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8

Setting: The Coffee Shop
Date: October 24th, 2013
Time: 10:33 AM PST
(Point of View: Stompin’ Bob)

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Something hit the back of my head. It was small. I slowly turned around. My girlfriend stood across the room by a table, and on the table was a bowl of candy corn. She was wearing a maroon scarf, plain white t-shirt, and jeans. She looked away innocently. I grinned, winking and turning back around.

“I’m being attacked by candy corns,” I commented as I sat on the couch.
“Er, okay,” Franky said. He held up his apple cider donut. “I have food.”
“Me, too.” I reached onto the platter sitting on the table in front of me. “Or... I’m about to.” For a few seconds, my flipper hovered over the platter. Then I took a cinnamon one off of it and sat back, taking a huge bite.
Franky looked at me for a few seconds, then burst out laughing. “Stomp.”
I swallowed. “What?”
“Your cheeks were puffed-up, you looked like a... like a...” He bit the bottom of his beak. “I can’t remember what they’re called.”
“A squirrel?” I asked, taking another bite.
“Yeah!! Yeah, a squirrel.” He sipped his cup of coffee.
“Guys!!! Guys. Guys.” Someone was approaching us. The crowd of penguins in the Coffee Shop was pretty big, so it was hard to tell where the voice was coming from.
“What?” Franky said.
“Have you seen these hats?” exclaimed a very excited-looking Petey K as he pushed his way through the crowd and over to us. He had one of the rainbow party hats on his head, and behind him, G-Billy had taken his maroon beanie and was wearing it along with his red bandana.
“Yeah,” I said, nodding.
“They’re so awesome!!”
“Congratulations,” I said, grinning.
“I’m going to wear this all day,” he announced. “It’s the best hat ever.”
“Even better than that sparkly beanie from home?” G-Billy asked, putting his flippers on Petey’s shoulders.
“No, but almost,” he replied.
G-Billy grinned. “I need some food.”
“There's donuts there,” I said, pointing to the tray on the table.
“Ooh, donuts.” He waddled in front of Petey K and took a pumpkin donut off the tray. “Is there some kind of drink here...?”
“It’s five o’clock somewhere,” Petey replied.
“I meant coffee,” he said, rolling his eyes and pretend-shoving Petey.
“Well, it’s still five o’clock somewhere.”
“You’re crazy. Come with me, we’re going to get coffee.”
“Okay.” He let him pull him away by the flipper.
“He’s very excited about that hat,” I said.
“For sure,” Franky said. “Hey, question. Have you, um, seen my wife?”
“Oh, she died,” I said, in a completely casual voice.
Franky’s eyes widened. “What?”
“Franky, you really need a lesson in sarcasm.”
“Yeah, I do.... so anyway, where is she?”
“I think she’s... um... yeah, I really don’t know.”
“I’m gonna go find her... but I’ll be back, okay?”
“Okay. Don’t die. Don’t get lost.”
“I won’t,” he said, grinning and waddling into the crowd.
I sighed. “Forever alone.”
For a few minutes, I sat there eating my cinnamon donut. Then a familiar penguin sat down next to me.

“Hey,” I said.
“Hiya,” PH replied.
“You attacked me with candy corn.”
“Indeed I did.”
“Why?”
“Because I was trying to get your attention. You proceeded to ignore me.”
I rolled my eyes, smiling. “I didn’t ignore you.”
“What’s this?” She reached for my donut. “Care to share?”
“Don’t eat it all,” I replied, giving it to her.
She nibbled on it. “Mmm. Where’d ya get this?”
“There,” I said, pointing to the tray for what felt like the millionth time.
“Aha. Let me in on that,” she said, taking one of the donuts.
“They’re good, huh?”
“Yeah. Who made em’?”
“They’re from here.” I gestured to the Coffee Shop desk across the room.
“Oh, right.” She gave me my donut, then took a bite of hers. “Got your speech?”
“It’s in my pocket.”
“Can I read it?”
“No.”
“Whyyyy? First you stay up on your laptop until some ridiculous hour at night, then when you finally decide to go to bed, you wake me up in the process, and you won’t even let me read what you were typing?”
“Yep.”
“How come?” She tugged on my right bicep.
“Because that’s the kind of inconvenient penguin I am.” I smiled.
“So, so true.”
“By the way, I was up until 11:45.”
“Jeez. No wonder I’m so tired.”
“You weren’t even awake. You were half-awake.”
“If I remember it, that means I was awake.”
“No matter how much you argue, you’re not going to get to read the speech.”
“Why nooooottttttt?”
“Shush.”
“Please.”
“No.”
“PLEASE??”
“No.” I finished off my donut, then turned to her on the couch.
She smirked. “But I’m the best girlfriend in the whole universe and you love me more than anything in the whole wide world, right?”
“Shut up,” I said, blushing. When she wants something, she tends to quote me from times when I'm feeling really deep.
"C'mon, bubby. Please?"
"Just wait a few hours, okay?"
She sighed into a kiss. I jumped.

