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SameStripes — celestial
Published: 2010-12-09 03:59:47 +0000 UTC; Views: 362; Favourites: 10; Downloads: 2
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Description
I want to peel the sun from the sky and place it on my tongue, where I'll leave it to dissolve until the world's very life source is nothing but a mouthful of coppery fluid dancing with my tonsils.I want to cram clouds into my mouth until my cheeks bulge, choke myself on them. I want to feel clouds pouring from my ears and my nose in fluffy streams, tickling the back of my throat, lovingly whispering for entrance to my padlocked heart.
When the moon comes out to play, I'll capture it in my hands, like a firefly, and I'll press my eye against a crack in my fingers to watch its star-studded wings flutter frantically against my palms.
I'll suck handfuls of stars like boiled sweets until they're fragile enough to crunch, exhale peppermint star dust into the black sugar-paper sky and laugh at the beauty of it all. I'll floss my teeth with lightning bolts, capture thunderclaps in bell jars, use rainbows as shoelaces and necklaces and bracelets.
Saturn's ring will be my own hula hoop, and I'll juggle the planets for you, if you'd like.
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Comments: 16
You didn't fail at the title at all. I'm probably annoying you with all the comments I'm leaving, so I'm sorry, but your work is just so freaking awesome
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This was really nice 
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This is beautifully incredible!! I absolutely love it! It's just so free and untethered imagination, and it really quite something else. It really captures the wonder and awe of the skies and natural world, things that are somewhat indescribable...
Fantastic work! Keep it up!!
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Your word choice is exquisite. My goodness. It's difficult for me to point out those phrases that I found so absolutely ravaging, but let me see... "a mouthful of coppery fluid" ("coppery" is such a lovely description for the sun, all bronzed and golden); "I want to feel clouds pouring from my ears and my nose in fluffy streams" (such a ticklish image! You combine sight and touch so well in this line); "star-studded wings" ("star-studded" - that alliteration, SQUEE). I adored that entire fourth paragraph - such edible GOODNESS! And I love how its perspective zooms out to embrace a bigger, cosmic picture: stars and a black sugar-paper sky; lightning bolts, thunderclaps, "rainbows as shoelaces and necklaces and bracelets." This, for me, was the climax of the piece: it has such energy.
I love your conclusion, with its touch of companionship: "I'll juggle the planets for you, if you'd like." I like that this is the only time that another character shows up. I couldn't really say why... how you've written feels just right.
What an gorgeous bit of prose!
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Thank you very much! 
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This is awesome! 
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Thanks!
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Me too
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God, this was so creative and unique and you wrote it beautifully. It was a pleasure reading it, i swear.
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