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xXinksXx — Prologue: Mirrored Secrets
Published: 2011-11-10 09:34:19 +0000 UTC; Views: 2979; Favourites: 31; Downloads: 27
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Description
Next Chapters:Chapter 1: Captivity
Chapter 2: Eyes of a Demon; Face of an Angel
The name is subject to change because my friend/editor was unimpressed with the original name "The Demon Gladiator", OR the alternate name "Falling for a Demon" saying the first didn't grab her attention and the second sounded like a bad smutty romance novel, so Imma try this one on for size.
Feedback? Thoughts? Questions? Story name suggestions? LoL
Let me know what you think! "If you don't like it, feel free to yell at me! " as !Mpoor would say.Preview Picture by `hakubaikou
Link to Original: [link]
(R.I.P. Hakubaikou)
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Comments: 36
i clicked the cookie and it brought me here to this very enjoyable piece of work!
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Yay! I'm very glad you liked it! 
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Did you like what the cookie showed you? 
Tell me what you think~! Poke the llama!!!!
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I do~ 
I hope you read and enjoyed
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Hello, I popped by as promised! I really enjoyed reading this. I'm not sure if you would have read anything by him, but I'm currently reading a book by Ian Irvine from a trilogy called 'Shadow on the Glass', your female character here really reminds me of one of his protagonists - she also has red hair and was captured and made a slave. It's not very often that I read something so vivid that it makes me think of other stories. Great work!
As for any feedback, I hope I don't upset your editor but I found a few little nit-picky bits:
Second paragraph - I think it should read 'her body wasn't used to'
Kaput Mundi – not sure if I like that name – Kaput just sounds too much like a play on words – this may or may not be intentional, but it sounds like you couldn’t think of anything else to allude to the end of the world or a large threat
Seventh paragraph - 'someone' – one word
Second section, second paragraph - 'suspecting a trick'
I hope this helps and you don't think I'm just being a bitch! I really enjoyed reading it, keep it up!
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Thanks so much! 
As for the feedback, I'll check out the word problems and fix them - this needed going over with more of a fine tooth comb than I did, so I probably missed a few things. Thanks for helping me! To be honest my friend/editor took so long getting to these to edit them, that I just went ahead and posted them. She's been stressed out with exams and moving, so I didn't press her about it. 
As for Kaput Mundi, that was an actual name used for Rome in the time period this is based in - it means "Capital City". I did a little bit of research for names of places - like Eire for Ireland and what not. Maura is also an Irish name
I'm really glad you enjoyed this!! 
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Ha, no problem, I don't mind feedback either as long as it isn't just opinionated twaddle - if you have a point it needs to be backed up, doesn't it?
I knew Eire was for Ireland (I'm English after all) and I recognised Maura (similar to Moira) - but I have to admit I'd never heard of Kaput Mundi, so I stand corrected. I just know of Kaput as meaning over or finished, so I assumed you were alluding to a group of people planning to destroy everything
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Oh! Okay! I see what you meant now
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I CLICKED THE COOKIE .. Then i went back just to click the lama!
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What did you think of them?
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I think that these are genius! < that how u spell it xD (?) I will read them ^^
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Awe! Thank you!
And your spelling is superb
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( Did I spell superb right?)
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Idk ! XDi think so XD ... Urwelcome and thanx ^^
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What do you think of the story?
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ohohoho but I already have
AND LOVE THEM I DO!
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YAY!!! Thank you so much!!!!! I am posting a new chapter within the next few days
Also: if you are bored between now and then read this lovely bunch of fun: Curiosity Killed the Elf Ch1: Lesson 1 - Never Trust Inanimate Objects !
It's also going to get updated soon!
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xD Haha! Don't look at me - the llama stole it
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Okay... then, you owe me your llama!
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I is mad, so very, very mad, yah.
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Awe no has to be mad - Llama-san is waiting for you back on your page
But never show it cookies. I once held one out to it and I now have to type half of this message with my metal hook.
Well, I guess you could tell it that annoying people have cookies in their back pocket. Just be sure to point it in the right direction.
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*hides bag of cookies*
Cookies =/= proper llama-friendship-building agent
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Ohhh! Will there be more on the way????? I like it, it's a good prolog. Caught my interest. Poor girl... 
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Yup yup - this is a story I am doing for NaNoWriMo (where you have to write 50K words in a month). I'm hoping to finish this by December 1st
Things definitely get a little hectic in Maura's life, but I'm hoping the ending will be a good one. See, I actually randomly had a dream about this whole story, but I woke up before I could find out the ending, so I don't know how it ends yet either 
There's already a chapter 1 posted if you'd like to read it! You can find the link to it in the artist comments. If it has trouble loading on your screen, there is a link in the Chapter 1 artist comments where it links you to a non pdf format of the story
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NaNoWriMo huh, didn't hear about that.
A dream? Nice! That sounds fun! Dreams that turn into stories are awesome!
I found it.
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Check it out on NaNoWriMo.com - it's really awesome! You get to meet cool people through it too
Thanks for letting me know about the pdf. Guess it's just some people's internet connection
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That sounds pretty cool!
Sure, not a problem!
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