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It was snowing again. A wet, dreary snowfall that would never linger for long, but would momentarily transform the blackened streets into a pale white haven.

And before I knew it, it was that time of year again. The entire year had passed in a blur, almost as if I was racing time or running away from something. Just by living, waking up, each day had gone by and I had left them behind as I continued to trudge forward. So time, please pass on as quickly as you had been...

But I stopped. Time didn't stop, but I did. I stood in front of a music store in the busy shopping district as I felt a snowflake melt on my nose. I looked up, uncaring that I had been blocking people from the entrance, and saw the first snowflakes fall. Almost as if I had just been woken up from a dream, I hazily noticed the Christmas decorations on the many display windows along the block. I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach as I took out my cell phone and flipped it open. The date was December 24. Christmas Eve.

It's the eve of the day commemorating the birth of Jesus. You had said. I had replied that of course I knew this and gotten a questioning look in response. "Why am I remembering this now..." I questioned myself and fought to push the memory away. I resumed walking home at a brisk pace, turned a corner, walked past the Christmas tree set up in the square... We had stood in front of a glimmering tree, holding hands... I angrily brushed off the snow from my shoulders and edged myself through a crowd of high school students. One of them shouted an insult to my back and I felt the urge to turn around. If they wanted to pick a fight then that was fine by me, anything to distract from this...

I opened the door to my apartment, shook the snow from my shoes and struggled to locate my slippers. The room was dark, despite it being early afternoon. I turned on the lights and headed straight to my room, sparing a quick glance at the adjacent closed door. My roommate was spending the holidays with her family in London; she wouldn't be back until the start of the term. When I entered my room the first thing I noticed was the bright snow falling gently behind my windowsill. I threw down my bag on my chair and hastened to close the curtains. Without even bothering to turn on the lights, I plopped down on my bed. I stared at the ceiling for several minutes, even closing my eyes at times but still feeling the bright white glare that shone through the edge of the curtains. Whenever it snowed the usual blue sky would turn to a glaring white that seemed to swallow everything.

My mind wandered, and for a brief moment I was walking through the mall, bustling with shoppers and its ceiling decorated with festive stars and streamers. You were clutching my arm and I didn't dare to look in your direction lest you see the blush on my face. Then we were running along the snow-covered sidewalks towards the approaching street car… Then we were lying in the fresh snow making snow angels, staring up at the stars… I turned and looked to my right, expecting to see… But as I opened my eyes all I saw was the blank wall and the many posters whose edges were beginning to peel. I didn't even notice the tears that were coming to my eyes, I simply closed them and fell into a deep slumber… Perhaps, in my dreams, I would see you again…