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Description
I woke up in my apartment wearing a short lacy dress. I honestly had no idea how I got into that, but I wasn't all that surprised. It's kind of typical.

I was in the kitchen roaming around sipping at a bottle of ramune when my cell phone started playing Cicada Man, you know, that Higurashi parody of Galaxy Man. Oh man I love that song~

"Hey Ruby--" I cut off Lu's voice.

"Hiii~" I grinned into the phone.

"I need another place to stay, you have any extra space?"

"Yesss~" Still grinning.

"I...I'm on my way..."

"Seee yaaa~" I hung up immediately.

"Lu's coming overrr~ So I can rape herrr~ And her giant booooobs~" I started petting my Viral pillow on the sofa.

Within a few minutes there was a knock on the door.

"Coming~" I pranced toward the door. I opened to door and the first thing I saw were boobs. Big juicy boobs, ohoho. I pulled Lu in. "Come on! I'll help you unpack."

I took her suitcase as I saw a pet carrier. "Oh, cool cat." I let it out.

I marched off down the hall to a room with a plain bed in it. I threw all of her shit onto the bed and walked out as I heard a bang on the floor, which was probably the suitcase rolling off the bed. I didn't turn back though.

"Okei Lu your shit is now in the room I never use," I hummed. I put on the creepiest face I could as I sat on her lap. "Make yourself at home ♥ "

"Hnnnnnn." She shook nervously.

A tired CR walked into the living room. "Hay whut's going on I herd a boom."

Lu was turning white. Which is funny, because she's mixed. I'm going to hell.

"It's about time you woke up, it's 3:00," I sighed.

"W-w-w-w-w-what's he doing here?" Luna was stuttering like one of those people on intervention.

"I invited him over~" I grinned and laughed like a rapist.

"Why is he in nothing but heart patterned boxers."

"Mmmhmhmmhmhmmhmhmmhmhmhahahhahahaahaha~"

"I...gotta...go to...work."

Lu sped out. No fun SOB.

I walked up to CR. "Okei well I'm gonna watch Gurren Lagann. Are you gonna go back to sleep?"

He was blushing. "Uhemmmmmm probably but...can I ask one thing?"

"Sure~"

There was a pause as I played with his hair.

"How did I get here?"

I had been waiting for Lu all day because CR had gone back to sleep. The rape made him super tired. I held out a plate of cookies I had coughboughtcough made.

"How was your day~?" I hummed.

"Help me~" She grabbed a cookie and plopped onto the couch next to me.

Did her boobs just smack her in the face. That's sexy. BUT NOT AS SEXY AS VIRAL--did I just hear a gunshot?

"With what?" I asked.

"Can you go on a double date with me?" She sighed as her face flushed.

"Why? Isn't this your first date with Gabe?"

"I've never gone on a date before and I need help~ C'mon, without a friend I'd never speak due to fear of saying something stupid."

"Why'd you even say yes if you were scared?" WAIT DID SHE SAY FRIEND? D'awww~

"IT WAS RED LOBSTER. I CAN'T SAY NO TO CRAB. FORGIVE ME."

Wimp.

"Fine~ But first..."

And so begins the rape.

Since Lu had gone out shopping with Alpha I decided to watch Gurren Lagann~

"OH VIRAL YOU SEXY BEEEEEEAST~"

CR stared at me as I started licking the TV screen. He had woken up and was chewing on a waffle on the couch behind me.

"You know there's shit on that screen that's probably not good to diges--"

"FUCK YOU CR. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT. VIRAL. IS. SO. MUCH. BETTER. THAN. YOOOOOOOOU," I screamed as I stood up.

"I DIDN'T COME HERE ON MY OWN ANYWAY WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT--"

Lu walked in.

"Uh. So. I see." She walked down the hall, opened the door to her room, and slammed the door shut behind her.

And I swear I heard the click of her lock.

After a dinner I made with CR and Lu, I strolled on over to Lu's spot on the sofa.

"So who do you plan to sleep with tonight~?" I grinned.

"W-what are you talking about~?" She nervously tried to act normal.

