HOME | DD

FirstSarge — For Services Rendered...
Published: 2011-01-18 02:08:39 +0000 UTC; Views: 490; Favourites: 4; Downloads: 2
Redirect to original
Description The place never failed to depress me. You can't polish a turd. The walls of the waiting area were painted off white and they had made an effort to buy a superior quality of cheap, shabby furniture. Around the corner it was different. The walls were an institutional green. The mortar was falling off the cinder block walls. The VA hospital had been built sometime in the last century and looked it. The patients looked it too.

My arm had been acting up again. It was probably older than I was. I often wondered about the guy who had it before me. It was an artificial black. I was a natural white. Not a good match, but what the hell do they care.

Most of the people waiting in the "lounge" as they called it were quiet. Some sleeping. I couldn't help but wonder if they were homeless and had been awake somewhere all night and came here to sleep when the doors opened in the morning.

A quadriplegic sat down next to me. I could see the framework of his aluminium and carbon exoskeleton underneath his grimy nylon track suit. A lead from the suit snaked up from a collar around his neck and jacked into the port behind his right ear.
His limbs vibrated slightly as the skeleton tried to make sense of the random firings of the brain at rest. He'd been plazed. He raised a paper cone of coffee to his lips. I expected him to spill half of it over himself, but he handled it with great aplomb.

Normally I keep my mouth shut. I just want to get in and get out so I can head back to my shitty flat and get drunk. This time I didn't. I wish I had.

"Luna," I asked.

"Mars."

"Corps?" Mars was fairly crawling with Marines since the insurrection.

"Army."

"No shit. I was Army too. I got this beauty on Europa." I tried to lift my mechanical negro arm. It whined noncommittally and failed to move. He turned his head to look me in the eye. His limbs shivered harder from the mixed signals it was receiving.

"You always talk this much?"

"No, I… um…," I shut up.

"It's okay. You felt like you had to talk to me, right?"

"Yeah, it's weird because…,"

"Because, you just want to get your nigger arm adjusted, go back to your pathetic shit hole of an apartment and drink yourself to death."

"Hey, who the fuck are you…"

"Relax, you know who I am."

I thought for a moment. "No. No. Oh God, No!"

"Good for you. Give the boy a cigar. It's time for reveille. Wakey wakey, eggs and baky…"

I awoke just in time to feel the nurse yank the lead from the port behind my right ear. Doctor Mayerson stood at my side. "I'm sorry Sergeant. The nerve attenuation from the plasma blast is incompatible with the fractal rate of the exoskeleton available to you. I'm sorry; we can do nothing for you now. Perhaps, if you have civilian insurance… No? Too bad you weren't an officer."

I looked down to where my arms and legs had been and screamed.
Related content
Comments: 13

Rafellin [2011-11-20 15:28:47 +0000 UTC]

Ouch. The waking from a dream trope amped up nicely.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

All-My-Darkness [2011-01-20 22:54:56 +0000 UTC]

Heh,

Glad that hit the spot.

I altered it just enough and you got the reference,

Nice one.

My fav.

I've got a plan so cunning, you could put a tail on it and call it a weasel.
(The lord of adders black)

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2011-01-21 01:39:00 +0000 UTC]

I told a few friends that joke last night. It went over really well. Our priest got an especially big kick out of it.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2011-01-21 02:39:01 +0000 UTC]

Haha,cool,
even the robes had a giggle.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2011-01-21 02:59:06 +0000 UTC]

Yeah, here's one he really liked. He just laughed, shook his head, looked at me again and walked away. I've heard he tells it with some modification.

One day during the homily, Father spoke of the trying life as a priest.

A man and his son were so moved by his words that they invited him on their fishung trip later that afternoon.

The priest had a strike and reeled in the biggest trout that any of them had ever seen.

In his excitment the boy exclaimed, "That's one big son of a bitch." The priest was understanably shocked. The father quickly explained that that was the local name for this variety of trout (presumably the boy was beaten later).

