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Published: 2009-10-29 13:09:10 +0000 UTC; Views: 6934; Favourites: 228; Downloads: 298
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Description
I released my regrets like a million balloonschasing the sky with their bright round bodies --
wingless martyrs caught each tiny breath of air
and soared,
a moment of epiphany
when your rubbery skin punctures
and the soul escapes.
There is no element light enough to lift me away,
no instrument to sever the strings that earth
my tiny anklets --
I sway with the seasons
as if I am surrounded by an ocean,
unable to tread water fast enough to run,
nor find the reach to break the surface
where those regrets float momentarily,
winking in the sunlight before they coast away,
waiting for my realisation --
they pollute my conscience
until I am ready to let them leave.
I blow watery kisses as I watch them fly --
tiny polka dots dodging clouds,
out of sight.
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Comments: 88
Leanndra51 [2010-10-06 17:41:52 +0000 UTC]
A beautiful evocative poem.
Congratulations on the Daily Deviation.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
bardicsidhe [2010-07-26 19:14:52 +0000 UTC]
This is such an evocative piece of poetry. You painted a vivid picture and got your point across beautifully. The rhythm and pacing of the piece is very well done, too.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
IndifferentIsolation [2010-02-22 19:07:26 +0000 UTC]
Congrats on your DD, was well deserved
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Ever-smiling [2010-02-22 00:42:08 +0000 UTC]
Beautiful poem. You capture them emotion and imagery very well.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
squanpie [2010-02-21 22:19:24 +0000 UTC]
thought I recognised that flowery literature tag thingy
congrats on the DD.
How're you doing there? haven't talked to you for ages
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
poisonedrose In reply to squanpie [2010-02-22 18:41:45 +0000 UTC]
Haha, yep it's me! I'm doing okay, how about you?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
squanpie In reply to poisonedrose [2010-02-23 17:19:29 +0000 UTC]
not too bad. Got a nice offer from Sheffield uni for next year, now just need to get three A grades so they give me lots of extra money
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
poisonedrose In reply to squanpie [2010-02-23 18:17:46 +0000 UTC]
Well I'm sure you'll pull that off! Good luck
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
squanpie In reply to poisonedrose [2010-02-23 18:28:55 +0000 UTC]
haha, with luck. £2000 should provide a little encouragement to try harder
thanks
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
lhinelle [2010-02-21 20:23:40 +0000 UTC]
somehow, I think everyone needs to realize this in their lives. Wonderful piece. ^^
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
poisonedrose In reply to lhinelle [2010-02-22 18:42:37 +0000 UTC]
Thanks, I'm glad you liked it
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
LancelotPrice [2010-02-21 19:10:41 +0000 UTC]
Very well done. Not just the metaphor, but the line breaks.
Faved. Thanks for letting us see it.
Lance
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
poisonedrose In reply to LancelotPrice [2010-02-22 18:44:27 +0000 UTC]
No problem, thanks for your comment!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
ThornyEnglishRose [2010-02-21 19:00:30 +0000 UTC]
Congratulations on a much-deserved DD. This piece is typically brilliant, of course.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Alimari [2010-02-21 18:38:12 +0000 UTC]
you've done a great job of taking a simile and running with it. nicely done!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
giffordm [2010-02-21 17:09:36 +0000 UTC]
i really love the imagery and emotion in this piece. very well done.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
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