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prismageek — TCP_Rough_083011
Published: 2011-09-01 06:50:28 +0000 UTC; Views: 1434; Favourites: 29; Downloads: 9
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Description
The ongoing saga of this comic continues...The missing pages were waiting on a 3D model I've been working on, sorry. If you're confused you can check the book or see the previous rough I uploaded before.
Comments welcome!
ONLY FOR USE WITH TORTALL COMICS PROJECT
This is intended for publication, so it is not to be edited or used in any fashion outside of it's original purpose. Thanks!
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Comments: 20
Hahaha oh I felt a little sorry for George in this scene but that silly scoundrel kinda had at least a few surprises coming
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I really like the panel where George realizes that he has to get dressed, his face is so cute.
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...especially the panel where Alanna is looking up and saying "It's Alanna", I love that one.
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I kinda liked the first layout better, but there are strong points in this too. In the first panel of (I think) page six where George is yelling "You're a WHAT?!" I think that perhaps Alanna should be recoiling form him a bit, cringing back (but not in an 'I'm afraid of him' way, in a 'You're way too loud, way too early in the morning, George' way--maybe have her hands over her ears.) I really like the last two pages though, the expressions are great.
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I like the thought that Alanna goes through when she's deciding whether or not to tell George her name. That's nice.
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... Will I be completely shot if I say I kind of liked the original better?
*ducks*
It's just... hm. Your paneling layouts for this draft are all about exactly the same. And the last one had so much character. I do like some things - like the female symbols floating around George's head, and the expressions are top notch - but I think your first posted version was a lot more engaging.
Make of that what you will, I suppose. (At least you have more than one draft done. Hello, way more productive than me!)
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I don't shoot what I can't eat
Do you know which panels in particular you mean (from the original) I can always tweak it again before the pencil deadline if I agree with you
Thanks for you critique!!!!
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Aw man, you're gonna make me do work to figure it out?
I don't know exactly if it's particular panels or not, but I'll check. It's just, with this revision, it's pretty much just three same-sized panels on each page, and that gets repetitive.
You're welcome~ :3
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