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ARTnoob — I can't help these scars...
Published: 2007-01-15 17:00:43 +0000 UTC; Views: 76; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 0
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Description
These kisses from these razorsAre from cheap one quarter shavers
And as the blood runs down my arm
I see the true harm
I see your face
And the disgrace
And I can't place
My finger on distaste
These wounds will leave scars
And those scars will cover these arms
As I am disgusted, mistrusted,
Hated, and evaded
I can't do anything
But try and cover them
With these wristbands and sleeves
So that no one can quite ever see
So just touch them lightly
And know that with me
The only thing I ever felt
Was the thought that my heart could melt
So see these marks
And hate the wild one who harks
For they have caused
All of my insecuritable flaws
And just remember
My ever sweet dear
That with this heart carved on my arm
I never meant you any harm
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Comments: 9
Though I think the rhyming makes this piece too sing-songy, and therefore unsuitable for the subject, I still see a very clear picture of your experiences and emotions with this issue. Thank you for being brave enough to put this piece up here for others to read.
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Thank you much for the critique.
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=] i really really like this. it has alot of emotion in it
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generally i dont read the literature, but this caught my attention.
wel expressed, could kind of see it, maybe just a little too "rhymey" but hey, thats just me.
great job though!
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I agree too much rhyming, but it was mainly to establish a definate flow... cuz some of my writing has no meter to it, so yeah.
Thank you though!
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i really like your writing
i duno if your going through self harm or not
but if you need to talk
im here
:]
been through the same kind of stuff
and wrote some to
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Everything is GREAT,especially this part
So see these marks
And hate the wild one who harks
For they have caused
All of my insecuritable flaws
And just remember
My ever sweet dear
That with this heart carved on my arm
I never meant you any harm
:ClapClap:
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