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Description
Evident as it is, that you don’t say “thanks” to pity
its role is crucial on those occasions
when shock severs words from speech
and apologies are all one can give.

You said;
“There are sorrier cases than I,
save your sympathy for those who believed they could be mended.”

Originally, your flesh began to shrink to fit your bone,
(perhaps, when things have gone too far
the only direction they have left to go
is in reverse)
but today,
your skeleton is exposed through cling film skin
like a body emerging from dirty water,
and the detectives are frowning -
confused and fascinated -
because the longer they stand there staring,
the thicker the ice begins to form.

However selfish and arrogant it may be
to suffer ache and frustration
knowing that no matter how much they crave to recover you
and breathe life into your water-logged veins,
they’re unable to scratch the surface
let alone break the ice.

They told me this was a good thing,
because this way, they’d never get the urge to tear you open
just to see what secrets you kept inside.

How disdainful and curious it is,
the more they beat themselves up about failing you
the greater your sense of relief became.
You never wanted to be saved.

You said;
“There are sorrier cases than I,
of all those who will die, at least I’ve chosen my own demise.”

All it takes is breath to say you’ll die for the ones you love
but when you run out of oxygen
all that’s left is the understanding that you wanted to -
just a little too much.

Description
Evident as it is, that you don’t say “thanks” to pity
its role is crucial on those occasions
when shock severs words from speech
and apologies are all one can give.

You said;
“There are sorrier cases than I,
save your sympathy for those who believed they could be mended.”

Originally, your flesh began to shrink to fit your bone,
(perhaps, when things have gone too far
the only direction they have left to go
is in reverse)
but today,
your skeleton is exposed through cling film skin
like a body emerging from dirty water,
and the detectives are frowning -
confused and fascinated -
because the longer they stand there staring,
the thicker the ice begins to form.

However selfish and arrogant it may be
to suffer ache and frustration
knowing that no matter how much they crave to recover you
and breathe life into your water-logged veins,
they’re unable to scratch the surface
let alone break the ice.

They told me this was a good thing,
because this way, they’d never get the urge to tear you open
just to see what secrets you kept inside.

How disdainful and curious it is,
the more they beat themselves up about failing you
the greater your sense of relief became.
You never wanted to be saved.

You said;
“There are sorrier cases than I,
of all those who will die, at least I’ve chosen my own demise.”

All it takes is breath to say you’ll die for the ones you love
but when you run out of oxygen
all that’s left is the understanding that you wanted to -
just a little too much.