit in.
Ding ding ding.
EEENT.
EEENT.
EEENT.
We have a winner.
I decide, this morning, not to fight the day, but embrace it. Maybe even seize it... Nah, that's going too far. I'll probably just give it a feeble high five, then crawl back into bed.
My eyes slide open, crusty with sleep. I-- Wait. Something's off. The first thing I notice is the creepy breeze drifting over my collar bone and shoulders. I went to sleep naked...? A shudder runs through my bare body. I grab my glasses from the shelf as I get out of bed, tucking my comforter under my arms. The next thing I notice is the thing I'm pulling the blanket off of. I trip backwards into the wall at the sight. Oh-- oh my God.
It's Link.
The conclusion my brain comes to when it adds my falling sleep naked with Link laying there, looking almost smug, sends it spiralling into a state of denial.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
A wave of nausea rolls into my throat. I slap a hand over my mouth to stop myself from throwing up, but it isn't vomit that wants out, it's a scream. I let it out. It echoes high and shrill throughout my cell.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"
Link wakes with a start, nearly falling off my bed. "Wha-? Huh?" he gibbers. He spots me. "Jenn, what are you doing?"
I stare at him, sinking to the floor. "What are you doing in my bed?!" My voice is high with panic.
Of course, I already know the answer. I just don't wanna believe it.
My best friend looks awkward. "Uh..."
"Did we have sex?"
I start inching across the wall to grab my hat. Link reacts and scoops it up. He tosses it to me, but I don't put it on. Again, I know the answer, but I'm hoping to hear otherwise.
Link hesitates, sitting back down on my bed.
Oh...
He nods.
"Aaaahhoh, my God. Why did we have sex?!" I shriek.
Link looks frantic. "Because you told me you weren't drunk!"
"Well obviously I was drunk! Not that you aren't cool and everything, but I don't remember anything, so OBVIOUSLY!" Suddenly, a possibility dawns on me.
"Well, maybe I took advantage of you!"
I scream again.
"Sorry," he says, moving towards me.
"AAAHH!" I scuttle further into the corner. "You raped me!"
Link flinches, looking hurt. "You-you can't rape the willing."
"OH MY GOD."
"I'm sorry."
He's sorry.
"I was drunk, too!" he reasons.
"Did... we at least use a condom?"
"Where would we have gotten condoms?!"
"AAAAAAAHHH!"
"Stop screaming!"
"I'm sorry, it's just-- AAHHH!" Another possibility comes forth.
"God, Jenn!"
"What if I'm pregnant?" I squeak.
Link looks at the floor, then slowly makes eye contact with me again. We both know that would be an unpleasant circumstance. Awkward babies. I jump to my feet at the same time he does, racing for the button to open the cell door. We both pound on it. Centuries later, the door begins to lift. Why is it so slow?! We slide under the rising steel as soon as we can, then sprint for the tables, where everyone sits, waiting calmly for breakfast.
"Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc!" we yell.
I realize then what an odd sight this must be: the two of us emerging from the same cell, running towards the others, naked. Well, I'm not, I still have my blanket. Link, on the other hand, is shameless and lets it all hang out.
I can't even look at him.
Dr. Cockroach only sees us for a second before choking on a hunk of slipper. "I say," he splutters in his accent. "What-? What have you two been up to?!"
I crash into him, grabbing the side of his head to half-yell the story into the place where his ear should be. I step back, and give him a pleading look. He understands. Susan leans down from her table.
"Doctor, what's up?" she says in a stage whisper.
He stands on tiptoe and quickly relays the information to her.
"Come on, BOB," she says loudly, standing up stiffly. "Let's go play cards."
BOB trails after her obediently. "Hey, what's goin--?"
"LET'S PLAY CARDS, BOB."
Insecto screeches and hobbles after them, uninterested in our little drama.
I look back at Doc. "Do you have, like, a morning-after pill, or something...?" I beg.
The doctor steps closer, between us. "Did you pair not use, er..." He leans in even closer. "Protection?" My face is so red right now.
We both shake our heads. "Apparently not," I say. I'm really doing my best not to glare at Link.
"Hey," Link says, offended, "Maybe if you hadn't gotten completely wasted, we would've thought to ask!"
"IF I WASN'T SO WASTED I WOULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITH YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!"
"Ouch," Doc comments. His antennae fall back.
Link folds his arms, turning away from us. "Yeah, really...," he grumbles.
"Oh..." I toss my hands through my hair, sex hair, then pull my hat over my head. "Link..." I go to grab his shoulder.
