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Description
She thinks. She talks to herself. Not about her assignment or her contact. She long ago stopped thinking about that. It’s purely routine now. She’s half-convinced it is too late. And who will take the blame for that? Not whoever made the mistake. It will be her. That’s all right. It will mean a desk job. Or a reassignment. A dressing-down. A lot of talk about how much more is expected of her. But if so much was expected, they wouldn’t have sent her here. She knows that.

She thinks about her mother. Or about her ex. Or about the porter at the desk she slept with the first week, who sometimes still knocks on her door. She hasn’t opened. Sometimes she considers letting him in, but not seriously. Because she knows if she does it one more time, she’ll have to do it again. And again. And she can’t stand that. That kind of demand for her time.

But then again, she’s here.

Description
She thinks. She talks to herself. Not about her assignment or her contact. She long ago stopped thinking about that. It’s purely routine now. She’s half-convinced it is too late. And who will take the blame for that? Not whoever made the mistake. It will be her. That’s all right. It will mean a desk job. Or a reassignment. A dressing-down. A lot of talk about how much more is expected of her. But if so much was expected, they wouldn’t have sent her here. She knows that.

She thinks about her mother. Or about her ex. Or about the porter at the desk she slept with the first week, who sometimes still knocks on her door. She hasn’t opened. Sometimes she considers letting him in, but not seriously. Because she knows if she does it one more time, she’ll have to do it again. And again. And she can’t stand that. That kind of demand for her time.

But then again, she’s here.