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ParanoidAndroid22 — Ludacris Without Clever Rhymes
Published: 2004-08-22 20:23:19 +0000 UTC; Views: 133; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 3
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Description
Yeah…yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah…I know what you’re thinkingLyrics mean nothing when you’re only listening to the music
But I think it goes deeper than that
The words that you don’t listen to come spouting out
Their isn’t a mirror that shows their repulsiveness
Yet you say them without second thought
Cursing used to be sacred
Now they call it “human nature”
When your slippery tongue takes the ground out from under me
You look a lot bigger from down here
But I do it as well
And these clever words don’t make up for mistakes
I just hope for a cure and don’t worry about trying to stop
I can’t beat them, but I won’t join them
That was the worst advice I’d ever heard
But what to expect
I’ll try to stop
But with help from the one who is useful
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Comments: 16
"Their isn’t a mirror that..." -- you spelled "there" wrong, mate.
Otherwise, I like the idea of this piece. while i agree with the intent of what you're saying, there are some things i'm not sure about -- you say that cursing used to be sacred, but now its second nature? perhaps it was just less mainstream then, but i wouldn't esteem it as something that's "sacred" persay...
the phrase "I can’t beat them, but I won’t join them" is very common; i'm not sure the cliche was necessary.
other than all of that, i really genuinely did like this. the idea is very good.
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Youch! It kindof stings to hear your shortcommings, especially when you have no room to dissagree because it's the truth. But thank you for pointing those things out! I'm so fickel on this subject that I neerly regret writing a poem on it...You are very right about it not being as mainstreem...sheehs...ahh well. Thanks for your criticism! It helps!
~Eric
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lol, i hope i didn't sound too blunt. sometimes i can be very critical... but only when i actually care about something. and your poems, i think, are excellent (much better than a lot of the poetry on DA... hehehe) so they're worth the effort. criticism helps... yes indeed. have a good one
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That means so much! Thank you for your kind words and I will take to heart what you told me about this one! You are a great artist and encouragement from you is held in high esteem by me! Have a great day!
~Eric
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I just have to say that what you have to say is real... I like this poem.. or should i see lyrics.. Love it.. Keep it up
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No your right its a poem. I doubt it would go well with any music but if your inclined to write some to it, I'd love to hear it sometime! Well I must be going but i want you to know I apriciate your comments!
Thanks again,
Eric
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You welcome.. maybe i will write some to it.. maybe we could make some music with it.. you know... I try...
Fairy
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That would be great! Im learning guitar, but i stink! Well have a great day
~Eric
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Ok..then we are on... dude how was you weekend.. mine sucked.
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mine was pretty dang boring....I was a bum. What did you do?
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well same old thing went to school, eat, ran 2miles( bad timing as usuall) you know... same boring life.
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well same old thing went to school, eat, ran 2miles( bad timing as usuall) you know... same boring life.
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yeh, nice concept and revelation here. love how its just like someone talking.. with the whole 'yeah yeah's' at the beginning, thats interesting.
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Jenna, thank you so much for your comments. I enjoy them emensly! Well thanks again and have a great day.
~Eric
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