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DeadEndSeries — Escapism
#baseball #biscuts #books #bookstore #california #delinquent #escapism #fresno #grafiti #homelessness #karla #littleleague #oc #pipsqueak #short #steal #tea #smithstreet #deadendseries
Published: 2016-11-16 06:56:51 +0000 UTC; Views: 773; Favourites: 27; Downloads: 1
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'Lookin' out a dirty old window, down below the cars in the city go rushin' by...' --Kim Wilde, Kids in AmericaD'aw what a cutie-face.
I mean, she'll steal your wallet, your watch and probably your last pack of gum, but, she's cute.
A bit of an illustration on Karla's life before she met a certain dark-haired lady with a 68' Roadrunner.
An abandoned bookstore isn't exactly the nicest place to stay, there's rats, roaches, mold and mildew, but it's safer than the streets of Fresno. On the up-side, there's BOOKS!
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Comments: 18
Greetings from
Firstly, this is lovely. I like the girl's expression, setting, and the atmosphere. Is this part of your story? I'm wondering why her right arm has spots. Are these scars? I'm wondering if she's happy or feeling some darkness.
But as this is project comment, let us start on the constructive comments.
1) Composition: It's pretty good, but feels a bit crowded. But if that was your intention, then well done.
2) Anatomy and such: It looks pretty good.
3) Lines: Now here is where I think some changes can be made. I do like the rough feel of your art, but if you are only using lines, I want to see more care. Because all the lines have the same strength and weight, it takes away the depth and volume from the art. Stronger lines should be used for where there is more weight, closer to the viewer, etc., while softer lines should be used for things like hair, cheek, top side of thighs where there is no weight, etc. I hope that makes sense. You can also use different style of lines for body versus inanimate objects. Are you using one or two pens? You could try using thin ink pen along with a marker, pencil, or even brush pens, etc., to create more variety in lines; and thus, more character and depth in your art.
4) Details: I like how you put a lot of details in the piece, but everything looks rushed. I think this piece would look great if you could take more time and complete all the little details with care. This means patience. It's easy to say. I have a serious problem with patience, and have been told many times to take my time and slow down. One of the best advise I received was not to post my art when I finish, but sleep on it and look at it again.
I hope this is helpful. I do like your subject a lot though
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Thank you for this, Phoenix! I appreciate your time and advice. I will definitely work on my patience and try to slow down a little for some cleaner linework and such.
I was limited to one pen and a pencil for this piece because I was away, but if I wasn't in a hurry to post it and be done with it, I'm sure I could have made it better.
I appreciate your feedback. 
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Hello! I found your piece on and here´s my critic, hope it helps!
The composition is very good, I like it a lot actually. It transmits me the feeling. Also, the drawing line goes along very well with it. It´s kinda messy and doubtful, and that´s what this kind of places look like, love it. The shading is very simple, wich I like in this drawing. Everything has the feeling of the people in a hard situation. These opinions are mostly personal but hope they help anyway
Something that maybe could be improved is the way you drawn the hair. The lines are a bit similar. Leaving some parts of the hair without lines, or colouring black some parts, would make it less repetitive. Another thing is that making her left leg darker would add depth to the drawing.
Sorry for my english, Is not my mother tongue :/
I really like it, nice gallerie
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Thank you so much for your comment, Estella.
I will definitely practise my composition of hair and I agree with your note regarding shading.
Your feedback is helpful, and there's no need to apologise for your English, it is very good.
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You´re welcome, I´m glad that it was helpful!
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really well done. I would have to mention that I do not know exactly is on her arm?
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Thank you!
The little blotches? They're cigarette burns.
Her dad is kind of a dreadful human being.
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Her life gets a lot better from there on, I promise.
(Love your avatar by the way. Skullduggery Pleasant is the bomb.)
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I hope Derek Landy get's a good deal to have a series
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Me too. Did you hear there's going to be a book ten?
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.....
What....I kinda liked the ending..... What kind of enemy can they top?
Darquesse was foreshadowed since maybe even the start and referenced in book 4 if I remember correctly. What kind of villain can top someone which took 4 books building up her war. Plus the side stories, just to get to the final confrontation. I love Derek Landy's writing. I am sketchy on if another story is made... Could it really top someone as powerful and Foreshadowed in the series?
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I'm still trying to figure that out myself. All of the plot problems have been solved and there really wasn't any room left for more conflict at the end of book nine, nor was any suggested. That said, I'm always interested in anything written by Derek.
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I guess it would interesting. Oh... I think I know... The other realm, the one with malevolent and his army. That guy was more powerful if not on par with darquesse.
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True.
I guess we'll have to wait and see if you're right.
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Cheers! 
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