HOME | DD

Description
/* Journal Clean-Up */ body div#devskin13506496 * { background:none; padding:0; margin:0; border:none; font-family:'Open Sans', sans-serif; } body div#devskin13506496 .gr { padding:0!important; margin-bottom:-3px; } body div#devskin13506496 .gr-top img, body div#devskin13506496 .gr1, body div#devskin13506496 .gr2, body div#devskin13506496 .gr3 { display:none; } body div#devskin13506496 a.external:after { display:none; } body div#devskin13506496 .user-symbol { font-size:0.7em; margin-left:2px; } /* Normal Thumb Styling */ body div#devskin13506496 .shadow-holder { vertical-align:middle; margin:3px; } body div#devskin13506496 .shadow-holder img { padding:10px; background:#fff; margin:1px; } body div#devskin13506496 img.lit { display:none; } body div#devskin13506496 .shadow-holder:hover { padding:0!important; } body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-deviation img, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-freeform-deviation { padding:10px; background:#fff; width:97%; } body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-deviation img:hover { } /* Normal Lit Thumb Styling */ body div#devskin13506496 .lit { margin:1px; width:180px; height:160px; box-shadow:none; -moz-box-shadow:none; -webkit-box-shadow:none; background:#fff; } body div#devskin13506496 q { margin-left:-15px; font-weight:normal!important; } body div#devskin13506496 q strong { margin:10px 0; } body div#devskin13506496 q img { border:none!important; outline:none!important; } /* Big Gallery Code */ body div#devskin13506496 .big .shadow-holder { display:inline-block; width:200px; height:200px; overflow:hidden; } body div#devskin13506496 .big .shadow-holder img { max-width:none; margin:-1px 0 0 -1px; padding:0px; } body div#devskin13506496 .big .lit { width:200px; height:200px; } body div#devskin13506496 .big .shadow-holder:hover img, body div#devskin13506496 .big .shadow-holder:hover .lit { background:#fff!important; } /* Mini Gallery Code */ body div#devskin13506496 .mini .shadow-holder { display:inline-block; background:#fff; width:100px; height:100px; overflow:hidden; } body div#devskin13506496 .mini .shadow-holder img { padding:0px; max-width:none; margin:-1px 0 0 -1px; } body div#devskin13506496 .mini .lit { width:170px; height:150px; } body div#devskin13506496 .mini .shadow-holder:hover img, body div#devskin13506496 .mini .shadow-holder:hover .lit { position:absolute!important; z-index:2; margin:10px 0 0 -50px; padding:10px; } body div#devskin13506496 .b .shadow-holder:hover img, body div#devskin13506496 .b .shadow-holder:hover .lit, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-deviation img:hover, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-freeform-deviation:hover { background:#5f4848; } body div#devskin13506496 .g .shadow-holder:hover img, body div#devskin13506496 .g .shadow-holder:hover .lit, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-deviation img:hover, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-freeform-deviation:hover { background:#9fce54; } body div#devskin13506496 .y .shadow-holder:hover img, body div#devskin13506496 .y .shadow-holder:hover .lit, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-deviation img:hover, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-freeform-deviation:hover { background:#ffa53a; } body div#devskin13506496 .shadow-holder:hover img, body div#devskin13506496 .shadow-holder:hover .lit, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-deviation img:hover, body div#devskin13506496 .embedded-freeform-deviation:hover { background:#ff5075; } body div#devskin13506496 .mini.b .shadow-holder:hover { background:#5f4848; } body div#devskin13506496 .mini.g .shadow-holder:hover { background:#9fce54; } body div#devskin13506496 .mini.y .shadow-holder:hover { background:#ffa53a; } body div#devskin13506496 .mini .shadow-holder:hover { background:#ff5075; } /* Journal Top */ body div#devskin13506496 .gr-box { background:url('https://fc07.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/244/4/7/whitecustom_by_simplysilent-d6kp6dh.png'); } body div#devskin13506496 .gr-top { background:#2F4F4F; padding:70px 0 40px 0; text-align:center; } body div#devskin13506496 .gr-top h2 { background:#8FBC8F; } body div#devskin13506496 .gr-top h2, body div#devskin13506496 .gr-top h2 a, body div#devskin13506496 .commentslink { text-transform:uppercase; text-align:center; letter-spacing:2px; padding:5px 20px; font-size:15px; display:inline-block; margin:0 auto; color:#fff; } body div#devskin13506496 .gr-top h2:hover { padding:5px 40px; background:#ffa53a; } body div#devskin13506496 .timestamp { display:block; color:#fff; padding:5px; text-transform:uppercase; letter-spacing:2px; } /* Journal Text */ body div#devskin13506496 .text { padding:60px 8%; } body div#devskin13506496 .text, body div#devskin13506496 .content { font-family:'Open Sans'; font-size:14px; } body div#devskin13506496 .left, body div#devskin13506496 .right { width:48%; } body div#devskin13506496 .right { float:right; } body div#devskin13506496 .left { float:left; } body div#devskin13506496 .text a { color:#ff5075; font-weight:bold; text-decoration:none; } body div#devskin13506496 .text a:hover { color:#ffa53a; } /* Box and Square Headings */ body div#devskin13506496 h1, body div#devskin13506496 h2 { text-transform:uppercase; font-weight:normal; font-size:16px; font-weight:bold; font-family:'open sans'; } body div#devskin13506496 h1 { letter-spacing:2px; padding:10px; text-align:center; background:#8FBC8F; color:#fff; } body div#devskin13506496 .text h2 { padding-left:10px; letter-spacing:1px; margin:5px 0 -5px 0; border-left:20px solid #ffa53a; } body div#devskin13506496 h1:hover, body div#devskin13506496 h2:hover { font-weight:bold; } body div#devskin13506496 .p1 { background:#ff5075; } body div#devskin13506496 .b1 { background:#5f4848; } body div#devskin13506496 .g1 { background:#9fce54; } body div#devskin13506496 .p2 { border-left:20px solid #ff5075!important; } body div#devskin13506496 .b2 { border-left:20px solid #5f4848!important; } body div#devskin13506496 .g2 { border-left:20px solid #9fce54!important; } body div#devskin13506496 blockquote { padding:10px 3%; background:rgb(95, 72, 72); background:rgba(95,72,72, 0.1); } body div#devskin13506496 .clear { clear:both; } body div#devskin13506496 ul, body div#devskin13506496 ol { margin-left:30px; } body div#devskin13506496 ul li { list-style:square url('https://fc09.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2013/271/e/3/bulletbrown_by_simplysilent-d6oci8y.png'); } /* Journal Bottom */ body div#devskin13506496 li .f, body div#devskin13506496 li.f.a { background:transparent; } body div#devskin13506496 .list li { font-size:10px; } body div#devskin13506496 .list img { display:none; } body div#devskin13506496 .f.list { position:absolute; bottom:20px; color:#fff; text-transform:uppercase; letter-spacing:2px; } body div#devskin13506496 .bottom { background:#2F4F4F no-repeat 97% 45px; padding:50px 0; } body div#devskin13506496 .commentslink { background:#8FBC8F; bottom:40px; font-weight:bold; padding:8px 20px; } body div#devskin13506496 .commentslink:hover { text-decoration:none; background:#8FBC8F; padding:8px 40px; }

