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Sit down gather 'roun we're gonna dive into r/kidsaredumb my style!

One of the things about growing up in Vancouver Canada, is that there are many many rainy days, if you lived in a house called a Vancouver special, you didn't get much of yard for playing in, and the back was a driveway. That meant for me, I never got much outside time as a child, and I would have to channel all my energy into doing indoor things most of the time. What kind of indoor things you ask? Oh you know the usual.... running down the hallway from my parents bedroom and body slamming the sofa. This is something I did quite often to our poor old couch (which is no longer with us... not because of kept tackling it... well maybe partially) which I'm amazed never tipped on its back, or hit the window behind it. Then again I was doing this when I was around 4-6 years old and I was a smaller (and lighter) than usual for my age so it wasn't much when I did that. I remember finding being able to ram into the couch hard enough to make it tip back before righting itself hilarious though. This is what I had to entertain myself with when I got hyper because I couldn't really play outside unless I had supervision, which my parents did not have the time, or want to do. I also recall my older sister encouraging me to do it because it was funny for her too. I can just imagine doing that now, and ending up going through the window.... yeah that wouldn't be as funny..l unless we film and submit it to FailArmy.

When I first started doing Chinese school around that same time my classes were only goong throug the basic, counting, pronounciation of vowels and saying things like "Hi my name is...." "Hi I am...." etc.
Around this time I wasnot a big fanof having to learn chinese and go to chinese school, so I found ways to humor myself while doing it. On two seperate occasions I obsessed over different really dumb jokes I made. The first was when we were learning how to introduce ourselves informally by saying "I am (name)" which is "我是 (名字)" which is pronounced as "Wo shi (ming zi)" No my chinese name is not ming zi. Ming zi is the word for first name. (Not putting out my chinese name for privacy reasons) So anyway I noticed so wo shi (my chinese name) sounded like washing or wash the (my chinese name) and I thought and to my 5 year old brain that was the pinnacle of comedy. Well it wasn't that funny to me until one morning I began reciting "wash the (my chinese name)" over and over at my dad while while eating breakfast, brushing my teeth, and getting ready for (regular public) school. I don't remember what his reaction was to it, but I'm pretty sure he was unhappy about me doing that, but he never said anythibg. He just told me to "stop fooling around, hurry up, you'll be late for school" which is something I had t hear him say every morning. My mom and sister found it weird, confusing and eventuall hilarious hearing me laugh uncontrollably at me reciting the same "wash the (my chinese name)" later that same day. Keep in mind I like to picture things as well, so imagining some weird way of being washed probably contributed to the hilarity of this for me. I probably imagined being washed like a car or a pet and found that hilarious.....
(My sister: "He said wash the (my chinese name) funniest sh- I've ever seen!")

Alright I'm pretty sure the lot of you are familiar with that Sesame Street meme of Kermit trying to recite the ABCs with a little girl who kept randomly saying "Cookie Monster" while he breaks the fourth wall making weird faces, sometimes being edited as war flashback. Alright so around the same time the other joke happened, I was brushing my teeth before heading to school and my dad decided to quiz me on my ability to count in mandarin. I always hated it when he did this so to spite him I started normally like "一二三四 (yi er san si)" and then thought of the most random first word to come to mind and say it inplace of the chinese word for 5. That word was .... "Goat"....... 5 or 6 year old me stood there brushing my teeth, and in all seriousness said "Yi er san shi... GOAT!".... Another pinnacle of comedy award for kid me eh? Again my dad was not very impressed with me doing that and just gave up trying to quiz me that morning. I don't know what made that especially so funny. Maybe it was because of how I just pulled the word "goat" of all things, the fact I thought farm animals like goats, sheep, ram, etc funny to begin with, or the fact it worked on gettng my dad to let me brush my teeth in peace. Again when I showed my mom and sister my new found joke, they thought it was weird, confusing, but in the end hilarious.
(My sister: "Haha he said "goat" instead of five.... f- hilarious")

