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Published: 2013-06-26 02:27:01 +0000 UTC; Views: 41154; Favourites: 721; Downloads: 5
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“I know you like someone.”“Thut up, _____! I do not!”
“Aww, c’mon Lisp King, there’s gotta be a girl out there who’s caught your eye. The red one, of course.” Sollux Captor glared at you through his bi-colored glasses.
“I do not-I repeat, do not want a matethpiritthhip with anyone.”
“Ah! Kismesis, then?”
“No! Ugh, fine,” He stopped you before you could ask about the two others, “If-and that ith an exthtremely fucking large if-I wanted to be in a quadrant with anyone right now, it would be matethpirth.”
“Hah! I knew it.” You yelled, pointing your finger accusingly at him. You were both sitting cross legged on the floor of his hive, when you had suddenly questioned him about his quadrants. Apparently his red one was open and ready for filling.
“Soooo...”
“Tho what?” You leaned over in Sollux's ear.
“Who is it?” You questioned. He pulled back, a sputtering, blushing mess.
“_____, I told you, there’th-” He faltered for a moment. “-There’th no one I want...in...that...quadrant...”He said, his voice getting lower as he ended the sentence. You snickered.
“Whooooo issss itttttt?” You chuckled, knowing you had won.
“Well, i’ve known her for quite a while now, but I know the doeth’nt like me back.” Well, that ruled you out. You sighed, looking at his face to watch him talk. It was like he drew you in more with every adorably lisped word. You could try to be like this girl he liked, and maybe he would like you back...
“And bathically, the’th my dream girl. I feel more red for her than I have anyone else.” You could feel your heart break, but you never let your smile slip.
“Oh really? Wouldn’t want her to get away, now would you?”
“No, that would be-wait, what are you getting at?” He said, looking you in the eyes.
“Call her!” You squealed. “Confess this ‘dream girl’ flushcrush!”
“What!? No _____, the’ll probably reject me.”
“Oh come on, who in their right mind would ever dump a chance with a positively amazing, alluring, wonderful, caring, not to mention handsome-”
“Uh, _____?” He interrupted you. Your face burned as you realized you were staring at him with a dream-like expression.
“A-HEM, I meant, a nice guy like you?” You squeaked with an awkward smile. He shook his head.
“Back to the point. Anywayth, I’m not calling her.”
“Why not, lithp king? Are you thcared?” You mocked his lisp.
“_____, don’t do that.” He said.
“Sorry.” He saw the hopeless look in your eyes and sighed.
“Fine. I’ll call her. But only becauthe I am NOT thcared.” He pulled out his phone [A/N: Do trolls have phones? Fuck it, they do for the sake of the storyline. Deal with it.] and began to dial a number. “Wait,” He used his psionics and turned you to where you were facing away from him. You then heard him do the same. “Okay, now i’ll call her.”
You heard your phone ringing in your pocket. Probably just your guardian checking up on you. You pulled your phone out, instantly hitting “Answer” without even looking out of habit.
“_____, I’m fluthed for you.”
The phone slid out of your hand to hit the floor with a thud. You sat frozen, unable to comprehend what exactly was happening. Sollux (once again using his psionics) turned you around to face him, and sat down on the floor cross-legged again.
“Thee, I told you the’d rejec-” You grabbed his shirt collar and yanked him towards you, kissing him full force. Your eyes were squeezed shut while his flew wide open, shocked at what was happening. When he finally settled in and kissed back, his hands resting on the back and side of your head, you felt him smile into the kiss. As soon as you broke away (Damn air. It’s like we need it to breathe or something.) from the kiss, Sollux looked at you with amazement in his eyes. “Oh...tho you’re fluthed for me two?”
“Of course, idiot.” You smiled, going in for another kiss. Sollux smiled. If only you knew what he had always had planned for you two.
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Comments: 336
Ice-cold-queen In reply to winglessEnthusiast [2016-09-05 13:33:23 +0000 UTC]
Legit best comment I have ever seen
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
InvaderMoonchy [2016-01-30 04:05:56 +0000 UTC]
After remembering Im an equivalent to Tholukth [I cant his lisp-]
and after reading this, yOOO-
THIS IS LIKE A ME X ME COMIC.
THE FACT THAT I ACT TE SAME WAY AS SOLLUX ACTED IN THIS-
YOOOO
And heres the thing-
I have a lisp, and wear glasses, *and* Im glued to my laptop.