[Itachi x reader]
Warning: Mentions of abuse and depression.

Your lips would stretch into the sweetest of smiles upon his arrival– so eager would you wait for him to come to you. Your eyes would spark in utter joy; a silent greeting would be written in them. And then you would run into his open arms, beyond glad to have your dear friend back from yet another dangerous mission. No sight of inner troubles would be showing on his exhausted features.

Back then, so many things lighted up his heart; he wished he had never been forced to take the job which had made him depart from you–so precious to him–soon after accomplishing it.

Itachi had crossed paths with you few times after that, and he had been witness to the damage he had inflicted. There was no trace of the cheerful girl you had always been – only the remembrance of a happy life remained, drawn on the wrinkles at both sides of your mouth. Albeit expressionless, a glint of despair shone in your gaze as it caught his whenever you had walked by. Other than a void glance, you had refused to stop and give him the punishment he so much deserved – it unnerved him at times; why did you not attack him?

He had taken everything from you, and the man hated himself for that. It couldn't be helped, though; he was only a pawn in that world.

You had given him your trust, devoted yourself to him unconditionally. You had not seen it coming, but then again, who could have? After years of friendship, in which he had protected you from silly fears, in which he had cared for you; to think he would take advantage of such reliance –

Itachi stopped his trail of thoughts, mentally shook his head and focused his red eyes on your miserable form. There he was again, with that blank expression plastered on his face, staring down at you as if you were a mere bug – ready to destroy your life, which you had worked so hard to repair.

His stomach gave a painful twist as he caught glimpse of the smile on your lips. You had been so reckless, assuming he was done torturing you–he was just waiting for the proper moment to break through again, take everyone and everything away and make a mess out of you like the first time.

“Why won’t you just kill me?”

Your voice, so drained of energy – no longer did you feel like standing up –, echoed within the four walls in which you had been dropped. It was but a soft whisper, yet enough to evoke guilt in his heart. The look in your eyes, he knew he wouldn’t forget – just as he still remembered the betrayed expression on your face when he had crushed you many years ago. Looking into them, Itachi felt his façade crumble at his feet; but he couldn’t waver.

“I’m dead anyway, can’t you see?” you mumbled; hands on the ground, gaze fixed on his impassive one.

He could – how could he not? The last bit of happiness had dissipated in thin air, leaving a broken soul behind. Dull, cold were your eyes; pale, void of that lovely spark of which he had grown so fond when you were kids. A silent pleading shone in them, one so easy to read yet so painful to face.

Itachi titled his head and looked out of the window. It was snowing; white flakes fell from the cloudy sky – you had been like that, once in a lifetime; so innocent, carefree and pure. Guilt built up inside his chest, eating at him and spreading throughout his body like a shook of electricity.

The sword – tainted in blood – clattered against the cold ground to lie in between the mass of dead bodies, before he headed to the door.

“Live for another day, [Name]–”

“–so that you can keep killing me.”

His eyes shut tightly, but he pushed the guilt to the back of his heart – where he would not feel it – and forced himself to keep walking.