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ClickClickBangUKugly for a reason

Published: 2010-02-19 10:11:29 +0000 UTC; Views: 76397; Favourites: 1165; Downloads: 0
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Description THANK YOU SO MUCH for the inspiring comments and revelations and laying bare, many of them have left me speechless and several have reduced me to tears. thank you @leaf-lover for giving me a DD on probably the one photograph in my gallery i hate, but i do understand why!

for those who have asked, the quote that was given to me by my tutor which led to this picture is:
‘A photograph is both a pseudo-presence and a token of absence. Like a wood fire in a room, photographs – especially those of people, of distant landscapes and faraway cities, of the vanished past – are incitements to reverie*. The sense of the unattainable that can be evoked by photographs feeds directly into the erotic feelings of those for whom desirability is enhanced by distance. The lover’s photograph hidden in a married woman’s wallet, the poster photograph of a rock star tacked up over an adolescents bed, the campaign-button image of a politician’s face pinned on a voter’s coat, the snapshots of a cabin-driver’s children clipped to the visor – all such talismanic uses of photographs express a feeling both sentimental and implicitly magical: the are attempts to contact or lay claim to another reality.’ (Sontag, 1979:16)




EDIT-i'm seriously gobsmacked and touched by the lovely, positive, inspiring comments i'm getting on this image. i certainly wasnt expecting it. thank you so much everyone, it means an awful lot

college self portrait. no editing or post-processing, based on a susan sontag quote.

i nearly chickened out of using this for college at all, i found it very difficult as it has a lot of personal meaning and i find it difficult to post 'warts-and-all' images of myself.

explanation of the image taken from my college posting:

"the neck corset-relates to my eating disorder. i have suffered from bulimia for 15 years, and have recently started therapy for it, the corset represents the purging of food, and the restriction an eating disorder has over your life. i'm hoping that its almost past me, i'm getting there at least.

the invisible face/visible mouth again relating to the bulimia, it is amazing how your life rotates around your mouth and what you put in/take out of it when you have an ED, and i wanted to reflect that.

the taut string on my tummy relates to my body before and after children, i have never been a skinny girl but after having 2 very large children (both over 10 pounds) my body has taken a large toll (which in turn has influenced the eating disorder) and as a larger lady, its the one part of my body i feel isnt in proportion with the rest of me. the string represents the state of my tum before i had children, and how i miss it, but the purple heart is placed over my womb, because i may hate my belly, but i still love it because it gave me two beautiful children.

its a reflection on my body, on my life, mostly past (like in the quote) but also present, 'an incitement to reverie' and remembrance of what things were like before.

its a difficult picture for me, i rarely do full body self portraits but i wanted to, hopefully, do the sontag quote some justice. i dont know if thats been acheived but, even though its been hard, i sorta-kinda like the end result. i'd like it a lot more if it wasnt of me though

i'd really appreciate your feedback on what the image means to you after the explanation, and i am very open about my ED so dont be afraid to ask any questions "

please be nice, remember its an un-edited picture so no crit on that side of things thanks!
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Comments: 1379

1EvL1 In reply to ??? [2010-02-25 01:04:17 +0000 UTC]

I love this photograph. It is Super. It reminds my of my X-Girlfriend. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and you are BEAUTIFUL! I read some of the comments about lipstick and corset matching. What does it mater. Look at it for what it is a Perfect photograph. Keep up the incredible work. Oh and I love Twiglets,they are fantastic.

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canadian-weapon338 [2010-02-24 23:45:21 +0000 UTC]

i wonderful shot my dear i love it for it what it represents great work hun

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Juliabohemian [2010-02-24 22:16:45 +0000 UTC]

My only complaint would be that the lipstick and nck piece are two clashing shades of pink. It would have been cool if they'd matched.

I applaud your willingness to challenge conventional beuaty.

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Juliabohemian In reply to Juliabohemian [2010-02-24 22:18:38 +0000 UTC]

*neck

No idea why this posted twice...

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Juliabohemian [2010-02-24 22:16:42 +0000 UTC]

My only complaint would be that the lipstick and nck piece are two clashing shades of pink. It would have been cool if they'd matched.

I applaud your willingness to challenge conventional beuaty.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to Juliabohemian [2010-02-24 22:20:03 +0000 UTC]

aye not much i could do about that, the lipstick was the closest colour i had and with no editing allowed, couldnt change it in post-production

thanks love!

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Juliabohemian In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-24 22:34:46 +0000 UTC]

Ah well. Just a nitpick. But excellent work for no editing.

I am amused by the people who feel the need to come to this page and point out that you're fat. Because you were obviously unaware. Why do people think that their definition of beauty is the universal one? Oh yeah, I think it's called narcissism.