BBRYUH
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
Xx-Karkat--Vantas-xX In reply to InvaderMoonchy [2018-12-21 02:59:06 +0000 UTC]
Hey, I'm the same except for glasses!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
MissElainaKiss [2015-12-14 02:07:13 +0000 UTC]
"Damn air, it's like we need to breath or something" That just cracked me up making me say, "All we need it a swift sniff of Sollux, THAN were safe~!" But srsly, good job~!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
artfullyIrrational [2015-10-16 18:20:15 +0000 UTC]
Tfw you actually have a lisp. Also
DAMMIT AIR
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Bella789y [2015-08-09 04:44:41 +0000 UTC]
XD when it said her phone fell out of her hand I imagined it being dramatic and slow mo
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
WolfBiteMituna In reply to Bella789y [2016-01-29 19:29:24 +0000 UTC]
THANK YOU I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE XD
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
BlackHeart310 [2015-07-02 19:26:04 +0000 UTC]
thank you for this awesome story
-If only this can happend to me...in real life-
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Chibi-Katana [2015-04-10 05:17:09 +0000 UTC]
I have a friend who loves Sollux and when we rp, I have to be him, so I definitely agree with you. His lisp is the best to write, my gawd... This was really good, I loved it! It was funny too, I laughed so hard~
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Bloodpaw221 [2015-04-03 05:48:23 +0000 UTC]
\\fangirling
OMFG-
\\maks unhuman noises
YOUR KILLING ME HERE
IM DYING OF JOY
SJDHFHFHFH-\\dies
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
NekoMinecrafter [2015-03-31 17:59:18 +0000 UTC]
Holy mother of ducky ducks.... THIS IS SOOO CUTE *Squeals VERY loud*
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
PedoBearMustDie [2015-03-24 21:08:47 +0000 UTC]
is it weird that I was listening to the song Matespritship when I read this? I was also kinda imagining that instead of karkat singing to eridan, it was karkat singing to sollux
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
holyshitockymushroom In reply to hemospectrumkiller [2015-03-03 21:11:58 +0000 UTC]
agreed
benefits of seadwellers: long lasting kissers lmao
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
hemospectrumkiller In reply to holyshitockymushroom [2015-03-04 16:42:52 +0000 UTC]
They still breathe air, their gills only take in water. So really, no one benefits. >n<
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
ThePokemonz [2015-02-16 09:08:26 +0000 UTC]
I'm da lord of (stupidity) space! I no need no air, booch
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
MonaKeyRose02 [2015-01-10 23:54:02 +0000 UTC]
A/N: Do trolls have phones? Fuck it, they do for the sake of the storyline. Deal with it.]
I read this and start laughing so hard woke my dad up......gog it was an awkward conversation.....also this is a great story.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
EmmalineHaesel [2015-01-02 01:54:10 +0000 UTC]
I'm the Sylph of Breath, I DON'T NEED AIR!!!!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
QuinntheConqueror In reply to EmmalineHaesel [2015-01-06 01:29:26 +0000 UTC]
Yeah! You two kiss as long as you want!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
EmmalineHaesel In reply to QuinntheConqueror [2015-01-11 04:52:44 +0000 UTC]
Hell yeah I will! *laughs*
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
NekoMinecrafter In reply to EmmalineHaesel [2015-03-31 17:58:27 +0000 UTC]
*matesprit passes out while kissing you*
You: "...Oops..."
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
EmmalineHaesel In reply to NekoMinecrafter [2015-05-23 01:00:06 +0000 UTC]
...God damn it...
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
apocalypticmayhem413 [2014-12-23 00:52:07 +0000 UTC]
We can use our noses for air we dont have to split
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
ThePokemonz In reply to apocalypticmayhem413 [2015-02-16 09:09:14 +0000 UTC]
That is what I though too, dude
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
QuinntheConqueror In reply to twinReflection [2014-12-20 17:09:20 +0000 UTC]
Ikr, such a cockblock.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Terezilover221 [2014-11-04 23:37:24 +0000 UTC]
why is it that i always say 'lisp' with a lisp? I do solluxes voice to much............I'M STARTING TO HAVE A LITHP..OH FUUUUUUTTTHHHHH
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
KieranHighlawn In reply to Terezilover221 [2014-11-25 01:39:08 +0000 UTC]
Same :3 I cosplay as Sol all the time and I've practiced my lisp so much it just randomly pops up at times.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
QuinntheConqueror In reply to HornsOfACancer [2014-11-04 00:10:25 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, it's such a cock-block, honestly. :/
Glad you liked it hehe
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
HornsOfACancer In reply to QuinntheConqueror [2014-11-04 02:28:11 +0000 UTC]
Yeah, you should write more!
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Blu-Roze [2014-10-19 01:45:23 +0000 UTC]
Do you know how much I wish that I didn't need to breathe? Super duper long kissing sessions in my fanfictions and it'd be easier to hold in my fangirl cries of happiness.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
QuinntheConqueror In reply to Blu-Roze [2014-10-19 15:37:18 +0000 UTC]
Ugh, yeah. Not to mention SPACE EXPLORATION (but mostly makeouts )
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
QuinntheConqueror In reply to RachWantsHerCupcake [2014-10-11 13:47:08 +0000 UTC]
Maybe uh-oh... IT'SUPFORYOUTODECIIIDDDEEEEE me being a lazy writer lmao
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
RachWantsHerCupcake In reply to QuinntheConqueror [2014-10-11 21:23:07 +0000 UTC]
I'm not sure.. it depennds.
-I can toootally understand that-
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
QuinntheConqueror In reply to Bleeding-Butterflies [2014-09-25 13:26:21 +0000 UTC]
Umm...sorry? what did i do haha
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
modukamagica [2014-09-18 12:01:28 +0000 UTC]
Damn air. It’s like we need it to breathe or something.
I KNOW RIGHT?!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
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