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'oh man. Oh man. Oh man. Who's gonna pick me? I really hope it isn't someone weird! Or him! Especially him! Wait, why worry about him? He isn't here. I don't see him. Y-Yeah. H-He's probably too busy with his pranks.'

"SOLD~! For 300 dollars! Thank you for the money Mr.Egbert!"

'E-Egbert!' Reader-chan, what you so worried about? It's your best bud Egbert! Remember? Egderp? Ooooh, wait. I get it. You want him to be your derp. Reader's gotta crush on Egderp! Reader's gotta crush on Egderp!

Before you could get another word out, you were swept off your feet. Literally. John had flown up and grabbed you bridal style, hovering away.

"Come on _____! We've got work to do!" His derpy face snickered. Welp, looks like John's got something mischievous planned, you can tell by looking at his face. You looked back really quick to see Foxy curling up in the cape of Eridan before they faded out of site. 'Well, here we go.'

~~~~~~~~~~(John flies by with you in his arms, changing the scene)~~~~~~~~~~

"John, you can put me down now you know." You said, hoping he didn't notice the blush rising to your cheeks.

"Oh yeah, sorry _____." John sat you down carefully on the floor of his room, Dave was out currently so it was just you two. "So, _____, you ready to help with the best prank ever!" It was more of a statement than a question.

"Um, I guess. But what exactly is the best prank ever?" You were pretty curious now, considering he was digging through his new prank chest.

"_____, you are going to become a troll!" John pulled out some clay, glue, paint, face paint, and headbands.

". . . .what?"

~~~~~~~~~~(John trips on his hood and spills the paint on the screen, it drips away to change the scene)~~~~~~~~~

"So, tell me again, why exactly you wanted me to do this?" You asked, while hanging up another troll horn, freshly painted, to dry.

"Because everyone will believe you! They'd know it was fake if it was me." John said through his teeth, which were holding a paint brush because he was too lazy to get a paper towel to sit it on while he hung his own freshly painted horns.

"There! Now, while those dry today, you've got to get a rash ____!" John smiled, putting his hands on his hips as he turned to you.

"Okay, ca you just straight out tell me what i'm doing from now on? Because you make everything sound so weird."

"You're weird."

"And you're a derp." You both stared at each other, then burst into laughter.

"Seriously though, we need to get your disease started." John pulled you over, slapping a container of grey face paint in your hand. He smiled, getting ready to explain you're job for today.

~~~~~~~~~~(You tossed the face paint container in the air, the scene changing mid fall before landing in your hand in the next scene)~~~~~~~~~~

John winked at you and you winked back as you both walked up to a group of your friends. Karkat, Sollux, Dave, Rose, and Kanaya were all standing at a corner with a bench, Rose and Kanaya were sitting, while the guys were standing around the bench. You walked up and sat beside Rose, John stood next to Karkat.

"Hey guys." You said, waving at Karkat and Sollux, to which Sollux waved back and Karkat nodded.

"'Sup." Dave said, like usual. Rose and Kanaya gave you both the usual 'Hello's. You looked down at your closed hand, which held a sponge smothered in the grey face paint, then quickly glanced at John. He gave you the signal, which was him adjusting his glasses. You gave him a slight nod, then nonchalantly laid back on the bench.

"So, was the art shop saved?" You asked, pretending to scratch your arm at the same time. When really, you were just rubbing the sponge against your arm, leaving a grey patch. No one really seemed to notice but John, though you knew that would change soon.

"Yes It Was, Eridan Spent Almost A Thousand Dollars On Your Fox Friend." Kanaya answered, turning to you. The paint was on your other arm so she wouldn't notice yet.

"That's good! Especially since- well I can't say but I can tell you Foxy'll be pretty happy." You smirked, only you knew of the Fox's crush on the fish. You also took this opportunity to stretch and pop your back, before leaning forward and sitting crisscross. You then placed your elbow on your leg (or knee, whatever) and laid your head in the palm of your sponge-wielding hand. You made sure to rub it n your cheek a bit, just in case.

"And why is tha-" Rose looked up from her book to ask, but her eyes widened a bit as she looked at you. Specifically your arm. You could hear John trying to hold back a little snort.

"Hmm? What's wrong Rose?" You lifted your head from your hand, revealing your grey cheek. You moved your arm down to the bench, slipping the sponge between the planks, to which John used his windy powers to move away to pick up at a later time. By this time, Sollux, Karkat, Dave, and Kanaya looked over as well. It was weird to see Rose worried, she was always calm and serious.

"_____, what's that?" Rose asked finally. "Yes, That Area Of Your Face Is Not It's Normal Color. Why Is This So?" Kanaya asked afterwards.

"What are you guys talking about?" You acted surprised, or clueless, whichever. As long as they thought you didn't know about it, you were good. You glanced over, seeing John with a shocked face. Sooooo faaaake.

"_____ WHAT'S UP WITH YOUR FACE?!" "Yeah, that'2 2eriiou2ly kiinda 2trange." Dave came over, a slight frown on his cool-kid façade, and let you use his shades to look at your reflection. You raised your hand to the grey blemish, acting shocked it was there. You gave Dave his shades back.

"I-I don't know what it is. I've never seen any kind of disease like this before, have you Rose?" "No I don't believe I have." "Do you think. . .this could be some new disease? Like a mutation type disease from being exposed to trolls or something?" Rose seemed to contemplate over it for a moment. "Well, that is possible."

"OH FUCK, _____ HAS SOME MUTATED DISEASE! EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF!" And with that, Karkat, your God, proceeded to run off, screaming for all to hear that you have a mutated disease. Welp. There goes your reputation. Thanks sooooo much John. You'll have to remind yourself later that he owes you a favor as well now.

"Okay, before anyone else starts to freak out or something else strange happens, I'm taking _____ back. Come on ____, we better go." Before anyone could react, John had grabbed your hand and was flying off with you.

