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arafel — Stamp: Aspie not Assy
Published: 2008-09-05 05:42:20 +0000 UTC; Views: 9651; Favourites: 309; Downloads: 49
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I have aspergers syndrome. I think everyone knows this? o3o
But I've grown tired of people I've seen elsewhere on forums, flaming like a retard, then anytime something goes wrong "Oh I've got aspergers I don't know any better!"
Bullshit. XD
Okay... aspergers are blunt, make mistakes, but its not like I can't learn OH MAYBE I SHOULDN'T TELL THAT PERSON THEIR ART WAS SHIT... MAYBE... I SHOULD SAY THIS IN A NICE WAY?
I make lots of mistakes where I look bad.. but I apologize for them, I take responsibility, because in the end... even if I didn't know better, its still my fault on how I behave. If I don't know a stove is hot, and I shove someones face on it and they get burnt... well I didn't know any better just doesn't seem to cut it now does it? xD
AS isn't an excuse, its an understanding... When I was diagnosed I was so relieved to have a focus point on what I could do to communicate with people, instead of eye contact I stare at peoples lips... it lets them know they have my attention, even though they have it when I'm staring off into space, I can accept it makes them feel better. XD Its cool... if I tell people, its only so they can spot me doing something and let me know nicely so I can work on it, not so I can insult them and go OH WELL YOU KNOW.
This also works in a dual nature sort of way...
Just because I say something blunt doesn't always mean I'm being an asshole... if you ask if that dress makes you look fat, and I say yes... I'm telling you because YOU asked ME. I'm not being a dick, you asked, you get an honest answer. XD
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Comments: 183
Asperger's people are blunt are tend to be harsh, but people these are just so unused to hearing the cold hard truth in these generations.
I have Asperger's too btw.
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yeah its a general blunt thing... but... harsh, not so much, but I see that as more of a... intended action. AS minds its just like "Oh! I'm being honest, cause you wanna know right? :>" and then its like "D:< no! i did not want to know!" but when I run into people legitimately insulting others, not just "being honest" but flaming and then covering themselves like "Oh I have AS!" it bugs me =3= They probably don't really have it either, since its online... *sigh*
but yeah, people don't know how to take the truth either... xD "yes that dress makes you look fat, but that doesn't mean I don't like you... don't you have another dress that makes you look skinny? Isn't that why you asked me?"
*highfive for AS!*
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I have a thing of similar too and prosopoagnosia.
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Ah, yes, prosopoagnosia is common among AS. Its actually how I got on the track to a diagnosis.
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Here here! 
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Thank you!
Check out "Wrongplanet.net" if you want some nice aspie community places. c:
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*Also waves hand* I have AS too. Discovered I had it when I was in freshmen year of high school (I haven't been officially diagnosed, but I did research and "connected the dots", so to speak).
I too am guilty of being too honest, and I have a habit of always correcting people, and saying my 2 cents.
I've gotten better at making eye contact with people, but if it's strangers, I still don't make eye contact because I get too nervous to do so. I make eye contact with my boyfriend all the time though.
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"I haven't been officially diagnosed, but I did research and "connected the dots", so to speak"
Then don't say you have it. There's a lot of people who have symptoms of social awkwardness without having Aspergers Syndrome.
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What you say about social awkwardness and Asperger's Syndrome is definitely true - I know a few people who were shy and awkward, and who blossomed and became perfectly normal in college.
However, it's INCREDIBLY hard to get a diagnosis, especially over a certain age, especially for girls, especially if they've learned how to hide their symptoms well.
Take me for instance. Yes, I do have all the socially awkward stuff going on (painfully shy, monotone/formal way of speaking, can't start/keep up a conversation unless i'm monologuing about my special interest, have trouble following conversations). But I also have sensory issues: I'm overly sensitive to sound (when I was really little, even just the sound of someone sneezing would frighten me to tears) and touch (I hate massages and I used to hate hugs). I also do get very obsessive about things.
And yes, I mainly got this from reading the internet and "connecting the dots" (although a few specialists told my parents I might be on the spectrum when I was younger, and they treated me as such). So it IS possible to do. (And yes, I have wondered a few times "do I really have it?", and then something would happen to convince me that my suspicions were correct.)