"I mean wouldn't you MUCH rather sleep in my room with me~? After all, a first night at a new place is awful frightening to some people," I put my hands on my hips. "Especially you ukes," I said as I poked her in the boob.

"DAAAAAA--"

[Insert muffled screams here]

"Morning Lu." I said.

She turned toward me. "Hello Ruby," she said turning back.

"I made a pot of kool-aid." I got bored.

"You don't make a pot of kool-aid," she said, annoyed.

"Well I-I did."

"Is it hot?"

"Maybe, maybe not~," I chimed.

"It's hot isn't it," Lu said plainly.

"Yep!" Kool-aid splattered out of the pot as I jumped. Whupps.

"Hot kool-aid?" Lu said each word strongly.

"I could put some ice in it if you'd like," I said gesturing toward the fridge.

"Uh, no, I'm not thirsty," she said taking a drink of her coffee. Bitch.

"Lu!"

"I'M NOT GONNA DRINK IT," she yelled.

"I made this for you," I whispered.

"NO."

"Drink it!" I started raising my voice.

"No."

"I want you to drink this."

"I'm not drinking it!"

"DRINK THIS RIGHT NOW OR I'LL POUR IT ON THE CAT AND I'LL BLAME IT ON YOU."

"Oh yeah, REAL MATURE," she said, exasperated.

I huffed. "I MADE THIS FOR YOU," I screamed.

"Now why don't you grow up?"

"I DID, BECAUSE I LOVE YOOOU!"

"Well I'm not gonna drink it," she said.

"I HATE YOOOOOOOU."

"That's all I ever hear anymore! Lu try this, Lu try that. Remember that? What was it? Cookies and uh..." She snapped. "What was it?"

"Tobasco."

"Tobasco!"

"That was a good idea."

"And don't forget rocky road with tobasco, right? Yeah. What was that, three hospitalised?" I shivered with anger. "Yeah, three women, hospitalised."

"YOU. DRINK THIS. RIGHT. NOWWWWWWWWWWWWW."

"DRINK YOUR OWN HOT KOOL-AID."

"There's SO much left of it," I said showing the pot and cup full. "What am I gonna do with all this hot kool-aid?" I spat.

"Drink it!"

"NO."

"Yes!"

"NO!"

I shoved myself into the chair next to Lu's.

"Lu," I said calmly.

"Yes," she sighed.

"Please! Drink. My. Hot. Kool-aid." I moved the glass next to her.

She looked at it. "Okay."

"Okay."

She sipped it hesitantly then set it down and paused for a minute.

She sighed. "Yeah it's pretty good."

I blinked then looked at her.

"Yeah I like that."

I started getting ready two hours before the date, and of course I made sure CR was getting ready too. Ohhh that gorgeous man.

Hmmm...Black dress, black pantyhose, black boots, black earrings.

Fuck you I'm not a goth you dumbasses.
Just after I finished putting on my makeup I walked out into the living room. Lu burst out of her bedroom.

Oh yeah I probably should've woken her up...an hour ago. WHUPPS.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU WAKE ME--" she began, but the doorbell chime interrupted her.

I skipped over to the door as Lu panicked back into her room.

"CR, HELP LU PUT HER CLOTHES ON. SHE'S TAKING TOO LONG." I yelled. I laughed.

"Comiiing~" I chimed.

Oh hello, Gabe. Mmmhahhaha~

"You can just sit over on the couch..." I pointed to the sofa.

"Is Lu not read--"

"SHE'S PERFECTLY FINE NOW SHUT UP I HAVE TO HELP LU." Way to be vague.

After undressing Lu ohohohohohooooo~ she looked pretty good. Especially her ass, oh God I wanted to smack her ass right then and there but Gabe was there. Hnnng.

A flustered CR came out of Lu's room last. Yes I made him watch.

"Good job back there, CR! I may have to take you with me again." Raep face.

"OHGODPLEASENONONONONOOOOOOO--"

"WE SHOULD GET GOING NOW DON'T YOU THINK~?" Lu shouted.