~~~~~~~~~~(John flies by, dragging you by your feet to change the scene)~~~~~~~~~~

"That was awesome ____! Did you see their faces!" As soon as you guys made it back to John's room and the door was locked, John burst out laughing. You really hated to, but you did too. You both ended up on the floor, clutching your stomachs. You, honestly, couldn't believe you were able to pull that much off. Now you gotta do the whole transformation. Ooooh, this'll be good.

"So, what's the next part of the transformation?" You managed to ask once you regained your breath. As well as the Heir of Breath next to you. John put a hand up to stroke his fake beard in thought, after a moment he lifted a single finger, like in cartoons when people get an idea.

"Okay, well we don't wanna rush it, or else they'll catch on or get suspicious. So how about for the next couple days, you wear the face paint on every visible part of your body? That way, they'll think you turned grey permanently, or something. Then, we'll start with the small nubby horns we have, and have them slowly get bigger every week until you have a good set of horns." John explained.

"That. . .actually sounds really smart and planned out. Good job Air head." You giggled at your little pun. John, meanwhile, was confused. He took a moment to think over what you said, then he got it. His face lit up in a smile and he laughed along with you. Oooh good times, good times. Almost all of them are experienced with this adorable hunk of nerd right here next to you.

"Welp, ______, let's check on your horns."

~~~~~~~~~~(John stands up, then trips on a stuffed Salamander and changes the scene)~~~~~~~~~

"_____ are you sure you don't want to get this checked out?" Rose asked as you walked to class, Kanaya and John joining you.

"Nah, it doesn't hurt, and nothing else really seems different, besides my skin. Besides, it's actually kinda cool." You said, looking over your arms. You had been wearing the pain for about 3 days now. John said you should try using the tiny nubby horns at day four, so tomorrow. So far, no one seemed too worried, though Karkat was a bit on edge. He hated diseases, especially after he had gotten a cold from you once. Hehehe, whoops~ Anyways, Sollux said if you had started growing horns, then he would freak because he hates horn diseases, but unless that happened he could care less. He's an awesome friend and amazing hacker, but sometimes he can kinda be a dick. Just a little, you know he's really sweet. but he's saving all that for the girl he bought in the auction. Speaking of which, where has she been? You haven't seen her since the auction, not even in class. Huh. Oh well, you've got your own duties to attend to.

"Well, If You Do Ever Start To Experience Any Pain At All, Then I Would Highly Suggest Getting This Looked At. But As Long As You Are Not Worried, I Won't Force You. And It Really Doesn't Seem Harmful." Kanaya complimented on the conversation. Then continued more enthusiastically.

"By The Way, Since You Have Started To Develop The Physical Look Of A Troll, Would You Like Me To Make You Some Of Your Own Troll-Themed Clothing?" You smiled over at her.

"Sure Kan~! I would love that!" Kanaya smiled, though when you glanced at Rose, she seemed to have a bit of agitation in her look, but oh well. It's Rose, she's weird. You don't really understand her, but it doesn't matter too much.

"Alright Then, Since You Don't Seem To Have A Symbol Of Your Own, I Shall Use The Symbol Of The Person You Spend The Most Time With."

"And that would be. . .?"

"And that would be John." Rose said, and everyone turned to John who had been spacing out. Realizing everyone was looking at him, John snapped out of it, a pink tint forming on his cheeks.

"Y-Yeah, yeah that's fine. Come on ____, we need to get to class." John grabbed your free hand, the other had been holding books, and dragged you off. He was obviously occupied with his thoughts, he had a concentrated yet embarrassed look, and the blush seemed to increase as he put his other hand over his mouth, trying to hide it. You doubt he even heard what you and the girls were talking about, let alone realize you would be wearing his symbol soon. What could be on his mind?