"Don't do that," I muttered.
"Why not?"
"Because there are so many penguins here, and they're all stalkers."
She smiled slyly. "Come with me."
"Wh-- Where are we going?"
She got up and started waddling through the crowd.
"PH?" I followed her. She was heading for the stairs. "Wait up."

She headed up to the Book Room. I sighed, crossing my flippers. I stood at the bottom of the stairs for a minute before running up after her.

"Remind me why we're up here?" I asked, stepping into the quiet room.
"Honestly, I dunno." She held out her flippers. "I'd like a kiss, though."
I took her by the waist, rolling my eyes. "You came all the way up here with me just for this?"
"Yes, because I know ya won't kiss me in public."
"Not true."
"True." She grinned.
"You really think that?"
"Actually, yes, I do."
I sighed for a second. "It's just I thought you don't want publicity."
"After that song, what's the point?"
I frowned. Over the summer, I wrote and released a song about PH. After that, it was clear that I had a girlfriend, but nobody really knows that that girl is PH. "I guess, but I never went out and said 'this is the girl I wrote the song for'...."
"Shush." She put her flippers on the top of my head. I leaned forward and let her fall back. She shifted nervously.
"I gotcha," I said, kissing the top of her head.
"What time do we have to be at the Stage?"
"11:30...."
"Okay."
I fiddled with the scarf around her neck. "I like this."
"Hm?"
"I like your outfit."
"I woke up so late, I just threw together the first things I saw."
I rubbed my flipper on her waist. "Maybe you should do that more often."
"Have you been drinking? What was in your coffee?"
"Coffee. No, I haven't. Why do you always accuse me of drinking? It's 11 in the morning."
She giggled. "I'm joking, mate."
"I've been degraded to 'mate' again. What did I do this time?"
Now she was laughing for real. "It's a habit!!"
"Let's go downstairs."
"Let's not." She pushed my hair out of my face and kissed me slowly. I put my flippers on her head-- and forgot that I had been holding her up. We tumbled to the ground.

"Oof!" she cried as I landed on top of her.
"Sorry," I said, going red. "I forgot I was your support."
"That's alright."

Someone was coming up. I cursed under my breath and rolled over, sitting up. PH propped herself up on her flipper and re-tied her scarf, which had come off when we fell.

"EW, get a room," Rookie said as he reached the top of the stairs.
"One, it's not what it looks like. Two, we did get a room and you decided to come stalk us in our room," I pointed out, standing up.
He rolled his eyes, waddling over to the bookshelf and taking out last year's yearbook. "Sure it's not what it looks like."
"We fell over," PH explained.
"Sureeee." He waddled back to the stairs and left.

"Okay, let's go back down there," I said.
"Okay, fine." She sighed. I got up, and pulled her up by the flipper.

We went downstairs, and eventually parted ways because she was pulled aside by Dot. I returned to my couch. To my displeasure, all the donuts were gone.
“Who took all the donuts?” I asked, but nobody really heard me. I shrugged, taking the folded piece of paper with my speech on it out of my pocket.

Every Anniversary since 2008, I’ve been giving a speech. I used to write for the Club Penguin Times, but once I joined the band, I just didn’t have time anymore. Aunt Arctic always asks me to write a speech summarizing the year and give it on the 24th at the Stage. They show a slideshow and a video there, too. It’s all part of the Anniversary Party rituals.

Basically, everyone gathers in the Coffee Shop that morning. All the mascots are there, and a lot of random citizens of Club Penguin as well. There’s always really good food, including cake (although we usually have that after we go to the Stage). We look at the Yearbooks, and sign each other’s books, and so on. Near noon, we all travel in a pack over to the Stage and do all that presentation stuff. The band and I usually perform, and sometimes Cadence does too. This year, I’m not sure if we’re supposed to or not. Sometimes we set up our stuff in the Town and play an outdoor show, which is what I think we’re doing today. It’s too nice out to be inside all day.

I leaned over, squinting at the small black text on the page. I need contacts or something. My eyesight’s getting bad.