"YES I THINK THAT'S A GREAT IDEA, LU," Gabe added.

Bastards.

After the double date we decided to head back to my apartment to end with a little chatting.

Gabe set down his glass. "That was very good thank you."

After a pause CR yelled at me, "OH HONEY, SHOW THEM THAT THING THAT YOU DO."

"OH YEAH," I said.

I jumped up and bent over the coffee table in Gabe's face.

"UWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOAHAHAHHHAHHA~"

CR screeched with laughter.

"YOU WANT ME TO DO IT IN YOUR EAR HE LOVES IT WHEN I DO IT IN HIS EAR," I said pointing to the hysterical CR.

Lu had a panicked expression. "No I think it's okay--"

I jumped to the side of Gabe and bent toward his ear.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHHHAAA." CR and I were laughing like we were insane.

Gabe and Lu looked at each other.

"ISN'T THAT FUNNYYYYYYY?" CR's eyes widened as he laughed.

As Gabe was rubbing his ear a DVD hit him in the face.

I picked up a stack of DVDs. "WATCH THIS I CAN HIT YOU EVERY TIME IN THE FACE." I started flinging them at Gabe.

Gabe was flailing around trying to avoid them as CR kept on laughing it up. Lu was trying to defend herself.

"Ah--hold on--," Gabe tried to get out.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Lu screamed at the top of her lungs.

"THIS IS OUR TREEE~" CR pointed to a small plastic tree that appeared by him on the couch. I swear he's magical.

Lu shielded Gabe with her arm. Her hair was a total mess.

"Trees hate yoou. Trees hate you," I said as I shook.

Lu and Gabe sat up. "Maybe we should...just go," Lu said.

"I-I think we're gonna go..." Gabe rubbed his arm.

Outside Lu was screaming, "GO, GO AWAY!" as they sped off in Gabe's car.

I wonder if she realizes that she lives here now.

"Hehe, byye~" I waved tiredly.

I went back upstairs to the couch with CR and sighed.

We rested our heads on each other. "Maybe next time we should just tell them we're tired."

Description
I woke up in my apartment wearing a short lacy dress. I honestly had no idea how I got into that, but I wasn't all that surprised. It's kind of typical.

I was in the kitchen roaming around sipping at a bottle of ramune when my cell phone started playing Cicada Man, you know, that Higurashi parody of Galaxy Man. Oh man I love that song~

"Hey Ruby--" I cut off Lu's voice.

"Hiii~" I grinned into the phone.

"I need another place to stay, you have any extra space?"

"Yesss~" Still grinning.

"I...I'm on my way..."

"Seee yaaa~" I hung up immediately.

"Lu's coming overrr~ So I can rape herrr~ And her giant booooobs~" I started petting my Viral pillow on the sofa.

Within a few minutes there was a knock on the door.

"Coming~" I pranced toward the door. I opened to door and the first thing I saw were boobs. Big juicy boobs, ohoho. I pulled Lu in. "Come on! I'll help you unpack."

I took her suitcase as I saw a pet carrier. "Oh, cool cat." I let it out.

I marched off down the hall to a room with a plain bed in it. I threw all of her shit onto the bed and walked out as I heard a bang on the floor, which was probably the suitcase rolling off the bed. I didn't turn back though.

"Okei Lu your shit is now in the room I never use," I hummed. I put on the creepiest face I could as I sat on her lap. "Make yourself at home ♥ "

"Hnnnnnn." She shook nervously.

A tired CR walked into the living room. "Hay whut's going on I herd a boom."

Lu was turning white. Which is funny, because she's mixed. I'm going to hell.

"It's about time you woke up, it's 3:00," I sighed.

"W-w-w-w-w-what's he doing here?" Luna was stuttering like one of those people on intervention.

"I invited him over~" I grinned and laughed like a rapist.

"Why is he in nothing but heart patterned boxers."

"Mmmhmhmmhmhmmhmhmmhmhmhahahhahahaahaha~"

"I...gotta...go to...work."

Lu sped out. No fun SOB.

I walked up to CR. "Okei well I'm gonna watch Gurren Lagann. Are you gonna go back to sleep?"