You two walked into class, almost 10 minutes early, though most seats were already taken. You noticed Karkat and Sollux in the back talking, Karkat waved to you, Sollux glanced then went back to-. . .what's he doing? Texting? Yeah, he's texting someone. You were about to go ask him about your friend he bought, but before you could John dragged you to the other side of the room and sat next to Dave, who had on headphones and was head-twerking to a most likely sick beat, and doodling in his notebook, it looked like- NOPE. NOT GONNA GO THERE. LET'S JUST SAY THE MIND OF DAVE STRIDER IS AN INIGMA.

John sighs and puts his head in the palm of his free hand, his elbow on the desk. You stood there, looking at him. It seems he has forgotton he's holding your hand. And quite tightly at that. You tug your hand a little, and his grip tightens. A blush starts to rise on your cheeks as you speak up.

"Um. . .John?" John turns to look at you, kinda quickly. Did he completely forget you were there?

"Yeah _____?" He seemed so dang innocent. Oh you big Egderp!

"Um. . .my hand." John looked down, noticing your entwined hands, then a blush rapidly formed on his cheeks. He stuttered and let go, but you could've sworn you felt him give a tight squeeze before letting go.

"I-I'm sorry __-____! I-I just got used t-to it I-I guess. Heh heh." He scratched the back of his neck, looking anywhere but your eyes.

"I-It's alright John. I just needed to go sit down. I'll see you later?" You tilted your head a bit to the left, getting ready to walk back over to your trolls friends.

"Y-Yeah. We'll meet at my room later for the thing." You nodded, then froze as you heard a new, but all too familiar, voice.

"What 'thing' are you two talking about doing in my room?" You and John turned to the left, to see the headphones lowered from the blonde's ears and laying comfortably on his neck.

"N-Nothing!" You said a bit too quickly. Dave raised an eyebrow.

"Oh really? ____, I know how pervy John can be, I've been living with him." At this, John's face was permanently stained red. Yours was close. You looked at John, shocked.

"D-Dave! I-I am n-not!"

"Yeah, and I'm not cool. Yeah right John. Anyways, I just don't want to come home, all exhausted and ready to take a nice long visit to pillow town, on comfortor field, to find it has snowed over the land." Dave then raised his headphones back up, ignoring the spluttering derp next to him. You stood there for a moment, then your face burned as you got what he was implying. You had to get out of here. At this rate you'd end up sweating and ruining the prank!

"W-Well, class I-is about to start. S-So I'm gonna go to my seat, K-K John? Bye, s-see ya later." You then absconded quicker than anyone ever had, even though it was just across the room.

"What'th with the bluth ____?" 'Shiiiiiiiit!'

~~~~~~~~(You facedesk then as you raise your head the scene changes behind you)~~~~~~~~~

"So, how do I look~?" You asked, fixing your hair to cover the headband your troll horns were attached too. You turned to John, and expectant smile on your face. He mumbled something, a tiny blush on his cheeks, but you didn't hear it. Before you could ask him to repeat, he grabbed you by your shoulder, turning you so you were both looking at your reflections in the mirror.

"Like a natural born troll~!" He answered, a derpy smile on his face. You smiled back, then looked over yourself in the mirror.

"Oh yeah! Kanaya finished my troll shirt! I should put that on." You un-captchaloged the shirt from your sylledex, then headed into the bathroom to change, leaving a confused derp to stare in your direction. When did Kanaya make you a troll shirt? And what kinda symbol would she use anyways? It didn't seem right to use another troll's symbol or with their color, it was like. . .stealing their style! Or something.

John didn't have anymore time to think it over as you walked out of the bathroom, and back up to the mirror. You were wearing a black, short-sleeve T-shirt, with is 'Heir of Breath' symbol on the front in blue. You had put it over a long-sleeve shirt you were wearing before, so you somewhat resembled Kanaya, in style. But you would NE-VER wear a skirt, and Kohn and Kanaya both knew that. John said you looked great in them and should wear them more often despite knowing of your hate for the article of clothing. Could that have something to do with the pervy-ness Dave spoke of? Well, doesn't matter now, your wearing shorts and that's final. Plus, you're about to go to class and confront all your friends with the new symptom of your disease, and you were starting to get a bit nervous. It must have shown on your face, because you felt John place an arm over your shoulders and rub your arm comfortingly.