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I only found out about it... 2 years ago, diagnoised right before graduating highschool. xD I actually skipped highschool so... I totally forget how to be like "Oh yeah such and such year..." But yeah... I developed an anxiety issue which lead to psychologists... which then lead to my one being like "Hey! I think I read about something like that..." and boom~ Got diagnosis... Which is really a blessing (If you can, get it officially done just because that's the only way you'll get college credit for it)
I got a lot better at a lot of things... Like tone of voice was a big one, all that time I thought I was changing my tone... I wasn't. xD I still correct people... but.. ah one thing, I don't interrupt people anymore to do so. Or to fill them in on information in the middle of their sentence... again, something I had no idea I was doing.
Eye contact... yeah its still really hard for me... Like.. I get really nervous, and the harder I try, the worse it gets, until I start fidgeting. I found if you look at the mouth it really helps! X3 But even people I know I still get antsy. How'd you get better at that? Just practice?
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I won't need to worry about that yet since I cannot get into college yet. Don't have the money.
My tone of voice is still hard for me, but at least I have gotten better at it, though my boyfriend helps by letting me know if I need to lower my tone since I don't usually notice it.
I did kinda practice yes by teaching myself to relax and make eye contact, though I didn't force myself though. I guess the real reason I got better is by talking with adults. (I never was comfortable talking with people my age since I couldn't really relate to them. Too mature for them.).
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Yeah... though its good to go ahead and get it because at a certain age it becomes "difficult" to diagnose. Of course the catch is that somehow... a diagnosis can become "old." I've heard complaints about that at my disability center. xD;;
Something I did for the tone of voice, was I recorded myself on the computer... the first time I did it was because I didn't believe anyone when they told me it was flat. xD But when I played it back I heard it for myself, and I was able to try and adjust based on that.
I'll probably try that... focusing on relaxing rather than pressuring myself to do it. <3 Thanks~
I have the same problem... at family reunions I'm with my aunts and uncles rather than my cousins. XD just because... Ugh. They're so immature sometimes, I have trouble standing it. Omg shoes and boys and clique drama... I'm like "Wow I so don't give a crap... D:"
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What age does it become difficult to diagnose?
I don't have a microphone for the computer, though I might borrow one from either my step dad or my boyfriend. I won't like it though as whenever I get on camera or record my voice, I always sound horrible. Not because of the tone, but because of my voice. X_X
I have trouble standing that too. Especially when they talk about using their boyfriend to buy s*&^ for them, and it always pisses me off. They don't deserve relationships at all. >_<
I do hang out with my cousins at holiday dinners (x-mas, thanksgiving, easter). I either play on the Wii with them or watch tv with them, though recently I stopped talking and hanging out with one of my cousins, who was an complete @$$*&^ to me and my boyfriend. Sad part is that he wasn't an @$$*%# before his brother committed suicide.
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after 18 its supposedly "hard" and I think the big cut off is after like.. 21-25... basically "adults" are harder to diagnose, because diagnosis uses a lot of records from childhood right now, and so the parents give records.
I hate my voice too.. xD but I think thats common for everyone? Everyone someone hears themselves its always "Do I really sound like that? D:"
and ugh.. my family can be really bad, not to completely stereotype but they're all in the deep south... the family with like 5 girls is the worst, they're all pregnant, and barefoot... as that phrase goes. Its pretty much true. D: And their conversations just unbearable. The others arn't so bad... Though I got mad at my cousins for ditching Niki, our other cousin... I was like "Screw you" and took her with me. >__> Niki is mentally challenged... so... apparently that meant they could tell her she could come with them then leave. Ugh I was so mad. I made sure to give them shit for it though. xD
Yeah I don't think I've paid her much attention since then... not as bad as being a straight out @$$ though~ that does suck D:
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I screwed then as I'll turn 20 in December.
I feel sorry for Niki. So mean of them to ditch her just because of her disability. I'm lucky to not have any family that lives down south (or at least not that I'm aware of.)
He went to Europe somewhere I believe, so I don't have to deal with him -- though if he is there, I'll give him the silent treatment and ignore him.
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I was diagnosed with Asperger's at 23, so it's still possible that you could be diagnosed. In my case, I did bring my mother along for a few sessions to provide background information and childhood records.
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True. I'll have to do that then.
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*waves hands frantically* I has it 
Seriously though, people on the internet are dumb and stupid...
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*highfive~* |D oh yes.
Actually I really love certain aspects of it... like... I don't give a shit about trends? xD thats always fun. "Who the hell cares D8""... AH! D: but but.. like... omg?""...?"
Yeah... xD i think majority of them don't actually have it, like flamers just using it... :<
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I have to admit, I once made the same mistake like you mentioned above and I deeply regret ever doing that...