He was blushing. "Uhemmmmmm probably but...can I ask one thing?"

"Sure~"

There was a pause as I played with his hair.

"How did I get here?"

I had been waiting for Lu all day because CR had gone back to sleep. The rape made him super tired. I held out a plate of cookies I had coughboughtcough made.

"How was your day~?" I hummed.

"Help me~" She grabbed a cookie and plopped onto the couch next to me.

Did her boobs just smack her in the face. That's sexy. BUT NOT AS SEXY AS VIRAL--did I just hear a gunshot?

"With what?" I asked.

"Can you go on a double date with me?" She sighed as her face flushed.

"Why? Isn't this your first date with Gabe?"

"I've never gone on a date before and I need help~ C'mon, without a friend I'd never speak due to fear of saying something stupid."

"Why'd you even say yes if you were scared?" WAIT DID SHE SAY FRIEND? D'awww~

"IT WAS RED LOBSTER. I CAN'T SAY NO TO CRAB. FORGIVE ME."

Wimp.

"Fine~ But first..."

And so begins the rape.

Since Lu had gone out shopping with Alpha I decided to watch Gurren Lagann~

"OH VIRAL YOU SEXY BEEEEEEAST~"

CR stared at me as I started licking the TV screen. He had woken up and was chewing on a waffle on the couch behind me.

"You know there's shit on that screen that's probably not good to diges--"

"FUCK YOU CR. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. HOW DARE YOU SAY THAT. VIRAL. IS. SO. MUCH. BETTER. THAN. YOOOOOOOOU," I screamed as I stood up.

"I DIDN'T COME HERE ON MY OWN ANYWAY WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT--"

Lu walked in.

"Uh. So. I see." She walked down the hall, opened the door to her room, and slammed the door shut behind her.

And I swear I heard the click of her lock.

After a dinner I made with CR and Lu, I strolled on over to Lu's spot on the sofa.

"So who do you plan to sleep with tonight~?" I grinned.

"W-what are you talking about~?" She nervously tried to act normal.

"I mean wouldn't you MUCH rather sleep in my room with me~? After all, a first night at a new place is awful frightening to some people," I put my hands on my hips. "Especially you ukes," I said as I poked her in the boob.

"DAAAAAA--"

[Insert muffled screams here]

"Morning Lu." I said.

She turned toward me. "Hello Ruby," she said turning back.

"I made a pot of kool-aid." I got bored.

"You don't make a pot of kool-aid," she said, annoyed.

"Well I-I did."

"Is it hot?"

"Maybe, maybe not~," I chimed.

"It's hot isn't it," Lu said plainly.

"Yep!" Kool-aid splattered out of the pot as I jumped. Whupps.

"Hot kool-aid?" Lu said each word strongly.

"I could put some ice in it if you'd like," I said gesturing toward the fridge.

"Uh, no, I'm not thirsty," she said taking a drink of her coffee. Bitch.

"Lu!"

"I'M NOT GONNA DRINK IT," she yelled.

"I made this for you," I whispered.

"NO."

"Drink it!" I started raising my voice.

"No."

"I want you to drink this."

"I'm not drinking it!"

"DRINK THIS RIGHT NOW OR I'LL POUR IT ON THE CAT AND I'LL BLAME IT ON YOU."

"Oh yeah, REAL MATURE," she said, exasperated.

I huffed. "I MADE THIS FOR YOU," I screamed.

"Now why don't you grow up?"

"I DID, BECAUSE I LOVE YOOOU!"

"Well I'm not gonna drink it," she said.

"I HATE YOOOOOOOU."

"That's all I ever hear anymore! Lu try this, Lu try that. Remember that? What was it? Cookies and uh..." She snapped. "What was it?"

"Tobasco."

"Tobasco!"

"That was a good idea."

"And don't forget rocky road with tobasco, right? Yeah. What was that, three hospitalised?" I shivered with anger. "Yeah, three women, hospitalised."

"YOU. DRINK THIS. RIGHT. NOWWWWWWWWWWWWW."

