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With a sigh Mel removed her shirt, walking in front of the bathroom mirror. The bathroom door was open, and she could see the kitchen window in the mirror behind her. Mel watched lights go on and off in the neighbors house...as they moved from room to room. Focusing her gaze on herself, she undid the bra. Nothing to surprising here. It was her. Everything she hated. Every damned inch of teenage angst, rolled into one bag of pale flesh. The lower ribs peeked at her, and Mel traced they’re outlines. “God...” She muttered out loud. Not really wanting to stare at her horrid self any longer, she backed away. Leaning nude in the door-frame of her bathroom, she glanced down at her arm. One mistake after another all in a pretty little scabbed row. Her best friend’s worry, and mother’s biggest fear...That Mel isn’t perfect...isn’t happy. Hasn’t -been- happy for a long fucking time. Hell, have a drug-dealing hippie on weed tell you that “Your a cold and rude young lady” doesn't exactly help your self image. It was true though, old Dadd-o D. didn’t stop by to see his “cold and rude” daughter. In fact, rumor has it his girlfriend forced the old shit. His father died of brain cancer...and his girlfriend has to force to him to go home and say goodbye. “Hell why not stop by and see your daughter....she might look different now. Hell it‘s been eight years.” rolling her eyes, Mel grabbed hold of the door and slammed it as hard as she could into it’s frame. “FUCK YOU”...Slamming her behind against the top of the toilet, Mel dug her teeth into her tongue to keep from screaming again. It didn’t help with the tears. She didn't expect it would. Glancing towards the bathtub, she grabbed the handle; turning the water towards the red area.
In thirty minutes steam covered the bathroom hemisphere...So many things had happened here. The bathroom...or the ‘rest’ room wasn’t letting her rest at all like it would normally. Dipping her head back into the scolding hot water, Mel winced. Of course it stung...burned. She wasn’t going act like it didn't. No need to act stuff when your alone. She stopped when the back of her head was submerged, holding it in place. The bathroom was her haven. Her safe place...and the only place were she could go and lock the door with getting into trouble or questioned. “What would happen...if I went under...and never came up?” She thought, and further back her head went into the gray bath water. “What would the doctors tell my mother...Of course, right off they would know it was a suicide case. What did my friend tell me about cutting? ‘That's not a big deal, everyone does it.’ Now I’m glad I didn’t tell him. God knows I can’t be like everyone. I have to rise above. Be more then I am. A worthless whore.”....Glancing down at her arm Mel sat up, and started to pick away at the scabs. “One little piggy went to market. One little piggy...did something else...Fuck I forget.” Dragging her nails across her arm, Mel slide back into the tub. “Everyone's having sex right now too, I suppose. Maybe I should jump on the hay wagon! Or ...orgy. Hell...why not drugs! Everyone's fucking hurting themselves aren’t they? STD’s...Murder of brain. If everyone's doing it! Why the fuck can’t I just get it over with...We all die eventually .Everyone is fucking doing it. I’m not any different. Everyone’s doing it. “ Sliding further into the tub, Mel closed her eyes...inhaled deeply what she thought might be her last breath, and slid in.
Opening her eyes...Mel wasn’t sure what she was hearing. Feeling light-headed, she wasn’t she if the ringing was her...or the phone. Forcing herself up, Mel flung her dizzy self over the side of the tub. Acid filling her esophagus, and forced it’s way out onto the tile floor. Slamming her head against the tub’s side, Mel head seared with pain. “Oh shit..” Hearing the telephone again she pulled her self over the edge. Mel spilled onto the floor, ignored regurgitated stomach fluids...and stood up. Reaching for the cordless phone, she had taken to the bathroom with her; Mel pressed talk. “Hello..” Her voice was weak, and scratchy. “What’s wrong with you?” An older females voice replied. “Nothing Mom. I just woke up.”