Last night, I spent a really long time on this. I’m really proud of it. Aunt Arctic is supposed to find me and go over it with me, but I haven’t seen her yet. For a few minutes, I sat there all alone, then she came over to me and sat down next to me on the couch.

“Hi, Rob,” she said to me. She’s known me for a long time, so she calls me by my real name.
“Hi, AA,” I said, looking up.
“Are you okay?” she asked. She tends to be able to tell when I’m down.
“Er, yeah. I’m pretty tired, and... just... having a stressful week. I’m fine. How are you?”
“I’m doing well,” she said, nodding and smiling. She adjusted her glasses. “Are you ready?”
“What? Now?!”
“No, no. I just mean, are you ready in general.”
“Oh, yeah, I’m ready. I was up really late working on it.” I held up the papers. “Want to read it?”
“Sure.” She smiled. I gave her the three pages, and sat back. She started reading.

After she finished, she nodded and gave me back the speech. I put it in my pocket.
“It’s really good! I love it. Everyone will love it.”
“Thanks,” I said, nodding. After a few seconds, I said, “Are you doing okay?”
She shrugged. “Yes, I suppose I’m doing alright. I haven’t had a treatment in a month.”
“That’s good. Well, not good. You know what I mean.”
“I know what you mean.”
“Do you think... are you improving?”
“I hope so, but to be honest, I don’t know...”
I pat her on the back. “You’re doing awesome.”
“Thank you,” she said, smiling.
I nodded.

Neither of us talked for a minute, then she said, “Okay, we should get going over there.”
“Alright.” I got up. “Who’s going to... lead the crowd out?”
“I will.”
“Okay. I’ll see you at the Stage, then.”
“Right. See you then.”
“Bye.”
She waved and waddled towards the door.

Soon enough, we were all gathered outside the building. I was sort of alone, and looking for someone that I knew. The crowd started moving, so I did too, but I was back and forth between clusters of penguins.

Penguins could probably recognize me, but I wasn’t being approached very much. Everyone had a friend or something to talk to. I ran around in the traveling pack for a few minutes before finally spotting the blond hair under a party hat with glasses.

“Jeez, it took me forever to find you two,” I said, falling into step next to Petey K and G-Billy, who was next to him.
“Sorry. We didn’t mean to ditch,” G-Billy said.
“Sure.” I grinned. “Where’s Franky?”
“Up there,” he replied, pointing forward. Franky was waddling with Cadence a little ways in front of us.
“Oh,” I said.
“Where did you go? We came back to the couch and you were gone.”
“Oh, I was being stalked by Rookie.”
“And how does that involve leaving the couch?” Petey cut in, grinning.
“Use your brain. Girlfriend. Rookie. Book Room. Enough said.”
“Ah.” He paused. “Rookie stalks.”
“I think he legitimately stalks,” G-Billy said.
Petey K and I both laughed.
“I’ll tell him,” I said.
“No, because then he’ll stalk me... as payback...”
Petey was laughing really hard. “Why is this so funny to me?”
“I dunno,” Billy said. I shrugged.

“Man, that donut was good,” I said after a minute.
“That food was good, period.” G-Billy fixed the dual hat on his head.
“Yeah, it was.”

We all approached the Stage. “Are we all gonna fit in there?” Petey K asked.
“Yeah, we’ll fit,” I said.
“Ooh, maybe we can sit in the top things...” he remarked.
“Those are for the mods.”
“Damn.”

We all went inside the Stage. The curtain was closed and there was a podium in the middle of the stage. Petey K, G-Billy, Franky and I sat in the second row back. Around us, other mascots were sitting. The moderators got the really high seats, and everyone else sat wherever they wanted.

Spike Hike was standing onstage, and he went over to the podium. After tapping the microphone a few times, he cleared his throat and everyone kind of shut up.

“Hi, everyone,” he said into the microphone.
I waved, grinning. Everyone in the audience said some form of ‘hello’.
“Welcome to Club Penguin’s eighth anniversary,” he said, smiling. We all cheered. “I’m really excited because we have some awesome stuff to show you all today.” More cheering. “So first, we’re going to hear some reflections on the year by... where is he? Late again?”
I laughed, waving from my spot in the audience. “Not late,” I called.
“Wow. Not late. Okay, so I’m going to hand this spot over to Stompin’ Bob now.”
“Looks like I have to get up,” I muttered to the penguins around me. Franky laughed softly. I sighed, hopping up and awkwardly waddling sideways out of my row. Everyone clapped, and Spike Hike waddled over to his seat. I took a deep breath and climbed the three steps onto the stage, then stepped onto the wooden podium.

