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Description
Feelings

Awake since two am and at five the music dies down to leave me with my thoughts and the sound of pouring rain. I lie contemplating to write, and then picking up the tools I haven’t used in over a month, I write out my thoughts.

Yesterday I spent the day with someone I love, someone I value more than myself. She and I lay together for pretty much the whole mid afternoon, just talking and kissing, but nothing more. In some ways though, though few, I’m glad it was nothing more – I don’t want to rush things, as to not ruin whatever slight chance I have. Yet I want to be with her so much. To be the one she loves the most, I haven’t felt that for too long, and to be the one person that cares for her, to give my pointless life meaning.

The rain still batters down and still my mind ticks on about her. That girl, the one I know I love. The only thing I’m sure about right now. For the past three hours I have lay thinking about her, different situations and scenarios that would maybe lead to happiness. I try to come up with negative points about her, yet I cant, even if she did mention a couple to me yesterday. Sure, everyone has imperfections; I just don’t see one in her.

I don’t want to ever think of her as a no go, ever. She’s someone I cant live without. Probably more so if I was with her. I’m not strong, mentally, I mean. Not strong enough to be alone, yet I feel I am everyday and it’s been s long. If I was religious I suppose I’d say, “Please God, let it happen.” Though “God” would probably tell me to fuck off.

Rain still pours,
Mind ticks on.
Heart still desires.

Love struck? Probably. Very much so. And yet she still loves my best mate, how ironic, no? My own best friend threw away something I’d die for. Brilliant.

Lay there, mid-afternoon; her in my arms and us both very nearly asleep was so… perfect. So great. She’s so… heh… dear to me. So priceless and I know I’m selfish but to not want to be with her would not make sense.

Maybe I’ll show her this, I don’t know… maybe?

I’ll always be there for her, I have to be, I wouldn’t trust anyone else. I wont like to trust anyone else to be with her, because I don’t think anyone but me would treat her right, though that’s egotistical and probably wrong, its what I feel.

I love you hen,

Rob.

Description
Feelings

Awake since two am and at five the music dies down to leave me with my thoughts and the sound of pouring rain. I lie contemplating to write, and then picking up the tools I haven’t used in over a month, I write out my thoughts.

Yesterday I spent the day with someone I love, someone I value more than myself. She and I lay together for pretty much the whole mid afternoon, just talking and kissing, but nothing more. In some ways though, though few, I’m glad it was nothing more – I don’t want to rush things, as to not ruin whatever slight chance I have. Yet I want to be with her so much. To be the one she loves the most, I haven’t felt that for too long, and to be the one person that cares for her, to give my pointless life meaning.

The rain still batters down and still my mind ticks on about her. That girl, the one I know I love. The only thing I’m sure about right now. For the past three hours I have lay thinking about her, different situations and scenarios that would maybe lead to happiness. I try to come up with negative points about her, yet I cant, even if she did mention a couple to me yesterday. Sure, everyone has imperfections; I just don’t see one in her.

I don’t want to ever think of her as a no go, ever. She’s someone I cant live without. Probably more so if I was with her. I’m not strong, mentally, I mean. Not strong enough to be alone, yet I feel I am everyday and it’s been s long. If I was religious I suppose I’d say, “Please God, let it happen.” Though “God” would probably tell me to fuck off.

Rain still pours,
Mind ticks on.
Heart still desires.

Love struck? Probably. Very much so. And yet she still loves my best mate, how ironic, no? My own best friend threw away something I’d die for. Brilliant.

Lay there, mid-afternoon; her in my arms and us both very nearly asleep was so… perfect. So great. She’s so… heh… dear to me. So priceless and I know I’m selfish but to not want to be with her would not make sense.

Maybe I’ll show her this, I don’t know… maybe?

I’ll always be there for her, I have to be, I wouldn’t trust anyone else. I wont like to trust anyone else to be with her, because I don’t think anyone but me would treat her right, though that’s egotistical and probably wrong, its what I feel.

I love you hen,

Rob.