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brokenfragilethings — little moon boots
Published: 2013-04-22 22:40:30 +0000 UTC; Views: 781; Favourites: 29; Downloads: 5
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Description she was an asteroid, a falling star
made of luminosity and
moondust--
of microscopic particles that
filled up galaxies.

she spoke the language
of the comets, in
riddles and whispers of effulgence,
lost between pages of nebulae.

she wandered in her
little moon boots,
delicately tracing the outlines
of constellations.

[Ursa Major, Cassiopeia, Lupus, Orion, Pegasus...]
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Comments: 23

pansydiv [2017-03-05 11:12:41 +0000 UTC]

new favourite thing !!!!!! 

i think buttdial  will love it too 

👍: 0 ⏩: 2

brokenfragilethings In reply to pansydiv [2017-05-04 02:55:51 +0000 UTC]

i'm glad you both enjoyed it!

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pansydiv In reply to brokenfragilethings [2017-05-08 09:31:45 +0000 UTC]

of course

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buttdial In reply to pansydiv [2017-03-09 03:43:41 +0000 UTC]

you are CORRECT !!!!

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pansydiv In reply to buttdial [2017-03-09 07:52:11 +0000 UTC]

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AyeAye12 [2013-09-18 21:05:36 +0000 UTC]

POSITIVE: Awesome, lovely stuff in here language of the comets" and "pages of nebulae". Also, I really liked how you used the text size to great effect in the last line, really clever.

NEGATIVE: A lot of the really original great stuff is centered in the second stanza. Don't get me wrong, the poem is beautiful in all the stanzas, but if you reached out with more "fresh imagery" to the other stanzas it might make it nicer. Of course, that might ruin the whole poem in general so it might be a good idea to keep it the same, I dunno.

All in all though, great stuff :3

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brokenfragilethings In reply to AyeAye12 [2013-09-25 02:04:16 +0000 UTC]

Oh, thank you so much! I'm really glad you ended up enjoying it.


Haha, that happens to me a lot! I seem to put a lot of things in a certain stanza or two, and yeah. Sort of like a focal point, is how I see it, but I'm definitely working to equally distribute the way things can strike a heartstring throughout my whole piece.

Thank you kindly for the advice! I will definitely keep it in mind, and try to utilize it. It means so much!

Thanks, doll. <3

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ghearradh [2013-07-04 10:31:23 +0000 UTC]

wonderfully beautiful piece.
so, so lovely.

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brokenfragilethings In reply to ghearradh [2013-07-04 19:42:15 +0000 UTC]

Oh, wow!I honestly appreciate it C:

Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it <3

And thank you for the lovely words!

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Welanga [2013-05-31 01:35:52 +0000 UTC]

Fantastic poem, eerily beautiful

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brokenfragilethings In reply to Welanga [2013-06-06 06:08:26 +0000 UTC]

Thank you kindly. (:

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PoetsHand [2013-05-03 01:45:18 +0000 UTC]

Amazing!

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brokenfragilethings In reply to PoetsHand [2013-05-05 06:07:15 +0000 UTC]

Thank you. <3

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imaginative-lioness [2013-04-30 06:39:22 +0000 UTC]

Congratulations, this piece has been chosen for this week's 'Literature Spotlight' over at #OfSweetSerendipity

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brokenfragilethings In reply to imaginative-lioness [2013-04-30 14:13:40 +0000 UTC]

Oh, wow! O': I'm so honored. Thank you so much!! <3

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DreamingMind-set [2013-04-23 00:22:27 +0000 UTC]

Beautiful piece.

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brokenfragilethings In reply to DreamingMind-set [2013-04-23 01:08:43 +0000 UTC]

Thank you kindly! I appreciate it c:

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DreamingMind-set In reply to brokenfragilethings [2013-04-23 05:15:14 +0000 UTC]

No problem.

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DeviantCameraman [2013-04-22 23:40:20 +0000 UTC]

"Effulgence" (Yay I learnt a new word!)


I don't have much to say that might be of any real use to you,
but I think this is as cute, sweet and lovely as ever.
I really loved reading this.

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brokenfragilethings In reply to DeviantCameraman [2013-04-23 01:08:35 +0000 UTC]

Aw man, Awesome! Glad I could give a mini vocab lesson, that makes me happy. XD

Aw, Thank you so much! This was such a cute comment. I appreciate it greatly! x

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littlemoonboots [2013-04-22 23:18:54 +0000 UTC]

you're lovely aah
this is beautiful, why would you say this isn't good? the imagery is quite nice, and i went aaaah when you mentioned moonboots (i'd really like a pair) i really love the entire thing, the second to last stanza has to be my favorite by just the teeniest of margin. thank you!

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brokenfragilethings In reply to littlemoonboots [2013-04-23 01:08:05 +0000 UTC]

SSSHHHH NO YOU'RE LOVELY OKAY C':
I'm really glad you liked it!
I latched onto your deviantart name and yep,
wanted to write this c':

I'm really glad you do love it omg that makes me really happy.

THANK YOU! <3

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littlemoonboots In reply to brokenfragilethings [2013-04-23 01:17:50 +0000 UTC]

of course i love it. <3 you're welcome but thank you for writing it! aw.

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