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YamiSelina β€” The Darkness within

Published: 2013-03-13 00:06:44 +0000 UTC; Views: 47; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 0
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Description I created my monsters so they could protect me
I fled from reality so that no one could reach me
That no one could hurt me that no would would doubt me
And now that I am save from them
The darkness within comes out, to take control
to talk me down, to make me feel
useless, empty, left behind.
How should I fight my own thoughts?
How could they be possibly wrong?
Their words make sense
My heart just cries
Their logic applies
My soul falls apart
You are nothing
I am nothing
You are worthless
I am worthless
You are a mistake
I am a mistake

And nothing more
And nothing more..
And nothing more...?





Ah great, more depressing stuff. Sorry for spamming your inbox, sorry for getting on your nerves.
And now it's 2 am = I'll never get even 4 hours of sleep. While my lack of sleep is probably the source of my depression... Good night, everyone.

Good night...



Update at 3 am:
Ah well, already feeling a bit better so please just ignore this
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Comments: 10

DuskyScales [2013-03-15 00:24:45 +0000 UTC]

i love this monster. *-* love its pose, too!
good to know you've gotten over the depression a bit.

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YamiSelina In reply to DuskyScales [2013-03-15 12:38:26 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much! ^^
Yeah, I think I'm over it, the only thing to handle is the aggression now...

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Robo-Shark [2013-03-13 14:48:26 +0000 UTC]

Wow, your writing for this is really good too...I'm really glad you're feeling a bit better now. Vent art can be really powerful, and your monster design here is so cool. We really do create our monsters to help shield us sometimes. It's amazing how our creative side comes up with ways to cope.

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YamiSelina In reply to Robo-Shark [2013-03-13 16:27:17 +0000 UTC]

Thank you ^-^ I never really wrote any English poems before
Yes and hopefully I'll get more sleep tonight since
less sleep = more depressive
more sleep = less depressive
Indeed, I guess I should do that a bit more often
Thank you ^^ I was thinking about adding eyes first, but... Nah, why following the standard specifications of nature?
Yeah, I think that a few months or so ago, I've split my personality into many different so I had someone to talk to.. as crazy as that sounds
(But at least Elocar was born this way, since one of my demons drew him first )

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Robo-Shark In reply to YamiSelina [2013-03-13 20:07:27 +0000 UTC]

You did an amazing job, especially if English isn't your first language! Get reeest D:

I like that it has no eyes! Kind of like blinding out the things that hurt you around you...I have a lot of characters born from personalities in my head too

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YamiSelina In reply to Robo-Shark [2013-03-26 18:41:17 +0000 UTC]

Thank you!

(I have the feeling this was the 10,000 I've posted today )

Well yes, when I think of it, it seems my OC's contain parts of my personality. For example, RarΓ©, seeing how he has to live with the burden of what he's done and never being able to forget it (Schlecki, my poor bunny, died in an accident, when my sofa bed collapsed because I was on it... I didn't knew it was going to collapse but now she's gone forever )
Or Belial, often smiling on the inside but still... Some sort of neglect on his inside. Desiree, seeing how she has no feelings (I have feelings, yes, but I was threatened like I had none and so I tend to pretend I really had none) or Waffle, who is really shy and doesn't know what to do when someone talks to her; I'm not that extreme but I often feel the same. Garcia, someone who loves to kill people (I'd sometimes love to although I never did) yet on the other hand, being a complete psychopath and acting without any good reasons (When *DESTRUCTION-BUNNY once visited me we bathe with our clothes in the fountain of my city). Shatan, having no friends and saying that he doesn't need them, yet somehow touched when someone became his friend.
But oh, this is getting waaay too long

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Robo-Shark In reply to YamiSelina [2013-03-28 19:38:02 +0000 UTC]

Lol! Yeah some of my characters have parts of my personality, Rafe is the closest to who I am, though he's allowed to act out his anger a lot more than me. Without him to stab and gut the nearest human who makes him mad, I'd probably go nuts :V He deals with the bigotry and hate that people aim at him too.

I'm so sorry about your bunny, that's awful! :C It's nobody's fault when horrible accidents like that happen though. It's fun when we can relate to our characters, sometimes we don't even mean to make them like us but they end up a little that way anyway - sounds like a lot of yours have similarities to you c: I know the feeling of wanting to kill too, lol.

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YamiSelina In reply to Robo-Shark [2013-03-30 23:16:29 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, although many NT's ( [link] ) can't understand that because they think it makes people more aggressive when they write about things like that. Obviously. Jar, har.

Yeah... And it really is true, Hope dies last, she's my last bunny alive (of 3). >.> I'd love to buy another one to accompany her but the problem is the illness that killed the other 2; it's infectious and can either kill a bunny soon or let them live for years. And all those "It's cruel just to have one bunny alone" comments on the internet make me feel worse as well. I mean hell, what am I supposed to do? To buy another bunny she can love that dies next? @-@

True!

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Robo-Shark In reply to YamiSelina [2013-04-01 15:42:25 +0000 UTC]

I think it depends on the person, but having things like violent movies and games helps me to stay sane, lol...and I think people who do go out and hurt others are likely to do it whether they play, watch, draw or write violent things, or not.

Oh no, she's ill? Yeah I think it would be best not to let any other animals get sick. That would be worse than her having to be alone. That's so sad though, I'm sorry you've had to go through so much sadness with your pets.

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YamiSelina In reply to Robo-Shark [2013-06-13 19:01:06 +0000 UTC]

It's a curse D:

Yep, I think so too. Plus these things are usually not very creative. I like my own ideas (e.g. peel someone's skin with a potato peeler) much better Though I haven't done that and since I don't think the law will change I won't do it at all >.>

Thank you and yeah, it's kind of bad luck with bunnies... >.>
Though I hope my dogs will stay alive much more longer, they can't just die >.<
(F*ck you, cancer >.<)

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