He shrugs away.
Oh, crap. I crossed a line.
"Link," I insist. You're my best friend.
"I'm gonna go lift something," he mutters, slouching off.
Part of me wants to follow him, but Doc's skinny hand holds me back. Another part knows that Link's cell is underwater, so I'd just drown. I watch him go, frowning.
Why is he so upset?
"Doc--?"
"Jennica," he says quietly, prompting me to sit on the floor with him. I do so carefully, covering myself with my blanket as I cross my legs. "Did it ever occur to you that perhaps Link may care about you, a great deal?"
I understand exactly what he's saying. I shake my head, no. I hadn't, really.
Dr. Cockroach gives me a look. "Do you still want to talk to him?"
That's a good question. Do I? I duck my head in thought. If I don't it'll drive me crazy with guilt. BOB will ask awkward questions. The other two will want me to talk to them instead, which would solve nothing.
On the other hand.
Do I want to face this inevitable conversation with Link, my friend since day one? Uhm.
Kind of.
I look back up at Doc and nod feverishly. The smile that crosses he face makes me uncomfortable, as though this is supposed to end with Link sweeping me up and blasting through the skylight, then, I guess, through the metre of sand covering it.
The skylight's kind of pointless if you think about it.
I really hadn't thought about it that way until Doc brought it up. More common sense than obliviousness. Humans reproduce with other humans, right? And Link? Not human. Primate (sort of), but not human. And that's why we're friends. Sort of.
I hesitate before knocking on the door of Link's cell. Do I really want to do this, right now?
Yeah.
...Maybe I should get dressed first, I think, scurrying back to my cell. I shoot Doc an annoyed, head-shaking, narrow eyed look in reponse to his amused smile. Inside, I quickly pull on my underwear, then my grey shoes and my grey sweat pants. I button up my grey shirt, then roll up the grey sleeves as I wait for the door to slide open. I look like a springy, grey blob. With pink features. Jeez.
Anyways, I jog over to Link's door and knock anxiously. Seconds tick by, and suddenly there's an awkward sound. Like water... draining... Oh right.
Ok then, maybe I won't drown. Ohh, darn.

Description
EEENT.
EEENT.
EEENT.
Monger has some issues to work out. Honestly. It... is 6 am. Who is up right now? Old ladies out for their jog, high school kids, hard-working parents, and me. Guess who doesn't fit in.
Ding ding ding.
EEENT.
EEENT.
EEENT.
We have a winner.
I decide, this morning, not to fight the day, but embrace it. Maybe even seize it... Nah, that's going too far. I'll probably just give it a feeble high five, then crawl back into bed.
My eyes slide open, crusty with sleep. I-- Wait. Something's off. The first thing I notice is the creepy breeze drifting over my collar bone and shoulders. I went to sleep naked...? A shudder runs through my bare body. I grab my glasses from the shelf as I get out of bed, tucking my comforter under my arms. The next thing I notice is the thing I'm pulling the blanket off of. I trip backwards into the wall at the sight. Oh-- oh my God.
It's Link.
The conclusion my brain comes to when it adds my falling sleep naked with Link laying there, looking almost smug, sends it spiralling into a state of denial.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
A wave of nausea rolls into my throat. I slap a hand over my mouth to stop myself from throwing up, but it isn't vomit that wants out, it's a scream. I let it out. It echoes high and shrill throughout my cell.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"
Link wakes with a start, nearly falling off my bed. "Wha-? Huh?" he gibbers. He spots me. "Jenn, what are you doing?"
I stare at him, sinking to the floor. "What are you doing in my bed?!" My voice is high with panic.
Of course, I already know the answer. I just don't wanna believe it.
My best friend looks awkward. "Uh..."
"Did we have sex?"
I start inching across the wall to grab my hat. Link reacts and scoops it up. He tosses it to me, but I don't put it on. Again, I know the answer, but I'm hoping to hear otherwise.
Link hesitates, sitting back down on my bed.
Oh...
He nods.
"Aaaahhoh, my God. Why did we have sex?!" I shriek.
Link looks frantic. "Because you told me you weren't drunk!"
"Well obviously I was drunk! Not that you aren't cool and everything, but I don't remember anything, so OBVIOUSLY!" Suddenly, a possibility dawns on me.
"Well, maybe I took advantage of you!"
I scream again.
"Sorry," he says, moving towards me.
"AAAHH!" I scuttle further into the corner. "You raped me!"
Link flinches, looking hurt. "You-you can't rape the willing."
