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Published: 2011-09-23 15:39:52 +0000 UTC; Views: 1066; Favourites: 13; Downloads: 8
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She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Long blond hair pulled back in a ponytail. Soft blue eyes. She had on a rumpled olive drab Viet Nam era jacket. An embroidered patch of a bald eagles head adorned the right shoulder. It was worth a small fortune. Obviously she had money.She was drinking a Jovian Blast. A cacophony of liqueurs carefully layered to represent the banded planet. A sliver of dry ice added to the otherworldly affect.
Despite being over six feet, muscular but not burly and possessing weathered good looks, he was still uneasy around women. He slammed back a shot of Jack Daniel's. The amber fluid gave him the strength needed to approach her.
He walked up beside her, started to speak, looked away and tapped his drink order into the bar top. "Um, hi," he finally managed.
"Hello yourself," she replied. It would have been mocking if it weren't for the disarming smile. She found his unease cute. "Can I buy you a drink?" Her boldness caught him off guard. Before he could splutter some incoherent nonsense, his beer appeared and he quickly took a swig.
"You're cute," she said. A spray of beer showered the bar.
"I… um… I'm sorry. I… didn't mean to bother you… I," he stammered, as the bar, somewhat pissed, cleaned itself.
She placed a hand atop his. "Don't worry, I don't bite. Sit down."
"Really?" A huge grin spread across his face. "I mean, thank you," he replied a little more solemnly. Stupid, stupid, stupid, he thought, mentally kicking himself. Her soft smile never faltered.
"I'm Rachel," she said extending a hand, "and you are."
He took her hand and fell into her eyes. "I'm uh, I'm… I'm Ray. I'm an architect. I designed this tower. I'm really proud of the docking ports. The owners originally wanted a single docking area on the roof, but I thought the individual ten car docking ports scattered on the outside of the tower added to the overall aesthetics of the tower itself. What do you think," he blurted in one breath. He plunged his face once again into his beer. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
"I think you're cute." A second stream of beer shot out. If the bar had eyes to roll, it would have rolled them. Had it a head, it would have slowly shaken it while making "Tsk tsk tsk" sounds. Instead it just quietly cleaned up and reminded itself that it was payday.
Embarrassed, he turned and stared out of the floor to ceiling windows. From the 173rd floor lounge, they offered a breathtaking view of Dallas. He could see a shuttle lifting off from the port at Arlington, bound for the orbiting launch facility.
"What do you see," she asked quietly.
"I see… Everything." He turned towards her. Again he plunged headlong into those deep blue eyes. A split second of terror washed over him as he leaned forward and kissed her. She took his face in her tiny hands.
Somewhere in a room smelling of antiseptic and painted neutral beige, Ray raised a withered and liver spotted hand to his temple and removed the memory augmentation device. The vision of his wife, their first meeting, slowly slipped from his mind. He smiled a sad smile as a tear rolled down his cheek.
He stared up at the ceiling for a moment. He thought of Rachel, gone many years. He turned to the medical technician waiting patiently by his bed. "I'm ready," he said.
The med tech inserted a syringe into Ray's catheter and depressed the plunger.
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Comments: 38
TheMadMulatto [2012-04-09 10:31:50 +0000 UTC]
Wonderful thing to replay as a last living memory... I'd certainly want that kind of smile in my heart at the end.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
All-My-Darkness [2012-04-09 10:27:42 +0000 UTC]
Dear Mr. Sarge,
WTF.
Is this what happens when you finally relent and write something romantic for the missus?
Your main character has to top himself afterwards?
Is this a view on love I wonder...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2012-04-09 14:22:30 +0000 UTC]
Well, the missus has asked me to write a nice romantic story for her for quite some time. To date this is the closest I have come. Alas, as in most of my stories someone dies.
The first one I tried was To Sleep, Perchance.... No one died in that one, but...
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2012-04-10 08:05:27 +0000 UTC]
Keep trying.
Maybe both will make it out one day.
You can always kill them horrifcally in part 2 instead?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2012-04-11 13:41:43 +0000 UTC]
Okay, my hero is Hemingway. Credited for writing such great romances as A Farewell to Arms and The Sun Also Rises.
Did I miss something? A synopsis of Sun.
Allusion to a romance that existed before the war (Brett). The general depravity of his friends. Hatred of Jews. The promiscuity of Brett. Some fantastic description of the Spanish countryside. A fishing story. Great description of bullfighting (which is why I went to Spain... much better in the book), drunken fights and a resolution that could be summed up in a sentence: "Couldn't we have had a marvelous life if only your penis worked?"
I think my history precludes the great romance.
