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StraightJacketRed — Say It... [NSFW]
Published: 2008-07-12 04:13:16 +0000 UTC; Views: 230; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 2
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Description My mouth is open, my heart is pure.
I raise my hand to all those who bur.
My mind is accepting, eyes looking.
I raise fists to those who are hooking.

My mind longing, for freedom and hope.
My song will be sung by all who love,
for they wish for a future and don’t mope.
My hands have will, on with the gloves.

I am told that people have no voice,
I am told that the world is dark and wrong.
I am here, ready and willing, im here and poised.
Tell them that the world is without a song.

“Speaking, thinking, loving? What is such a thing?”
Said the man who has no voice.
“I say what they want me to, and nothing more I bring.”
I know that its true, the world is not nice.

Its not just truth, but now lies forbid!
“Fuck, shit, damn? They’re bad words! Morbid!”
Said the woman with no thought.
“They are forbidden words that will never be spoken.”

Why must we beware? Why must we talk half tied.
Why must we speak with no thought, living a lie!
Say what you want, I say, and not BS I don’t buy!
Say right, say wrong. Speak the truth or a lie!
Say it, don’t be afraid, it needs to be said, don’t die.

Say it
Let it out
Scream
Speak
Talk

Say a word, something you think you’ll regret,

You wont, if you really mean it.

Don’t forget, they died for our freedom, lets use it...
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Comments: 29

Cooper1994 [2009-04-26 19:50:41 +0000 UTC]

Well, that is awesome. Well done. I'm a fellow writer, but half the time I can't write poetry to save my life, so I am seriously in awe right now. And I have the smiley to prove it. *searches back pockets*

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StraightJacketRed In reply to Cooper1994 [2009-04-27 04:18:37 +0000 UTC]



I've honestly lost interest in poetry, I started writing poetry because I thought it would help my fiction.

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thetawave2 [2009-01-20 18:01:37 +0000 UTC]

I wonder why the first stanza has a different rhyme scheme from the subsequent ones. I like the way the repetition in the piece helps create a mood of rage. I think you do a good job of portraying the cynical man, but I’m not sure what purpose the woman in the next stanza serves. I think this piece needs a bit more direction and focus as a whole. You’ve got the feeling there, and your call to speak is very emphatic, but what’s the point of it all? Just to speak? What is your motivation? What do you want to be said? How do you want freedom of speech to be used? This piece would be much more meaningful if you gave it… well… meaning.

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StraightJacketRed In reply to thetawave2 [2009-01-20 22:21:13 +0000 UTC]

i tried to make it change around so that it would not be as boring.

simple is better, confusing your reader with long, indescribable meanings that only a few could really understand really goes well. though the meaning is not the psychology of the universe, it is a common and easy to understand thought.

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Jarrad113 [2008-08-27 16:53:34 +0000 UTC]

TRUTH!

We can whine all day about what is wrong in the world or just shine with our own light of positivity.

Good stuff and thanks for the watch.

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StraightJacketRed In reply to Jarrad113 [2008-08-27 19:32:07 +0000 UTC]

thanks!

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The-Fattness [2008-08-26 11:35:34 +0000 UTC]

Very cool Love it!

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StraightJacketRed In reply to The-Fattness [2008-08-26 18:57:59 +0000 UTC]

^^ thanks

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The-Fattness In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-08-26 20:22:39 +0000 UTC]

Your welcome

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Mirrorakay [2008-07-28 19:13:03 +0000 UTC]

Excellent work!

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StraightJacketRed In reply to Mirrorakay [2008-07-28 22:00:29 +0000 UTC]

thanks!

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morbidthegrim [2008-07-17 14:15:07 +0000 UTC]

This has been featured here: [link] Please let me know if you would like it removed.

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StraightJacketRed In reply to morbidthegrim [2008-07-17 21:32:56 +0000 UTC]

hell no, keep it there! thanks!!!

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CaptainQuirk [2008-07-13 03:45:55 +0000 UTC]

I like it. I know what it's like to be surrounded by people who one just can't communicate with.

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StraightJacketRed In reply to CaptainQuirk [2008-07-13 04:05:12 +0000 UTC]

thank you very much! people no longer say what they're feeling, try to hide it, try to imitate others and they want to be popular by taking their own personalty's and throwing them to the wind.

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CaptainQuirk In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-07-13 04:34:26 +0000 UTC]

That, unfortunately, has become the main theme of 80% of my poetry. -.- Angry poetry is almost as good as speaking out in class (better, because when I speak out in class I have to deal with interruptions and mean glares as well).

[link]
[link]
[link]
And so on.
(don't feel like you have to read all/any - I'm just tossing them out there)

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StraightJacketRed In reply to CaptainQuirk [2008-07-13 05:57:05 +0000 UTC]

im out of school
and that is cool!
so are you poems
they stand like totems!

if you'd like
might I suggest?
Something out of the blue?
don’t worry, its not a test.

I like this a lot
though you don’t have to read!
its my fiction of funny,
don’t heed! [link]

I liked you poems a lot!
I didn’t think I would,
but I faved them all,
they're very good!

I hope to see more
in the coming days
oh! and another one!
by the bays! [link]

you don’t have to read them,
though it would be great that you would
I'll end this rhyme
as I should!

sorry, but I do that to some people some times! hope to see more soon!

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CaptainQuirk In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-07-13 16:30:19 +0000 UTC]

Ahahaha. Very creative.

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StraightJacketRed In reply to CaptainQuirk [2008-07-13 20:01:26 +0000 UTC]

i do that sometimes, lol

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XpiKch3rXfRAmeX [2008-07-12 04:19:53 +0000 UTC]

Aw, sweet. I think this is the first written thing I've favorited here.
Nicely done.

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StraightJacketRed In reply to XpiKch3rXfRAmeX [2008-07-12 04:32:48 +0000 UTC]

thank you very much! written work isn't looked at as much as the painting and drawing.

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HeartofMischief In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-08-30 16:44:15 +0000 UTC]

that is so true!!!!

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StraightJacketRed In reply to HeartofMischief [2008-08-30 22:18:43 +0000 UTC]

YES!

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HeartofMischief In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-08-31 00:19:01 +0000 UTC]

it hurts!!!

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StraightJacketRed In reply to HeartofMischief [2008-08-31 00:26:34 +0000 UTC]

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HeartofMischief In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-08-31 00:39:27 +0000 UTC]

lolz

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StraightJacketRed In reply to HeartofMischief [2008-08-31 05:03:13 +0000 UTC]

come on, you saw that coming.

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HeartofMischief In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-08-31 16:41:19 +0000 UTC]

yeah kinda!!!!

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XpiKch3rXfRAmeX In reply to StraightJacketRed [2008-07-16 04:27:49 +0000 UTC]

You're very welcome. <3

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