"Don't worry ____! You'll be fine. You've done awesome so far." John said, in an unusually quiet, yet calming voice. You smiled, and leaned into his side, laying your head on his shoulder.

"Thanks John." He smiled back, his own derpy way of saying 'welcome'.

You two stood there for a couple more minutes in comforting silence. That is, until John spoke up.

"Hey _____, . . . can I tell you something?" John asked, looking more serious than ever.

"Yeah John, shoot." He paused for a moment, seeming to think it over in his head. Then, he sighed, and turned you to face him. One of his hands cradling your face, while the other moved down to your hip, pulling you closer. You could've sworn you could have a heat stroke from the temperature of your face.

"_____, I l-"

"Hey Egbert! Where's my disk?" Dave bust into the room, completely ruining the moment. John face-palmed, then turned to the Strider.

"What Dave?!" John's lip was in a little pout, and his brows furrowed. Man, he's cute. Dave just poker faced back at him.

"My disk. Ya know, the one with all my latest songs on it? I need to show it to Terezi, but I never got it back from when I let you borrow it."

"And this couldn't have waited?" Dave crossed his arms.

"No dude, this is urgent." He nodded once for emphasis.

"How so?" You joined in with this question. Dave turned to you.

"Doesn't matter dudette." Dave then turned back to John, who did a 2x facepalm combo.

"This is legit?" John asked from under his hands.

"This is legit." Dave nodded once again for emphasis.

"Fine." John then rummaged through a drawer in his desk, proceeding to pull out a black disc and handing it to Dave.

"Thanks dude."

"No problem bro." John then held his fist out for a fist bump, which Dave answered with his own fist lightly punching John's.

"Oh yeah, dudette, before I go, Terezi told me to tell you something." Dave motioned for you to walk over with his finger. John raised an eyebrow, wondering what the blind moirail of Dave would want to tell you. You barely spend any time with her.

"Yeah Dave?" You walked up to him, and he placed a hand up to your ear like he was going to whisper something, then slid it behind your head. Before you had time to react Dave had thrusted you forward, and grabbed John's head as well, thrusting it forward. And with Dave's awesome coolness, he causes you two to lock lips perfectly, then he proceeded to detach his hands from your heads, and nod his own head once, before walking out.

"Have fun you two."

Neither of you heard Dave as you overcame the initial shock of the unexpected kiss, and started 'sucking each other's faces'. Not frenching, just really making out. You couldn't believe it was happening, and neither could John, but he was taking this chance. He slid one hand around your hip, pulling you close to him, so much so that even air itself couldn't slip between you two. The other entwined itself into your locks as your lips were locked on tight with his, and no one was cracking this safe.
Except Dave.

"And ____, don't let John into your pants just yet. Take it slooooooooow~ heh heh!" Dave peeked in to say, and then ran off chuckling as John chased him down the halls of the boy's dorm. You couldn't do anything but laugh. The derp was rubbing off on you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE END

EXTENDED ENDING

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"WHAT?! YOU HAVE HORNS NOW?! NO FUCKING WAY!" Karkat screamed as you sat down beside him, Karkles to your left, Sollux in front of you, he was sitting backwards in his chair.

"_____, you know I'm gone when the hornth come out. Tho-"

"Yeah, I know Sol. But you really shouldn't worry. I mean,it doesn't hurt, and this is a human disease, or at least, a disease humans get, not trolls." Sollux seemed skeptical, but shrugged.

"I'll thtill be keeping a bit of dithtanthe."

"I understand completely." You smiled at him, but that smile faded quickly when Karkat grabbed at your horns.

"AHA! THERE'S A HEADBAND HERE! WHAT THE EVER-LOVING FUCK ____?!?!" Karkat pulled the horns from your head, and a few people around started looking as he held them high over your head.

"Okay folks, i'll be taking crabby here before he makes a scene." Your friend, and Karkat's new girlfriend, walked up. She grabbed his hand, taking the horns and tossing them to you, before winking and dragging the yelling Cancer troll from the room.

"Tho thothe were-"

"Fake? Yes." John walked in and looked shocked to see the horns in your hands instead of on your head.

"____ what are you-!"

"Pranks over John, we've been caught."

"SO IT WAS A PRANK?!?!?"

"Karkat, get outta here you spaz."