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enigma-theory — Decadence
Published: 2010-02-01 09:38:28 +0000 UTC; Views: 1165; Favourites: 30; Downloads: 7
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Description
Bringing darkness upon light,Bestowing serenity into the night;
Sheets of velvet uniform an array of quiet black,
Concealing rays of dismay,
While miniature piercings form constellations
Of hope among the living.
Body parallel to the break of the horizon,
I take advantage of this exquisite silence.
While the rest of the world lies in a coma of sleep,
I brush blades of grass against my palm;
And wait for my thoughts to conjure themselves once more.
My spirit fixates;
Such an intense longing wrenches at my core,
I have become subject to an Eternal bewitchment;
To become fully enlightened
By that of a single collaboration with another,
So that my half lit soul can regain what was once lost.
My voice compels itself to echo toward the ether,
But the screams elevate to dead silence.
This yearning is lacerating my consciousness;
And maiming my heart.. It's cruel..
Banish this void that burdens me every moment i breathe!
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Comments: 25
This is impressive and written in a very elegant, enchanting manner. You've chosen all the right words to exuberate the mood you wanted to convey
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thank u, it means a lot.. and im glad u like it
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I adore the word decadence so I had to read this. I must say im not one to normally read allot of words on DA. But your words have painted a picture im my mind that no digital art could rival. Such vivid writings *
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u have no idea how much of an impact what u just said had on me.. i really dont know what to say except thank u 
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No, credit where its due. You have a genuine talent. Im so glad ive made a positive impact on you like that!
Ive added you to my DA watch ( which I dont do often ill add ) but im curious about what youl do next .
Now you have another member in this digital audience
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thank u 
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Of course its all good, thanks ! Its people like you that make DA all the cooler
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hehe i could say the same about u
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So powerful and beautiful... it makes me think of when I'm lying in my bed and just about to write a poem--how all the emotion of the moment conjure together in my head, ready to spill forth.
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thank u for that, meant a lot to me.. im glad my piece has some sort of an affect on u
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^^ It did, I really enjoyed it.
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Again, another brilliant piece.
A really interesting idea, quite different from your last pieces.
I like the idea of "blades of grass." It makes them sound sharp and painful, which is in direct contrast to what we know of them.
"Eternal bewitchment" is another line i love, it's so different and unique.
I like the last line, another powerful ending from you, however the use of the exclamation point is unnecessary in my honest opinon, since the sentance is an exclamation in itself. I feel the exclamation point is useless here.
Good piece though!
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initially i had the last line end with a full stop, but for some reason it just didnt seem as pain felt as i wanted it to be.. although the sentence is separated on its own, i feel that with the exclamation mark it felt better, made the sentence more dramatic.. i guess having it there isnt a big deal right? 
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Ah right. I see what you did there now.
I think that you could leave it in or leave it out. I doubt it'd bother many others. But i think the line will work without it too
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I like it, the language sounds just right to me -not using too many long words to sound clever, nor being plain and unvaried. My sound patterning could add a bit to it [eg alliteration, assonance; nothing too drastic] but its darn fine as it is.
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why thank u
i appreciate u taking the time to give me ur opinion, i quite like this one too actually hehe.. thanks for the encouragement
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I like it a lot 
Excellent work
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well coincidentally the first two lines ended up rhyming on their own hehe
thank u for the comment and the encouragement i really appreciate it
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