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orangetot — Gift
Published: 2003-11-06 18:56:10 +0000 UTC; Views: 102; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 19
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Description I saw that smile
When I found
A flush of lilies at my door
And you
In my windflower sheets,
When I asked
If I could keep you
Just for a while.
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Comments: 12

badblokebob [2003-11-19 00:32:35 +0000 UTC]

Short and sweet, always nice I like the ending -- something poignant about it.

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searchingforsomethin [2003-11-14 01:22:13 +0000 UTC]

i recognize that there was an emotion that you were keeping from the reader which you say yourself is sorrow. it made me happy because you expressed so well not becuase i felt it was a "happy" poem. you kept the emotion so important to you well hidden. and i like hidden emotions in things. cause its what i know best!

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orangetot In reply to searchingforsomethin [2003-11-14 06:43:10 +0000 UTC]

haha. well join that club.
I like to think that the reader can tell how i was feeling, that the words tell you the emotion. it means i'm kind of doing it right. ish. No one else picked up on its hidden parts, so know you are the first. i think.
Thanks

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searchingforsomethin [2003-11-13 13:11:54 +0000 UTC]

just looked at the photo. you say that diffrent lillies have diffrent meanings. is that part of a red lillies in the photo.. it seems like you are trying to say something with the photo? does it have any meaning ?

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orangetot In reply to searchingforsomethin [2003-11-13 14:11:38 +0000 UTC]

That petal is of a lily that was given to me. The point of this lily was to imply the presence of others, unfotunately its not the lily signifying the emotion i would like it to, but its all a part of it. Thankyou for looking at my poetry so closely

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searchingforsomethin [2003-11-13 13:08:55 +0000 UTC]

i really love things that are symbolic and you seem to do that and it makes me happy! It displays a hidden emotion, well to me atleast, and that as well makes me happy. good work!

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orangetot In reply to searchingforsomethin [2003-11-13 14:04:21 +0000 UTC]

As long as i made you smile. for me, this poem hold a undertone of sorrow, but no one else seems to recognise this - but then the point of poetry is that you can percieve it how you wish.
Thanks for the comment

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polyhymnia [2003-11-12 20:19:35 +0000 UTC]

Beautiful And most of all - complete. I completely forbid you to change it or add anything to it

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orangetot In reply to polyhymnia [2003-11-12 22:22:04 +0000 UTC]

I think people might get fed up of my short poetry, but for now, thanks

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onewithnoname [2003-11-07 02:31:00 +0000 UTC]

not to belittle your poem any.. bc i did send you a note afterall.. i just had to comment on how the lines "When I asked
If I could keep you
Just for a while." reminded me of the movie casper -- if you've seen the movie you should remember.. devon sawa, christina ricci.. good innocent times--.. superficial i know, but it brought a smile to my face.. later days!

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skribbledot [2003-11-06 21:14:53 +0000 UTC]

Simple but nice. I must say that this is a bit more upbeat and therefore long awaited! I love the imagery of the 'flush of lillies', any metaphor behind that?

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orangetot In reply to skribbledot [2003-11-06 21:40:10 +0000 UTC]

ha! i knew it! i thought it sounded upbeat. in actual fact, for me it's not. but i thought i'd managed it so-so to let to impress yourself upon it. yay for me. there is a certain image behind the lily idea, but the idea generally was that i didnt specifiy colour. lilies mean purity, beauty, distain or hatred depending on the colour. i was plying for the ambigious answer which follows after the end. also, windflower represents abandonment.
so there
but do you like it?

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