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#kapanihan #anxiety #blood #depression #emotional #mobbing #selfharm #whatevermankillmealready #paintausea
Published: 2015-05-07 17:57:21 +0000 UTC; Views: 32916; Favourites: 363; Downloads: 58
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Comments: 40
themothman124 [2024-05-04 04:31:43 +0000 UTC]
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MadMackLeCat [2016-05-28 01:18:53 +0000 UTC]
Angel's eyes are smiling,
But her mind is saying another thing.
Angel doesn't like to dress in short sleeves.
It shows off her eye capturing scars.
Angel is crying now.
Angel won't be stopping... Ever.
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paintausea In reply to MadMackLeCat [2016-05-29 21:07:09 +0000 UTC]
Never...
Never...ever. ever. ever. ever.
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MadMackLeCat In reply to paintausea [2016-06-01 17:49:20 +0000 UTC]
But maybe....
She can live a happy life.
One day...
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000SkyArrow000 [2015-10-04 22:48:53 +0000 UTC]
you really know draw emotions....that one I could say is the one I most relate in that exactly moment.....I wished to stop feeling in that way.....but I feel it part of me...anyway....words is nothing to describe your art.....of course no one are able to understand you.....but we can only feel your art......
I remember one time I avoided look too much for that drawing.... today feels so right for me keep looking for that...don't make me feel better....hard to say.....is like see a part of what I feel
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paintausea In reply to 000SkyArrow000 [2015-10-06 13:57:13 +0000 UTC]
It is maybe.. a very confrontational thing to see one's own pain reflected in a painting...
It can be comforting depending on how you view it..
I know how devastating and painful this feeling is..
But perhaps maybe you can let yourself know that you are not the only one battling against this..
Thank you for having the courage to look up this painting and view it again..
Small.. little.. steps..
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000SkyArrow000 In reply to paintausea [2016-06-12 23:06:02 +0000 UTC]
and I thank you for not only share your epic arts/feelings here.....being sincere the impact your art have in me is like really face my own depression taking a form and looking into my eyes......
and even if looks so sad.....comfort me in some way....and I thank you for that...a lot.........I am sure you are helping a lot people without even notice it......
most time I feel something that hurt me that I can't put in words.....or explain to others when ask me if I am fine......but your art don't try to help me....or ask me anything......is like really see my depression...sadness....regrets.....but is not coming from me.......hard to explain.......your art make me remember something I feel in my worst moments of depression that happens a lot nights......but for don't be that moment when I look that drawings.....for always be depressed....I feel that odd feeling deep inside that remember all my own pain.....but is like to face it in a way that I could understand better.....not for make sense....but to have a form...for be something different from all others I keep asking myself again....again....maybe just to hurt myself...
I don't look your art a lot......but the moments I am in contact I can say is a unique experience only your gallery are able to do.......and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for be so kind to let us not only see it....but even post comments....thank you a lot....and sorry for not be able to thank you enough for that
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Vladimir32 [2015-05-12 03:23:02 +0000 UTC]
It's like a combo of Pan's Labyrinth and Hellsing wrought with inner pain. I don't have any honest comprehension of what you're going through, so all I can do is offer my sympathies.
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paintausea In reply to Vladimir32 [2015-05-14 19:39:19 +0000 UTC]
That's such inspiring artists who created those...!
I feel so honored.. thank you... !
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momo-lucario [2015-05-09 03:43:34 +0000 UTC]
indescribable... i'm kind of at a loss of words. i've been typing different things here for maybe five minutes, but nothing quite fits how i feel for it. except that i want to cry kind of.
i think if i cried, if i had eyes on my arms, they'd cry too.
but from laughter.
because it's so funny!
perfect, as always.
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paintausea In reply to momo-lucario [2015-05-14 18:54:55 +0000 UTC]
You always intrigue me with your words..
Thank you so much for understanding.
Please take care!
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momo-lucario In reply to paintausea [2015-05-15 02:57:21 +0000 UTC]
well i'm glad ^ ^
you're welcome, and thank you for being so strong.
i wish the same for you, sweet one!
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Kinotsune [2015-05-08 16:06:07 +0000 UTC]
das ist mal wieder so stark und intensiv, dass es einen innerlich zerreißt. und gleichzeitig fühl ich mich immer verstanden, wenn ich deine bilder seh. in dem Punkt bewundere ich dich besonders.
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paintausea In reply to Kinotsune [2015-05-08 17:07:28 +0000 UTC]
Vielen Dank... herzlichen Dank.
Ich habe immer Angst dass die meisten es doch nicht verstehen... kurz ein Auge drauf werfen und nichts dazu empfinden.. Manchmal möchte ich das Malen wirklich einfach aufgeben weil ich denke dass es doch nichts bringt und ich nur zu gerne in selbst verzweiflung schwebe...
Deswegen vielen Dank für deine Worte...
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Kinotsune In reply to paintausea [2015-05-09 10:33:48 +0000 UTC]
gern geschehen.
und danke für deine Bilder. immer wenn ich sie sehe, weiß ich, dass ich nicht allein damit bin. das weiß ich auch so, aber es ist - und ich weiß wie dämlich das jetzt klingt - iwie tröstlich zu wissen.
ich habs aufgegeben. mein rat wäre, mach es nicht. man fühlt sich nur noch leerer. aber mir fehlen die kraft und die zeit wieder anzufangen.