Good luck.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to Juliabohemian [2010-02-25 08:30:32 +0000 UTC]

i know, its a bit sad, its not like i came on here thinking i was gods gift or anything but, their opinions dont matter and its one HELL of an entertaining read! thank you!

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TwistedPhae In reply to ??? [2010-02-24 21:04:11 +0000 UTC]

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. This one is worth more than just a thousand. It speaks volumes...in fact, it screams. The courage to stand up, bare everything, and share it with the world is an amazing thing. Kudos to you my dear, I sure couldn't do what you have done. This is a piece of true beauty, definitely worthy of many, many collections!

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to TwistedPhae [2010-02-24 21:22:16 +0000 UTC]

thank you so very very much!

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TwistedPhae In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-26 16:51:34 +0000 UTC]

Quite welcome hun!

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Artistjeffries In reply to ??? [2010-02-24 19:30:39 +0000 UTC]

Hello ladytwiglet just sorting out the little creep omar6 who has e-mail me with his immature viewpoints on what he considers beauty, then I'll block him like I assume you have.

In my humble opinion you have great beauty and courage.

Mike

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to Artistjeffries [2010-02-24 20:03:41 +0000 UTC]

i have no real issues with him to be honest, my skin is thicker than that, it takes MUCH more than that for me to block someone. its not his fault hes a moron but thank you for your help love, its really appreciated!

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Artistjeffries In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-24 22:04:27 +0000 UTC]

It's the least I can do.

Best regards

Mike

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forbiddenmyth In reply to ??? [2010-02-24 19:12:59 +0000 UTC]

The trolls are just jealous of the fact that they can't get anyone as fantastic as you.

You are a hero to many women and girls, myself included.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to forbiddenmyth [2010-02-24 20:04:45 +0000 UTC]

aww thank you! trolls dont bother me in the slightest, i have been on dA for nearly 8 years and i've always wanted an image with a load of trolls on it, my dream has been fulfilled

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forbiddenmyth In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-24 20:08:02 +0000 UTC]

RAWR. I just think it's hilarious.

Stay lovely, lovely.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to forbiddenmyth [2010-02-24 20:17:21 +0000 UTC]

you too

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BleedLikeAGod In reply to ??? [2010-02-24 18:42:03 +0000 UTC]

Interesting image. I admire your ability to stand in front of a camera in this way.

I have found that many people are not actually critiquing the technical qualities of the image itself, so I will do that. I like the coloring and the work gone into what you are wearing. I do not like the cloth (I assume underwear/panties) you are wearing. The tan color is too close to your own skin but too different to go unnoticed, and the black on it is distracting against the pale color. Apart from that, I wish I could also see more of the image. I understand why you cropped it at the top, but I wish there was more on the sides so I could see the rest of your arms, and maybe a little more on the bottom.

I hope this critique has helped you. Congrats on the DD.

Since critique is not enabled:

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to BleedLikeAGod [2010-02-24 18:56:02 +0000 UTC]

actually, if you read the description it says that the image is completely unedited because it was part of a college assignment and part of the instructions were for it to be straight from camera, so i am well aware of the technical difficulties of the image and did state in the description (which is massively long, so its not your fault you didnt see it lol!) that i didnt want technical crit BUT having said that, i do appreciate the time you took to do it, thank you very much

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BleedLikeAGod In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-24 19:08:56 +0000 UTC]

Oh dear, I didn't see that part. I still think the part about what you were wearing, which is part of the planning process, is important to note, though.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to BleedLikeAGod [2010-02-24 20:02:20 +0000 UTC]

indeed, although the reason for that is i didnt want to be fully nude

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BleedLikeAGod In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-24 20:11:53 +0000 UTC]

PFFFT!

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to BleedLikeAGod [2010-02-24 20:17:06 +0000 UTC]

yeahyeah i know it was hard enough to do this portrait without being completely nuddy lol!

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Sweetestsarah In reply to ??? [2010-02-24 06:32:02 +0000 UTC]

You are beautiful and an inspiration.

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to Sweetestsarah [2010-02-24 14:34:49 +0000 UTC]

thank you!

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Avaapril In reply to ??? [2010-02-24 04:22:33 +0000 UTC]

what an honour it is to see such a beautiful image. I love it when artists tell the story behind the image so that we get to better understand it. Sometimes the ideas are obvious but in this case understanding what each part of your picture meant helped love it even more. You are a very brave and beautiful woman. keep it up

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norah7 In reply to ??? [2010-02-23 19:00:45 +0000 UTC]

i am really touched by this,i lost my mum to an eating disorder in november and the placing and item used in the piece for the sybolism could not have been more correct feels right to say what i have said and had said to me , you cant see what i see in you.

i used to say it to my mum alot
much love youve got more back bone than myslef <3

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to norah7 [2010-02-23 22:16:16 +0000 UTC]

oh sweetheart i'm so sorry for your loss i'm glad it spoke to you, thats a real honour

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norah7 In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-24 18:32:06 +0000 UTC]

no worries much love and kudos<3

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alpharaye In reply to ??? [2010-02-23 18:52:18 +0000 UTC]

Thank you for having the courage that many of us big girls sometimes lack for posting about such matters.

