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Description
I've been unhappy with my art lately, specifically with the eyes.

It doesn't help when everyone's like "Oh your art is so cute! Oh it's so pretty! Oh my gosh I want your style!" I mean... I can't say I'm not thankful for complements, but my the point is I'M not happy with my art. I don't really care what others think. I'm actually in a state where I quite dislike my art. And I hate it. Everyone else is so much better than me. I want to be able to render like others, to draw eyes like others, I want to draw anatomy as well as others. I've just been stuck in a rut for months and months and I hate so much. I don't like my redraws. I like the old versions better. I hate my style. It's so f-ing demotivating to see all these awesome artists and then have to look at my own art. I get so inspired then I look at my own art and hate it. I want to be as confident in my style as others. But I'm not. I feel so sucky because of it. And yet for some stupid reason I don't want to give up. But I do want to give up, but I can't. It just feels awful. It sucks.

Then people try to give advice and it's like, "Yep I did that. Yep I tried that. That's what I'm doing." And it's frustrating. I feel like nothing I do is helping. It's not like my personal life sucks either I have great friends, an amazing family, an amazing youth group, a roof over my head, food to eat. But still, it just sucks. I hate it. And I know it going to look at this tomorrow and be like "Oh my gosh, I was being so dramatic-" and maybe I am but it's how I feel. I'm scared to go back to public school after two years of homeschooling, technically 4 if you count lockdown. I feel like I have to draw to not feel like I'm doing nothing during the day except watching YouTube all day. My screen time is horrific. The amount of unfinished drawings in my gallery is awful. I hate looking at Pinterest anymore. I get so inspired then so demotivated when I actually want to draw. I jokingly say "Oh my gosh I hate my style, I want yours!!!!" But I mean it. And no one takes me serious because I'm joking. I'm the problem. And I feel like that ties back into my art somehow. I just hate it. No one's even going to read this.

Ironically, I ended up being happy with this art...

Description
I've been unhappy with my art lately, specifically with the eyes.

It doesn't help when everyone's like "Oh your art is so cute! Oh it's so pretty! Oh my gosh I want your style!" I mean... I can't say I'm not thankful for complements, but my the point is I'M not happy with my art. I don't really care what others think. I'm actually in a state where I quite dislike my art. And I hate it. Everyone else is so much better than me. I want to be able to render like others, to draw eyes like others, I want to draw anatomy as well as others. I've just been stuck in a rut for months and months and I hate so much. I don't like my redraws. I like the old versions better. I hate my style. It's so f-ing demotivating to see all these awesome artists and then have to look at my own art. I get so inspired then I look at my own art and hate it. I want to be as confident in my style as others. But I'm not. I feel so sucky because of it. And yet for some stupid reason I don't want to give up. But I do want to give up, but I can't. It just feels awful. It sucks.

Then people try to give advice and it's like, "Yep I did that. Yep I tried that. That's what I'm doing." And it's frustrating. I feel like nothing I do is helping. It's not like my personal life sucks either I have great friends, an amazing family, an amazing youth group, a roof over my head, food to eat. But still, it just sucks. I hate it. And I know it going to look at this tomorrow and be like "Oh my gosh, I was being so dramatic-" and maybe I am but it's how I feel. I'm scared to go back to public school after two years of homeschooling, technically 4 if you count lockdown. I feel like I have to draw to not feel like I'm doing nothing during the day except watching YouTube all day. My screen time is horrific. The amount of unfinished drawings in my gallery is awful. I hate looking at Pinterest anymore. I get so inspired then so demotivated when I actually want to draw. I jokingly say "Oh my gosh I hate my style, I want yours!!!!" But I mean it. And no one takes me serious because I'm joking. I'm the problem. And I feel like that ties back into my art somehow. I just hate it. No one's even going to read this.

Ironically, I ended up being happy with this art...