This next one's not so much weird, but more funnier for me personally to look back on sooo.. Like the majority of little kids, I hated going to bed, and would stay up hours either day dreaming things to myself, or playing "don't get caught" with my mom, whi was always very unimpressed with it. The spot my mom would sit on the couch (yes the one I used to tackle) would depend on what I did. If she sat on the side closer to the TV she would not see me as easily, because there's be a wall corner blocking her view to the hallway where I'd be coming from, and her face would be more focused on the TV. This would let me sneak up and hide behind the recliner across from the couch and watch whatever she was watching, or just do whatever behind there. If she sat on the end of the couch farther from the TV then I wouldn't be able to sneak out behind the recliner since she would have a perfect view of the hallway if she turned her head. What I'd do instead is cling onto the door frame monkey style and and watch her to se if she notices me. If she didn't then I'd slowly slide down then dart into the room across from mine, where I could still watch the TV. Most of the time she would catch me in both scenarios. The first few times it would be playful reminding/nagging but I would keep going until she had to yell at me to go to bed. Now if you're wondering whether or not she could hear my opening and closing the door, the answer is... no. I always slept with my door open as a kid. If someone closed it I'd open it again. I actually have a vague memory of her coming in my room and saying "You keep the door closed, you keep the door closed" and snutting it but not fully enogh for it to click shut, so I was able to silently pull the door back open whispering "You keep the door open, you keep the door open" and leaving it at that. Also there was a time where she went out the back door from the kitchen one night to take out the trash, and I quickly ran to that back door for, whatever reason to watch her go down the back steps with the trash bags. I remember thinking to myself how funny it was that I was right there and she didn't know. What I didn't know was at the time that when she was coming back she could see me standing there, and because it was dark, I couldn't see her until the last minute, and when I did I had that "Oh sh-" moment and booked it abck to my room, just as my mom got in and yelled at me from the kitchen. This all happened around the same time as the events in the other two paragraphs so around 4-6 years old?

Lots of the weird stuff I believed as a kid were some of the things many kids believed. That mom and dad knew the answers to everything, that dogs were boys and cats were girls (Where did that idea even come from? I feel like some cartoons I've watched reinforce this weird belief for kids)
But then there were weird things I believed for a bit too long and for no reason. Up until like my preteens-early teens I believed the events of King Kong were real events that happened. This all started from seeing Kong Kong related souveneirs when I visited New York City and the Empire State building, and no one ever corrected me when I talked about King Kong as if it was something that actually happened, so that's sorta why I believed that.

Also for a strangely long time I didn't believe the planets revolved around the sun in the same direction. I thought they all revolved in different directions. Not sure why or how that came to be, seeing as I was a space nerd and had so many space books full of diagramas and all of that that explained how the planets revoled around the sun. *shrug* I knew that they went in order from closest to farthest starting from Mercury to Pluto (shush I grew up learning that Pluto was a planet and I will always recognize it as one... Vive le Pluto Libre!.... oh wait... I think that contradicts what I just said..)

During my Titanic phase in grades 2 and 3 I was really into the James Cameron movie Titanic. No my mom did not let me watch the first half. She only let me watching the part fromthe ice berg to the sinking part. When found a book on how they made the movie, I couldn't read the small writing but from the pictures it looked like they had built an entire accurately sized replica, boat. So then at 7-10 years old I thought they had built an entire functioning scaled accurate scale to size, design etc replica of the Titanic, filled it up it with all the actors sailed it out somewhere and sank it to make the movie. I only realized they did ot do that when I saw the DVD version's behind the scenes clips and the actual replicas and props they used. I also thought something similar when I watched that Tom Cruise version of War of the Worlds and didn't believe my mom when she told me they did not build robots, and did not destroy real cars.

Since I am getting tired, I'mma have to end it right there. Will I make a part 2?