"OH MY GOD."
"I'm sorry."
He's sorry.
"I was drunk, too!" he reasons.
"Did... we at least use a condom?"
"Where would we have gotten condoms?!"
"AAAAAAAHHH!"
"Stop screaming!"
"I'm sorry, it's just-- AAHHH!" Another possibility comes forth.
"God, Jenn!"
"What if I'm pregnant?" I squeak.
Link looks at the floor, then slowly makes eye contact with me again. We both know that would be an unpleasant circumstance. Awkward babies. I jump to my feet at the same time he does, racing for the button to open the cell door. We both pound on it. Centuries later, the door begins to lift. Why is it so slow?! We slide under the rising steel as soon as we can, then sprint for the tables, where everyone sits, waiting calmly for breakfast.
"Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc, Doc!" we yell.
I realize then what an odd sight this must be: the two of us emerging from the same cell, running towards the others, naked. Well, I'm not, I still have my blanket. Link, on the other hand, is shameless and lets it all hang out.
I can't even look at him.
Dr. Cockroach only sees us for a second before choking on a hunk of slipper. "I say," he splutters in his accent. "What-? What have you two been up to?!"
I crash into him, grabbing the side of his head to half-yell the story into the place where his ear should be. I step back, and give him a pleading look. He understands. Susan leans down from her table.
"Doctor, what's up?" she says in a stage whisper.
He stands on tiptoe and quickly relays the information to her.
"Come on, BOB," she says loudly, standing up stiffly. "Let's go play cards."
BOB trails after her obediently. "Hey, what's goin--?"
"LET'S PLAY CARDS, BOB."
Insecto screeches and hobbles after them, uninterested in our little drama.
I look back at Doc. "Do you have, like, a morning-after pill, or something...?" I beg.
The doctor steps closer, between us. "Did you pair not use, er..." He leans in even closer. "Protection?" My face is so red right now.
We both shake our heads. "Apparently not," I say. I'm really doing my best not to glare at Link.
"Hey," Link says, offended, "Maybe if you hadn't gotten completely wasted, we would've thought to ask!"
"IF I WASN'T SO WASTED I WOULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITH YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!"
"Ouch," Doc comments. His antennae fall back.
Link folds his arms, turning away from us. "Yeah, really...," he grumbles.
"Oh..." I toss my hands through my hair, sex hair, then pull my hat over my head. "Link..." I go to grab his shoulder.
He shrugs away.
Oh, crap. I crossed a line.
"Link," I insist. You're my best friend.
"I'm gonna go lift something," he mutters, slouching off.
Part of me wants to follow him, but Doc's skinny hand holds me back. Another part knows that Link's cell is underwater, so I'd just drown. I watch him go, frowning.
Why is he so upset?
"Doc--?"
"Jennica," he says quietly, prompting me to sit on the floor with him. I do so carefully, covering myself with my blanket as I cross my legs. "Did it ever occur to you that perhaps Link may care about you, a great deal?"
I understand exactly what he's saying. I shake my head, no. I hadn't, really.
Dr. Cockroach gives me a look. "Do you still want to talk to him?"
That's a good question. Do I? I duck my head in thought. If I don't it'll drive me crazy with guilt. BOB will ask awkward questions. The other two will want me to talk to them instead, which would solve nothing.
On the other hand.
Do I want to face this inevitable conversation with Link, my friend since day one? Uhm.
Kind of.
I look back up at Doc and nod feverishly. The smile that crosses he face makes me uncomfortable, as though this is supposed to end with Link sweeping me up and blasting through the skylight, then, I guess, through the metre of sand covering it.
The skylight's kind of pointless if you think about it.
I really hadn't thought about it that way until Doc brought it up. More common sense than obliviousness. Humans reproduce with other humans, right? And Link? Not human. Primate (sort of), but not human. And that's why we're friends. Sort of.
I hesitate before knocking on the door of Link's cell. Do I really want to do this, right now?
Yeah.
...Maybe I should get dressed first, I think, scurrying back to my cell. I shoot Doc an annoyed, head-shaking, narrow eyed look in reponse to his amused smile. Inside, I quickly pull on my underwear, then my grey shoes and my grey sweat pants. I button up my grey shirt, then roll up the grey sleeves as I wait for the door to slide open. I look like a springy, grey blob. With pink features. Jeez.
Anyways, I jog over to Link's door and knock anxiously. Seconds tick by, and suddenly there's an awkward sound. Like water... draining... Oh right.
Ok then, maybe I won't drown. Ohh, darn.