👍: 0 ⏩: 2
All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2012-04-14 18:53:57 +0000 UTC]
I lied.
Id take the piss forever.
haha.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2012-04-14 18:52:28 +0000 UTC]
I have never read any Hemmingway.
I know. I need to. I will.
I like the sound of the tale.
Id be proud to have lived that story by the sound of it.
BUT
I refuse to commnent on a friends use misuese / over use / ouright abuse of his wang
EVER.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2012-04-14 19:10:51 +0000 UTC]
He is the finest writer ever in my opinion. Shakespear does not count. He is in a totally different class.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2012-05-06 13:17:24 +0000 UTC]
I really will get to this guy.
EVERYONE vaunts his work.
Its getting embarrsing I have not haha.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to All-My-Darkness [2012-05-09 15:37:23 +0000 UTC]
Dude.
If you are not into him now, then perhaps you might not like him. I read him when I was a boy.
He is a difficult read. I learned my choppy, terse style from him. It fit ME. He is belligerant, somtimes obfuscatory... is that a word?
To me, The Old Man and the SEA, in my opinion his seminal work, seems to be two dimensional, yet all encompassing. IT shows a MAN to his bare bones. He shreds humanity and examines it for what it is. His prose is not elegant except for it's simplicity.
His work is plain, dirty and lived in.
Of course I also admire the fact that in reality, he was one badass. You didn't fuck with Ernie.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
All-My-Darkness In reply to FirstSarge [2012-08-13 19:36:40 +0000 UTC]
The wife has some of his books and I think I should still have a gander at them.
I want to know how Badass a man with a name like Ernie can be.
Sounds like that gay muppet who shacked up with Bert.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Rafellin [2011-10-23 15:22:32 +0000 UTC]
As I said on 365, a fine piece of your usual grit with a superb emotive beartrap at the end.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
Rafellin [2011-10-23 15:21:20 +0000 UTC]
As I said over on 365, your usual grit with a fine emotive beartrap in the end. Sweet work.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
FirstSarge In reply to QuirkyToothbrush [2011-10-08 10:59:59 +0000 UTC]
Thank you. I am happy to be recognized here. Quite the honour.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to KinyoLee [2011-09-28 18:17:06 +0000 UTC]
Thk you. I really appreciate that.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0
DailyLitDeviations [2011-09-27 03:22:41 +0000 UTC]
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by DLD (Daily Literature Deviations) in a news article that can be found here [link]
Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by ing the News Article.
Keep writing and keep creating.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to DailyLitDeviations [2011-09-27 11:54:10 +0000 UTC]
Thank you very much to who ever recommended my story for the DLD. It is quite an honour to be recognized here at dA.
My missus has been asking me for a long time to write a sweet, romantic piece. I try, but usually mayhem ensues and it all goes downhill from there.
I think this is as close as I am going to get Sweetheart.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
KreepingSpawn [2011-09-24 20:51:45 +0000 UTC]
Not quite as bleak as some of yours, Sarge.
Nicely done.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to KreepingSpawn [2011-09-25 00:39:33 +0000 UTC]
But she was already dead, and he was dying by physicians assistant assisted suicide. Doesn't that count for some bleakness?
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
KreepingSpawn In reply to FirstSarge [2011-09-25 11:31:22 +0000 UTC]
Not as much as I think you want it too.
I didn't get the impression that she died a horrible premature death. And he had obviously lived a long, satisfying life.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to KreepingSpawn [2011-09-25 11:56:16 +0000 UTC]
Okay, I admit it. I'm guessing that that was probably the first and only woman he had ever loved. She probably died of old age and he just kept going. His last tear was probably a happy tear since he was going to see her again.
Okay, let's just say somebody else wrote it and in a drunken stupor I put my name on it.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
calcified In reply to FirstSarge [2011-09-23 19:53:05 +0000 UTC]
No prob, and thanks for the llama!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
safia3 [2011-09-23 16:49:03 +0000 UTC]
Aw, he'll be with Rachel shortly. Gosh, this was so good!
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to safia3 [2011-09-23 18:52:16 +0000 UTC]
Thanks.
I was going to end the story with something like what you wrote, but I thought it would be too much saccharine.
My missus has been on me for years to write something romantic. It always ends the same, somebody winds up dead. In one story, First Date the female ate the guys head.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
safia3 In reply to FirstSarge [2011-09-23 18:54:22 +0000 UTC]
LOL...well, that's an interesting twist.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
FirstSarge In reply to safia3 [2011-09-23 19:40:43 +0000 UTC]
Yes, it was very touching... in context for the female anyway. The nissus didn't approve.
👍: 0 ⏩: 0


