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Fenchurch-St — Hunting Atomic Kitten
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Published: 2008-09-13 16:25:51 +0000 UTC; Views: 175; Favourites: 1; Downloads: 0
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Description
Taking over the world is 'geet' fun.Characteristics to look out for:
Atomic Kitten - Since the disembowelment of Kerry Katona, other members of the girl band have since become fair game... literally. Image supplied by [link]
Helicopter - They are quick, notice the livery is similar to the VW Van.
Monkey - Monkey Butlers are the staple slave. Stupid, easy to train, easy to employ, fluffy and cute! I realised I can't draw monkeys, so I stole Monkey by
Trident and net - The perfect hunting tools. If they are good enough for catching 18th century whales then they are good enough for catching 21th century girl band members.
Nakedness - Nudism isn't a way of life, it's an ideology. Plus it saves on cleaning and you can instinctively dive into hash pools without hesitation.
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Comments: 86
Who needs bombs anyway, especially when your attacking from the above.
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exactly!
just throw spears and nets
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I've thought of an amazing idea, why don't you nag your parents to put you up for adoption and since I'm 21 I can adopt you!
Then I can fulfil my dreams of being a wicked step-mother! Once I've tagged, nurtured and house trained you we'll get along swimmingly. You can sleep at the bottom of my bed and I can stroke you after a hard at uni. I promise to feed, water and bath you. I'll even get one of those big wheels you can run around in.
So what do you say?
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that sounds fantastic!
except, why do you want to tag me?
I love being petted like a kitten as well
the big hamster wheels aswell!
except
one thing
can we get a circular bed?
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I live in Nottingham which is renowned for being dangerous, so I want to tag in case I lose you or you're kidnapped.
The circular bed sounds expensive, I could get lots of bean bags and a massive quilt.
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good enough for me!
aww that's sweet
I feel cared for.
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Mind you, you will be subjected to poverty (although I'd imagine I could claim child support & EMA) and jealous housemates.
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jealous housemates sound fun
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D
that you have this obscure and promiscuous fifteen year old girl as a pet?
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I don't think there is anyway to answer that question without making me sound like a pedofile.
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or your neighbors looking like pedophiles
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I live next to a Post Office and students, neither of whom are very sociable, so I don't think they'll care.
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My landlords might ask questions though when they come to inspect...
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I'll hide under your bed
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But that's where my cat hides!
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oh okay
I'll hide in your closet.
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But that's where I keep my ill-confident lesbians!
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I can make some...friends.
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Fine but keep it quiet, no musical chairs or pass the parcel!
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okaay.
can we play twister?
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Yes, yes you may, if there is room.
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sounds good
failing that
I'm going for kerplunk!
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Kerplunk is quite noisy though what with all the kerplunking.
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oh dear.
can we just have really quiet sex then?
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Alright but if you're going to orgasm can you muffle yourself against my clothes.
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maybe we should just make this cupboard sound-proof?
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That's an idea, or even cheaper I could just let you and the lesbians out while I'm being inspected.
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would the mind you keeping lesbians and a fifteen year old girl in your flat?
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Well I don't think they like the idea of keeping lots of pets, that and I can get arrested for polygamy and paedophilia.
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hmm...
well if you're not touching me inappropriately then it won't be pedophilia
it just depends if you can keep your hands off me for that long
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Oh but I like your stroking hair, its soft and fluffy... probably.
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haha.
Is it inappropriate to pet me like a kitten?
I would say it's VERY appropriate
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Oh so you won't mind your tummy being tickled either?
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I thought you'd never ask
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Well its not the first you normally ask is it?
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you forget.
I'm just like you.
in which case it should be *nods*
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Yeah but I still like to be polite...
I fail miserably but I try anyway.
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haha
don't worry
manner is an outdated concept anyway...
much like logic.
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Well I as aiming for some degree of class. Although I expect thats hard to do when you're naked, stoned out your mind and capable of anything.
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I don't know
there's a certain sort of charm about it...
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I think we should talk as though its the 19th century to consempate
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Oh how sultry of you madame I expected higher conviction this fair eve.
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now you preposition in me in such a convincing and agreeable manner, I am feeling unduly swayed.
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What you lack in conviction milady you make up for in spirit and curtsey.
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and what you sir lack in manners and propriety you make up for in charm and elegance
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Sir... sir... does one not hath the bosom to be a lady?
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one has the bosom certainly, but neither the manners nor the appropriate thoughts to be anything but the more unruliest of men
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