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*pets* but mistakes are mistakes right~? If you know its a mistake you can work to fix it/keep it from happening again <3
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I was diagnosed as being an Aspie around... *thinks* Four years ago. |D
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I always thought that Asperger's Syndrome had symptoms more like you just didn't enjoy spending time with your peers, prefer to read books rather than play with dolls, that sort of thing. I didn't realize that it could also encompass overly blunt remarks
I love the button though, I really dislike when people mislead others' understanding of syndromes like this by using it as an excuse for bad behavior.
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It can honestly mean you're just socially inept. Like.. you don't always understand social type things, don't know what to say at the right time, don't get all the subtle social cues and so on. o-o It's hard to explain.. xD But I am so totally socially inept. >> I'll admit it!
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I played with dolls as much as I read books growing up... but the big thing was I didn't care what my peers thought. XD The prevailing theory right now is that AS individuals think with the logic center of the brain... ie the part used for math equations and so on, instead of the frontal lobes which is what everyone else uses for problem solving and general conversation. So while everyone else is thinking in an abstract form of communication... AS is thinking in a rigid logical pattern *nodnod* the result... can appear blunt, uninterested, and rude. XD
and thankyou~
it bugs me too... :< I tell people I have AS and they're like "Oh... you're so nice though " XD its kinda sad.
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*nods* that makes sense, I honestly haven't looked into it deeply, but whenever I see an article about AS I read it, since I find it strangely close to home, and very interesting. I really don't see how it is a "disorder" that you think more logically than most "normal" people, I think that'd be a good thing more than anything xD But I was not raised with the average view of human interactions
:-/ that's really really tacky of people to say, like wow, really un-politically correct xD
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Theres not a whole lot out on it right now, but I think its interesting. <3
The disorder comes in with the inability to function in a normal situation x: its just a different frame of thinking, but since the whole worlds set on this one way, it causes problems in all sorts of areas. Peer relationships, development, work, etcetc. Also some mechanical problems with it... I can't keep eye contact, so I'm always looking off to the side when I speak. Or used to.. I can't listen and write at the same time... (note taking is super hard) and also falls on the autism "spectrum" so you can be high functioning AS, to low functioning... Develop other classic autistic traits like... tics, finger flapping(where you constantly fidget), if I get too anxious I usually end up doing the hand waving thing... it makes me feel comfortable. xD And... sensitive senses~ Like to smells... and texture is a big one. *blahblahblah* Sorry I end up storing information on things and then babbling them at people. xD
and what do you mean not raised with the average view~? o3o just your parents thought different or hm?
Yeah... but its not their fault. xD Dicks posting and flaming all OH BUT ASPERGERS give them a bad impression :< Oh well, I'll fix it one person at a time |D *posepose*
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*nods* I have to admit my first exposure was when it was discussed on House MD *so obsessed* and then it just started popping up in articles and such all over, so I kept reading xD But yeah, it isn't really that well-documented, but now with the autism spectrum being able to cover any child that misbehaves, it's going to get even more muddled....
Feel free to babble! I babble too, and I prefer to get information straight from the horse's mouth, since I think you'd know better what it's like than any doctor, no matter how much they've studied AS.
Oh, hmmm, how to describe... If you've ever read a novel by Robert Heinlein, then that is a good example, but if you haven't, then you should, he was amazing (he died a while back). I'm an only child and my parents are much more my friends than parents. They always spoke to me as an equal whenever possible, and took promises to me as seriously as to any other adult. They've always considered my privacy as important as any other person's, and always trusted my word over teachers' or principals'. My mum was a philosophy major as well, so I was learning about Kant before I knew that it was odd. They also never believed in the sheltering children from reality, so nudity, sex, etc weren't forbidden topics or anything. I just grew up in a much more open and frank environment were authority was to be earned, not granted, so I have a tendency to prefer bluntness over the word games that so many people play because they an uncomfortable with some topic.... And see, now I'm babbling!
Well I think you're doing a great job fixing the misconceptions so far 
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i got it too!& I don't care, so ther people shouldn't!..aucually i was diagnosed within the spectrum, but it's still acpergers. nice stamp!
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*highfive!* yeah the whole spectrum thing makes it hard to understand sometimes... xD I'm supposedly high functioning, but I wasn't before I got diagnosed.
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i'm not 'officially' diagnosed as of yet, but that's what i kno....that & i have math learning disorder. *returns high five*
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haha thats so true, my brother has asperges syndrome as well, he wont admit it but he can be like that too himself. nice stamp
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