Taking my papers out of my pocket, I leaned towards the small microphone. “Hi, everyone.”

After taking a second for the crowd to quiet down, I said, “So for those of you who don’t know me, I’m Stompin’ Bob... I’m in the Penguin Band, we’re a local band and we play at a bunch of random places around the island and in other places as well.” I paused. “I’m just going to talk about the year a little.”

I looked around in the first few rows. Where’s PH?
After a few seconds, though, I spotted her. She was sitting with Dot, Rookie, and Jet Pack Guy on my right. She made a face at me, and I bit the bottom of my beak to keep from laughing.

“Sorry, guys, my friends are trying to make me laugh,” I said. “Cough, cough. Okay, here I go.”

I put the papers on the podium and took breath.

“2013.”
“This has been a year of milestones. It’s also been a year of crazy, spontaneous happenings.” I paused. “Last November, we had just finished celebrating Halloween and the whole island went on lockdown.” I grinned. “I wasn’t actually here to see this, but it sounds like it was... chaotic. Things got pretty tense, or so I heard. Thankfully, everyone over at the Phoning Facility got us out of that funk, and life went on.”

I paused. “After that, we had the Holiday Party, and that was awesome. We raised so many coins, guys. It was the best year we’ve had for Coins for Change yet.”
“While we were all donating, we were also transforming ourselves into Jack Frosts and reindeer puffles. I spent three days as a reindeer puffle because a friend of mine wanted to run tests on me.” In the audience, PH and Franky both laughed. “But that’s another story.”

“So then Gary decided to go messing with the fabrics of time, but thank God, he didn’t destroy the universe when he figured out how to make us time-travel the next month. We all went back to the dinosaur times. It was.. interesting, to say the least.” A couple laughs in the crowd. “The mascots were all required to transform into a dinosaur at least once. Rookie took advantage of that and terrorized the caveguins as a pterodactyl for an entire day.” Rookie laughed. “Nobody was hurt, but it was pretty dang terrifying.” More laughing.

“After the Prehistoric Party...” I paused for a second. “... we went Hollywood. Every twenty minutes or so, I could hear the limo passing by my igloo. It sounded like everyone was partying away, so I had to go check it out for myself. When I got to the Snow Forts, I felt like I was on Ethel Island. And I mean that in every good way possible. It was epic. Everyone on the other islands says that we don’t have the capability to produce a good awards show, but we proved them wrong with that one.”

“March took us into the clouds... literally. I launched myself out of that cannon nine times, and not once did I tragically fall to my death. The legendary rainbow puffle exists. I guess we’ll have to start looking for the golden puffle next.” I grinned. “PH, can you get on that?”

That part wasn’t actually in my typed speech, but it brought a lot of laughs from the crowd. PH was bright red, but still laughed.

I went on to talk about the Marvel party, the Monstres University party, the Star Wars party, the Teen Beach party, and so on until I got to the 8th anniversary.

“Today, we should all be really proud of what we did this year. We discovered so many new things and had a ton of fun while we did it. I think it’s been one of the best years yet, and I’m looking forward to years to come.” I paused, smiling. “Thanks for your time, everyone.”

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Later that day
Setting: The Town
Time: 5:15 PM PST
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“Where’s the cake at?” Petey K asked.
“Inside the Coffee Shop,” I said. “Can you survive five more songs and then go get cake?”
“I really want cake,” he complained, swinging his guitar off over his shoulder and putting it on a stand.
I sighed. “You’re difficult. Go get cake. Be quick. We’re back on in ten minutes.”
“Will do,” he said. “Come with me, Billy.”
“It’s not worth it, Petey, you’ll have to throw it away,” G-Billy replied.
“I will?”
“Yeah.”
“I guess I can survive five more songs...”
“He doesn’t listen to me, but he listens to you,” I said to G-Billy. “Why?”
“Because he likes me better,” he teased.
I grinned. “Sure, sure.”

“I wanna sleep,” Franky said. “This show is fun, but I wanna sleep.”
“So do I,” I replied. “I was up so late last night.”
“Yeah...” He yawned.

“Okay, y’know what? Do we need a break or should we just finish up so we can pack up? I’d like to extend the show, but I’m so tired...” I said.
“We don’t need a break,” G-Billy said, shaking his head.
“Okay, then let’s just do the last five songs.”
“Good plan.”

I plugged my bass back in, putting my water bottle aside. “Let’s rock.”

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