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tskye — Walk
Published: 2007-01-13 22:24:18 +0000 UTC; Views: 628; Favourites: 8; Downloads: 15
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Description
Along the field I walk alone,Stepping on twigs, leaves and stones,
I walk alone and think about,
The man I knew who will do me proud.
Enjoying the breeze upon my face,
Slowly drowing in your loving gaze,
Feeling your presence though you're far,
My ineffable joy is what you are.
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Comments: 14
reading that poem bring to me the feelings you describe in your author comments. even in the wilderness of a lonesome field you have the comfort of anothers presence. Makes me think of a bright summers day too
love it
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its so simple, yet it still holds great understanding. luvs it
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OMFG TSKYE. I Love your poetry. (: // Insert adoration smily here // (I can't put it in and I dunno why D: -tear-) ANYWWAY. This soo deserves my favs <3
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Yay for titles. 
The last line in the first stanza "The man I knew I'd be proud of" doesn't seem to fit with the subtle rhyming scheme that's happening in the other lines. Threw me off when I read it out loud.
But it's a very well written poem, besides.
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I was waiting for someone to comment about that part..or else I'll be too hesitant to change that line...
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But putting that line you said down "the man I knew who will do me proud" would work better, I think
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& I thought you were gonna have supper and do homework
muhahahaha!
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supper's in the oven and now I'm off to do homework
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supper for you, breakfast for me. yes, i'm off to do my homework as well
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