I don't know depends if I can remember enough to make another part.

lol

Peace

Description
Sit down gather 'roun we're gonna dive into r/kidsaredumb my style!

One of the things about growing up in Vancouver Canada, is that there are many many rainy days, if you lived in a house called a Vancouver special, you didn't get much of yard for playing in, and the back was a driveway. That meant for me, I never got much outside time as a child, and I would have to channel all my energy into doing indoor things most of the time. What kind of indoor things you ask? Oh you know the usual.... running down the hallway from my parents bedroom and body slamming the sofa. This is something I did quite often to our poor old couch (which is no longer with us... not because of kept tackling it... well maybe partially) which I'm amazed never tipped on its back, or hit the window behind it. Then again I was doing this when I was around 4-6 years old and I was a smaller (and lighter) than usual for my age so it wasn't much when I did that. I remember finding being able to ram into the couch hard enough to make it tip back before righting itself hilarious though. This is what I had to entertain myself with when I got hyper because I couldn't really play outside unless I had supervision, which my parents did not have the time, or want to do. I also recall my older sister encouraging me to do it because it was funny for her too. I can just imagine doing that now, and ending up going through the window.... yeah that wouldn't be as funny..l unless we film and submit it to FailArmy.

When I first started doing Chinese school around that same time my classes were only goong throug the basic, counting, pronounciation of vowels and saying things like "Hi my name is...." "Hi I am...." etc.
Around this time I wasnot a big fanof having to learn chinese and go to chinese school, so I found ways to humor myself while doing it. On two seperate occasions I obsessed over different really dumb jokes I made. The first was when we were learning how to introduce ourselves informally by saying "I am (name)" which is "我是 (名字)" which is pronounced as "Wo shi (ming zi)" No my chinese name is not ming zi. Ming zi is the word for first name. (Not putting out my chinese name for privacy reasons) So anyway I noticed so wo shi (my chinese name) sounded like washing or wash the (my chinese name) and I thought and to my 5 year old brain that was the pinnacle of comedy. Well it wasn't that funny to me until one morning I began reciting "wash the (my chinese name)" over and over at my dad while while eating breakfast, brushing my teeth, and getting ready for (regular public) school. I don't remember what his reaction was to it, but I'm pretty sure he was unhappy about me doing that, but he never said anythibg. He just told me to "stop fooling around, hurry up, you'll be late for school" which is something I had t hear him say every morning. My mom and sister found it weird, confusing and eventuall hilarious hearing me laugh uncontrollably at me reciting the same "wash the (my chinese name)" later that same day. Keep in mind I like to picture things as well, so imagining some weird way of being washed probably contributed to the hilarity of this for me. I probably imagined being washed like a car or a pet and found that hilarious.....
(My sister: "He said wash the (my chinese name) funniest sh- I've ever seen!")

Alright I'm pretty sure the lot of you are familiar with that Sesame Street meme of Kermit trying to recite the ABCs with a little girl who kept randomly saying "Cookie Monster" while he breaks the fourth wall making weird faces, sometimes being edited as war flashback. Alright so around the same time the other joke happened, I was brushing my teeth before heading to school and my dad decided to quiz me on my ability to count in mandarin. I always hated it when he did this so to spite him I started normally like "一二三四 (yi er san si)" and then thought of the most random first word to come to mind and say it inplace of the chinese word for 5. That word was .... "Goat"....... 5 or 6 year old me stood there brushing my teeth, and in all seriousness said "Yi er san shi... GOAT!".... Another pinnacle of comedy award for kid me eh? Again my dad was not very impressed with me doing that and just gave up trying to quiz me that morning. I don't know what made that especially so funny. Maybe it was because of how I just pulled the word "goat" of all things, the fact I thought farm animals like goats, sheep, ram, etc funny to begin with, or the fact it worked on gettng my dad to let me brush my teeth in peace. Again when I showed my mom and sister my new found joke, they thought it was weird, confusing, but in the end hilarious.
(My sister: "Haha he said "goat" instead of five.... f- hilarious")

