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yuskeya β€” Caught Mid-Sentence
Published: 2005-11-28 02:59:42 +0000 UTC; Views: 165; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 2
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Description and then it was like
this fine long flash
that erupted
from
between my lungs
(legs)
it was my proverbial heart
running it’s cup along the bars of all social implications
that could possibly keep it from beating
at the same tempo as yours
please, need me
more
than i need you
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[ TEXT ]


yuskeya - in His arms
Comments: 9

sips [2005-12-14 10:13:55 +0000 UTC]

I like the rithum of your heart, you've got great tempo......

πŸ‘: 0 ⏩: 0

fragilemacabre [2005-11-28 03:03:54 +0000 UTC]

Don't you dare listen to ~Xioswar , who doesn't even know how to spell RHYTHM. It's not that hard, argh.


Anyway, this is awesome freeform poetry.


Except, it should be "its" without an apostrophe.

Favourite, I say.

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Xioswar [2005-11-28 03:01:13 +0000 UTC]

Look up the term Rythem, i only learn about this a short while ago, could be very very useful.

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yuskeya In reply to Xioswar [2005-11-28 03:27:26 +0000 UTC]

thanks for the tip.
i've not utilized the conventional rhythm that you are likely trained to seek in your small definition of poetry. it's a bit harder to do, but rhythm can be created with meaning rather than creating meaning with rhythm.

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Xioswar In reply to yuskeya [2005-11-28 03:30:14 +0000 UTC]

Well, i don't know the first thing about poetry, but i think rhythm is extremely important in all forms of poetry, it make it flow better, even if it's choppy and stuttery it still give an effect, but it has to have a pattern or else it's useless.

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yuskeya In reply to Xioswar [2005-11-28 03:38:57 +0000 UTC]

then you are quite correct!
(you don't know a thing about poetry)

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Xioswar In reply to yuskeya [2005-11-28 03:41:41 +0000 UTC]

I ain't gona whine about it. Have fun,

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fragilemacabre In reply to Xioswar [2005-11-28 03:05:26 +0000 UTC]

Perhaps you should learn how to spell the term before asking people to look it up, hmm?

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Xioswar In reply to fragilemacabre [2005-11-28 03:06:51 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, i realised that just after i hit the submit button, my bad.

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