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paintausea In reply to Kinotsune [2015-05-14 19:57:36 +0000 UTC]
Das tut mir so Leid..
Ich wünschte ich könnte dir iwie damit helfen..
vielleicht mit kleinen Sachen anfangen..?
Anderen Medien..?
Oder ist dir das jetzt alles zu viel...?
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Kinotsune In reply to paintausea [2015-05-15 10:17:08 +0000 UTC]
du hilfst mir mehr als die meisten anderen, weil du weißt, wie man sich fühlt. die anderen sagen immer bloß, ich soll mich nicht so anstellen oder soll dagegen ankämpfen.
ja. meine ma will mir das stricken beibringen. find ich gut. <2
aber ich finde nie den mut was neues anzufangen.
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paintausea In reply to Kinotsune [2015-08-13 18:44:07 +0000 UTC]
", ich soll mich nicht so anstellen oder soll dagegen ankämpfen."
Ich kenne das nur zu gut...
Das tut mir unendlich Leid dass du mit solchen Leute umgehen musst. Solche Leute wollen und können es zu ein bistimmten Grad nicht verstehen.. (wenn sie nur wüssten...)
Wie läuft es mit dem stricken?
Man kann solche tolle Sachen damit machen..!
Ich hoffe du findest den Mut eines Tages.
Merk dir nur dass es nicht perfekt sein muss..
Sowas beim ersten mal ist unmöglich.
Also mache so viele Fehler wies nur geht!
Daraus lern man viel...
Viel, viel Glück!
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Kinotsune In reply to paintausea [2015-08-14 15:21:42 +0000 UTC]
ja, das sind meistens keine leute in meiner umgebung. von solchen distanzier ich mich.
nein, das ist wie mit migräne. wer sie nicht hat, wird nie verstehen, dass es nicht einfach kopfschmerzen sind.
oh ich habe ein, zwei klägliche Versuche hinter mir und momentan fehlt mir die zeit aber auch etwas die lust.
danke. ich werde fehler machen, aber das ist ok. das ist gut.
danke. vielen dank.
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paintausea In reply to Kinotsune [2015-08-21 21:37:06 +0000 UTC]
(: ...
Ich würde sie gerne sehen!
Das ist okay.. Fehler geben dir nur mehr möglichkeiten fortshritte zu machen...!
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Kinotsune In reply to paintausea [2015-08-22 09:13:19 +0000 UTC]
ja, das stimmt. fehler machen einen ... ich möchte nicht 'menschlicher' sagen, aber mir fällt kein anderes Wort ein.
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paintausea In reply to Kinotsune [2015-08-30 22:14:29 +0000 UTC]
Fehler = Menschlich.
Keiner ist perfekt. "Perfekt" ist sowieso nur eine innere Illusion.
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MR-NIK [2015-05-07 23:36:30 +0000 UTC]
You are so strong Gracie! I am so proud of you. You exercise control over your impulses and you are heading towards new help soon. I know you are tired, and I know you are afraid right now but please clench your fists and punch the fear in the face. I support you 110%!!
You rule so much!
You kick so much ass!! *bandages your arms* *wipes your tears away*
I admire your brilliant strength!! Your pain mocks you but it doesn't know of your greatness.
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paintausea In reply to MR-NIK [2015-05-08 17:04:05 +0000 UTC]
I have the greatest and best brother...
Thank you so much, nii-chan...
Your words always carry a lot of healing within them..
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Kinotsune In reply to MR-NIK [2015-05-08 16:04:28 +0000 UTC]
you speak straight from my heart what i always failed to tell her. thank you.
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Cerecin [2015-05-07 21:09:58 +0000 UTC]
"I don't know what's worse, how hurt I am over this or the idiocy of being so hurt over this." -A persistent awareness
Well done Kapani, I love the psuedo-monochromatic look of it.
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paintausea In reply to Cerecin [2015-05-08 17:02:48 +0000 UTC]
I really like that quote... yes.. it seems very fitting..
Thank you very much..!
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urban-raptor [2015-05-07 20:38:18 +0000 UTC]
I wish I could just go through the screen and give you a big bear hug! C'mere!
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paintausea In reply to urban-raptor [2015-05-08 17:02:08 +0000 UTC]
-clings to leg- ... T T...
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urban-raptor In reply to paintausea [2015-05-10 10:33:13 +0000 UTC]
-kneels and pats your head affectionately-
How do I go about making you smile?
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paintausea In reply to urban-raptor [2015-05-14 19:53:25 +0000 UTC]
Oh.. oh.. I wish I knew myself.. I'm sorry...
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urban-raptor In reply to paintausea [2015-05-15 20:56:45 +0000 UTC]
When I get to the Netherlands I'll take a trip to Germany and treat you some delicious ice cream if you feel like getting out of your house D:
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paintausea In reply to urban-raptor [2015-08-03 16:57:25 +0000 UTC]
Hahahah that is soooo cute <3
Thank you!
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samiclayvivianmel [2015-05-07 18:47:40 +0000 UTC]
your pain is real. you are not exaggerating it or making it up. you don't deserve to be in so much pain. I'm here.
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paintausea In reply to samiclayvivianmel [2015-05-07 20:27:41 +0000 UTC]
Or is the pain mocking me...?
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samiclayvivianmel In reply to paintausea [2015-05-09 00:50:52 +0000 UTC]
if it is, I don't know how to fix it yet. I'll try to learn.
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