This next one's not so much weird, but more funnier for me personally to look back on sooo.. Like the majority of little kids, I hated going to bed, and would stay up hours either day dreaming things to myself, or playing "don't get caught" with my mom, whi was always very unimpressed with it. The spot my mom would sit on the couch (yes the one I used to tackle) would depend on what I did. If she sat on the side closer to the TV she would not see me as easily, because there's be a wall corner blocking her view to the hallway where I'd be coming from, and her face would be more focused on the TV. This would let me sneak up and hide behind the recliner across from the couch and watch whatever she was watching, or just do whatever behind there. If she sat on the end of the couch farther from the TV then I wouldn't be able to sneak out behind the recliner since she would have a perfect view of the hallway if she turned her head. What I'd do instead is cling onto the door frame monkey style and and watch her to se if she notices me. If she didn't then I'd slowly slide down then dart into the room across from mine, where I could still watch the TV. Most of the time she would catch me in both scenarios. The first few times it would be playful reminding/nagging but I would keep going until she had to yell at me to go to bed. Now if you're wondering whether or not she could hear my opening and closing the door, the answer is... no. I always slept with my door open as a kid. If someone closed it I'd open it again. I actually have a vague memory of her coming in my room and saying "You keep the door closed, you keep the door closed" and snutting it but not fully enogh for it to click shut, so I was able to silently pull the door back open whispering "You keep the door open, you keep the door open" and leaving it at that. Also there was a time where she went out the back door from the kitchen one night to take out the trash, and I quickly ran to that back door for, whatever reason to watch her go down the back steps with the trash bags. I remember thinking to myself how funny it was that I was right there and she didn't know. What I didn't know was at the time that when she was coming back she could see me standing there, and because it was dark, I couldn't see her until the last minute, and when I did I had that "Oh sh-" moment and booked it abck to my room, just as my mom got in and yelled at me from the kitchen. This all happened around the same time as the events in the other two paragraphs so around 4-6 years old?

Lots of the weird stuff I believed as a kid were some of the things many kids believed. That mom and dad knew the answers to everything, that dogs were boys and cats were girls (Where did that idea even come from? I feel like some cartoons I've watched reinforce this weird belief for kids)
But then there were weird things I believed for a bit too long and for no reason. Up until like my preteens-early teens I believed the events of King Kong were real events that happened. This all started from seeing Kong Kong related souveneirs when I visited New York City and the Empire State building, and no one ever corrected me when I talked about King Kong as if it was something that actually happened, so that's sorta why I believed that.

Also for a strangely long time I didn't believe the planets revolved around the sun in the same direction. I thought they all revolved in different directions. Not sure why or how that came to be, seeing as I was a space nerd and had so many space books full of diagramas and all of that that explained how the planets revoled around the sun. *shrug* I knew that they went in order from closest to farthest starting from Mercury to Pluto (shush I grew up learning that Pluto was a planet and I will always recognize it as one... Vive le Pluto Libre!.... oh wait... I think that contradicts what I just said..)

During my Titanic phase in grades 2 and 3 I was really into the James Cameron movie Titanic. No my mom did not let me watch the first half. She only let me watching the part fromthe ice berg to the sinking part. When found a book on how they made the movie, I couldn't read the small writing but from the pictures it looked like they had built an entire accurately sized replica, boat. So then at 7-10 years old I thought they had built an entire functioning scaled accurate scale to size, design etc replica of the Titanic, filled it up it with all the actors sailed it out somewhere and sank it to make the movie. I only realized they did ot do that when I saw the DVD version's behind the scenes clips and the actual replicas and props they used. I also thought something similar when I watched that Tom Cruise version of War of the Worlds and didn't believe my mom when she told me they did not build robots, and did not destroy real cars.

Since I am getting tired, I'mma have to end it right there. Will I make a part 2?

I don't know depends if I can remember enough to make another part.

lol

Peace