<3 You have my respect and gratitude.

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quaddie In reply to ??? [2010-02-23 17:07:31 +0000 UTC]

"ugly for a reason" Never,never that....you are beautiful for all the reasons you list.,i am just stunned by your bravery and candor...this shot really does deseve the DD you recieved .

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Eledemar In reply to ??? [2010-02-23 06:22:16 +0000 UTC]

"please be nice, remember its an un-edited picture so no crit on that side of things thanks!"

Why would you edit this image. It would then be fake. This is a beautiful image and a beautiful woman. Thank you for sharing your life experiences and adding value to mine.

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budjang In reply to ??? [2010-02-23 03:52:04 +0000 UTC]

...... genuine, free, inspiring ......

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Bobbie-Morgaes In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 22:24:20 +0000 UTC]

so honest and pure. this is beautiful.

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kassandria In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 15:58:06 +0000 UTC]

Thank you! This is a really stunning and powerful image. My friend and model saw it and sent it to me. you are just amazing. Having simular pasts and issues it is amazing to see someone so strong.

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obliviousxparanoia In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 05:59:05 +0000 UTC]

featured in my journal, [link]

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sadiek [2010-02-22 05:36:36 +0000 UTC]

You're a wonderful lady. I admire you so much *-*

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Dynneybear In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 05:00:34 +0000 UTC]

I'm your average, healthy-weighted girl with decent self esteem about my body, and I still found this photograph extremely meaningful and beautiful in every way. You're a million times prettier than me, and weight has nothing to do with it. <3

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HikoriStickz In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 04:24:04 +0000 UTC]

I applaud you for being able to do this.
Seeing you do this made me feel better about myself. I've never really like the way I looked and even though you are not entirely happy with your appearance you had the guts to post this here.

You are an inspiration to people everywhere. Especially to me. Thank you so much for doing this.

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Zantillia In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 04:15:06 +0000 UTC]

Thank You. I'm not a skinny girl either, but I could never imagine doing something so wonderful as this. I admire you so fully, you really are an amazing person. I wish you the best of luck with your therapy, it really helped me with my sever anxiety issues, and I will keep you in my thoughts, and remember that no matter what, you are always beautiful.

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Ri-Chi In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 03:30:17 +0000 UTC]

This is a stunning picture, I love the symbolism of the corset. It's amazing of you to overcome your feelings about yourself to deliver this image, and this picture delivers a great message; my sister is fighting off anorexia right now, she was brought to tears by this picture, she loved it and related to it a lot.

Thank you, so much. <3 !

And for the record, I think you look beautiful, and I don't think I could ever be this brave.

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camedeos In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 03:05:27 +0000 UTC]

Congratulations for your amazing picture and for having the guts for doing it. Everyone said it: This is truly inspiring. I'm actually very touched by this (It's kinda embarrassing to cry, huh?). I hope to achieve the same and not being afraid for who I am.

Awesome!!!

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FreakOfAChick666 In reply to ??? [2010-02-22 01:55:28 +0000 UTC]

i wish more woman could take pictures of them selves in their own flesh instead of having someone use photoshop to the max on them and turn them into another cookie cutting image of being fake.

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Yumeragi-chan In reply to ??? [2010-02-21 21:58:24 +0000 UTC]

I really liked, made me feel good about my ugly body and myself

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SlowParentsCrossing In reply to ??? [2010-02-21 21:23:59 +0000 UTC]

I want to be the first person to remind you that you're quite beautiful today.
I think you're very strong, for putting this up, and the symbolism of this is just, overpowering.

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TehSerendipity In reply to ??? [2010-02-21 21:03:34 +0000 UTC]

you know i love you and i know how brave you truely are,
you are beautiful and amazing to me.
donna ur comment reduced me to tear, i really do miss you. xxx

ps.ive never had the chance to say this ur boobs are amazing, this image is perfect it doesnt need editing.x

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ClickClickBangUK In reply to TehSerendipity [2010-02-21 21:19:37 +0000 UTC]

thank you babes, i miss you so much

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TehSerendipity In reply to ClickClickBangUK [2010-02-22 02:49:55 +0000 UTC]

:hugs: xxxx

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pwra [2010-02-21 20:55:29 +0000 UTC]

There's no one ugly because of the "shape". All shapes are pretty and I think no one should be looking on the outside because I'm pretty sure you're someone amazing and at least, the ones who decides to look beyond what's outside are the most clever ones. And... who said it was ugly? No one.

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