The priest returned back to the rectory and the houskeeper told him that the Pope would be stopping by later on his tour of the States.

"Would you please clean and cook this big son of a bitch?"

"FATHER," she exclaimed in shock.

"It's okay," he said laughing, "that's what the fish is called.

Mollified, she took the fish to the kitchen.

That night after dinner the Pope sat back and told them what a fine dinner it had been, the priest proudly said, "I caught that big son of a bitch."

The houskeeper said, "I cleaned and cooked that big son of a bitch."

The Pope looked at both of them, smiled and said, "You motherfuckers are allright."

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

All-My-Darkness [2011-01-18 18:30:53 +0000 UTC]

Now thats disturbing pie

The stump man cometh

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2011-01-18 23:05:43 +0000 UTC]

Hahaha. Thanks.

You have given me a brilliant (I suspect I am becoming more British all of the time. I say Brilliant alot. Or is it just a Weasley thing) idea.

My first book of short stories shall be entitled; A Taste of ie:!!!. Mainly for the WTF factor.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2011-01-19 00:21:32 +0000 UTC]

I say!

Be a good chap and write me a fucked up tale what!

Tip top!

Hahah...Britsh enough yet?

I will always happily engage lock on with WTF tales
flying at me anyday.

Serve me hot orders of crazy pie with sick imagination
custard.

I got a big spoon ready.

(Grin)

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2011-01-19 02:24:17 +0000 UTC]

The question is, can I write anything more screwed up than Me and My Shadow? That's pretty fucked up right there.

You know, I am one of the very few heterosexual males in the world who reads Agatha Christie. I always wanted to write about one of those quaint little villages in her stories.

Alas, my personal experience with England is confined to London. I need to get back over there, find an obscure little place like Wainscotting (We've been mentioned on telly), get really drunk and tell everybody I'm Canadian.

I'll bet I'd have some stories to write then. Particularly if I went on a tirade and said that the place would have been better off if the Germans would have won.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2011-01-19 03:55:57 +0000 UTC]

Heh.

Now that would be funny.

I have one such tale, an old joke. You will need to hide it perhaps.

I decided to star you in it.

A small English pub shortly after WW2 has ended.

First Sarge walks in to it on story recon mission.

Across the bar Sarge spies the impossible.

Hitler is skulling stiens of beer with Goebbels.

He strolls over, eyes them suspiciously.

WTF.

Aren’t you Adolf Hitler, the leader of the 3rd Reich and the infamous Joseph Goebbels Minister of Propaganda! I thought you two were dead!

No. (nonplussed) We survived, through a cunning plan.

I see. So….. what are you doing here, in a small quaint British village?

Goebbels flashes Sarge a smile , "We have a new plan, we intend to kill six million Jews and one postman."

Sarges mind races. "But why do you want to kill one postman?"

Goebbels shouts over to Hitler: "You See Adolf, I told you, no one gives a shit about the Jews"

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2011-01-20 01:17:01 +0000 UTC]

Ahahahahaha. I will retell that one many times over.

And this line. "No. (nonplussed) We survived, through a cunning plan." I can see Baldrick as Goebbels.

I am still laughing.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

E-xavier [2011-01-18 07:48:55 +0000 UTC]

Okay, this piece of work seems straight forward enough and the imagery is great, it explains just enough for the reader to be able to imagine what it would look like with only minimal effort making this an easy read. There is a sense of returned dislike for colored people, a trait frowned upon by todays society. All in all with the curve ball at the end, the piece catches the attention from the first word and holds it till the end.

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

FirstSarge In reply to E-xavier [2011-01-18 23:10:22 +0000 UTC]

Thanks. I wanted to show the exasperation of soldiers on their return home. The black prosthesis was to show that they really didn't give a damn.

The use of "nigger" served two purposes. One to drive home the feeling of frustration. And two; to piss off the PC people and show them that you just can't stick your head in the sand and expect things to go away.

👍: 0 ⏩: 0