"DRINK YOUR OWN HOT KOOL-AID."

"There's SO much left of it," I said showing the pot and cup full. "What am I gonna do with all this hot kool-aid?" I spat.

"Drink it!"

"NO."

"Yes!"

"NO!"

I shoved myself into the chair next to Lu's.

"Lu," I said calmly.

"Yes," she sighed.

"Please! Drink. My. Hot. Kool-aid." I moved the glass next to her.

She looked at it. "Okay."

"Okay."

She sipped it hesitantly then set it down and paused for a minute.

She sighed. "Yeah it's pretty good."

I blinked then looked at her.

"Yeah I like that."

I started getting ready two hours before the date, and of course I made sure CR was getting ready too. Ohhh that gorgeous man.

Hmmm...Black dress, black pantyhose, black boots, black earrings.

Fuck you I'm not a goth you dumbasses.
Just after I finished putting on my makeup I walked out into the living room. Lu burst out of her bedroom.

Oh yeah I probably should've woken her up...an hour ago. WHUPPS.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU WAKE ME--" she began, but the doorbell chime interrupted her.

I skipped over to the door as Lu panicked back into her room.

"CR, HELP LU PUT HER CLOTHES ON. SHE'S TAKING TOO LONG." I yelled. I laughed.

"Comiiing~" I chimed.

Oh hello, Gabe. Mmmhahhaha~

"You can just sit over on the couch..." I pointed to the sofa.

"Is Lu not read--"

"SHE'S PERFECTLY FINE NOW SHUT UP I HAVE TO HELP LU." Way to be vague.

After undressing Lu ohohohohohooooo~ she looked pretty good. Especially her ass, oh God I wanted to smack her ass right then and there but Gabe was there. Hnnng.

A flustered CR came out of Lu's room last. Yes I made him watch.

"Good job back there, CR! I may have to take you with me again." Raep face.

"OHGODPLEASENONONONONOOOOOOO--"

"WE SHOULD GET GOING NOW DON'T YOU THINK~?" Lu shouted.

"YES I THINK THAT'S A GREAT IDEA, LU," Gabe added.

Bastards.

After the double date we decided to head back to my apartment to end with a little chatting.

Gabe set down his glass. "That was very good thank you."

After a pause CR yelled at me, "OH HONEY, SHOW THEM THAT THING THAT YOU DO."

"OH YEAH," I said.

I jumped up and bent over the coffee table in Gabe's face.

"UWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOAHAHAHHHAHHA~"

CR screeched with laughter.

"YOU WANT ME TO DO IT IN YOUR EAR HE LOVES IT WHEN I DO IT IN HIS EAR," I said pointing to the hysterical CR.

Lu had a panicked expression. "No I think it's okay--"

I jumped to the side of Gabe and bent toward his ear.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHHHAAA." CR and I were laughing like we were insane.

Gabe and Lu looked at each other.

"ISN'T THAT FUNNYYYYYYY?" CR's eyes widened as he laughed.

As Gabe was rubbing his ear a DVD hit him in the face.

I picked up a stack of DVDs. "WATCH THIS I CAN HIT YOU EVERY TIME IN THE FACE." I started flinging them at Gabe.

Gabe was flailing around trying to avoid them as CR kept on laughing it up. Lu was trying to defend herself.

"Ah--hold on--," Gabe tried to get out.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Lu screamed at the top of her lungs.

"THIS IS OUR TREEE~" CR pointed to a small plastic tree that appeared by him on the couch. I swear he's magical.

Lu shielded Gabe with her arm. Her hair was a total mess.

"Trees hate yoou. Trees hate you," I said as I shook.

Lu and Gabe sat up. "Maybe we should...just go," Lu said.

"I-I think we're gonna go..." Gabe rubbed his arm.

Outside Lu was screaming, "GO, GO AWAY!" as they sped off in Gabe's car.

I wonder if she realizes that she lives here now.

"Hehe, byye~" I waved tiredly.

I went back upstairs to the couch with CR and sighed.

We rested our heads on each other. "Maybe next time we should just tell them we're tired."