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Foxy-Sketches — Help Stamp
Published: 2009-10-21 03:19:22 +0000 UTC; Views: 8395; Favourites: 368; Downloads: 24
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Description
4/19/2015 Decided to update this again~Been a while, huh? I don't come onto this account anymore, but occasionally I come on to read comments. I said it before, but thank you for all of your stories. All but one of the comments have been inspiring stories and constructive opinions. Again, I don't come here often, but this is a topic I am always open to talking about, as long as we're both willing to listen to each other
I'm a teacher now, and trust me - I see a lot and am apart of many people's lives. I know many stories, I know many situations, I know it isn't black and white. Oh good Lord, do I know there are grey areas. My jobs requires me to separate myself from my opinions. When I walk into the classroom my opinions don't matter - what matters is that my students are safe and that I will do anything for them. It's a surreal feeling - being so protective of so many, even though I may severely disagree with their decisions or stances.
A lot has changed, but I'll always keep my original description up. I feel like that no matter how much I change and grow that it's important to remember where I've been, no matter how dark (and hypercritical) it was. This stamp means a bunch of things to different people, so please don't see it as one opinion. Read the comments; send me a note on my main account; inspire real-life conversations. But don't assume. That's what I did a lot of when I was younger. At the same time though not everything has changed. There will always be truth in what I wrote years ago, but people aren't stagnant. We grow and evolve, and I hope these comments do that for you in some way~
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11/9/2012: I'd like to note that I plan on changing/adding to this description. Talking to the people who have left comments has given me, and others, insight, and I want to express my feelings behind this stamp better. When this was originally written, I myself was in a terrible part of my life (and in many ways, I still am). I am and always will be open to talking about the nature of this stamp, and I thank everyone for being mature about our conversations thus far
Thank you all for the support and sharing your stories with regards to this stamp - it's been a real experience, and I always hope for the best who are still seeking for answers 
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i could say so much about this stamp, but i'll keep it to a minimum just cuz i don't to be here all night...
first off, this was inspired by In-The-Machine 's stamp, as seen here: in-the-machine.deviantart.com/…
now, my thoughts and what this stamp means:
in plain, simple words i am sick and tired of people acting like they don't have anyone in the world who cares for them and thinking that there is no way out. that alcohol, drugs, cutting, and isolation are the only ways to feel better. that they know what they need to become "better" and don't need anyone to help. its total bullshit.
i myself have a father who i think needs psychological help with getting over whatever problems he had in the past with his family. does he ever listen to me when i try to talk to him about it or try stay calm when i ever have serious conversations about him with him? no, he doesn't. hence i'm tired of trying to help him because he doesn't want it. you can't help people who don't want to change, which is why i am so sick of listening to stupid little attention whore bitch about how horrible their lives are and how no one loves them. if they seriously gave a shit, they'd get help. true, some people have absolutely no one to turn to, but i'm talking about those people who think that no counselor can help them; that their parent's hate them; that none of their friends "know what they're going through." no - their friend's DON'T know what they're going through because they refuse to let anyone in. THAT'S why they have no one to turn to. until they realize that the world isn't out to ruin their lives, they will never get better, they will never be happy, and they will continue to be considered a failure.
on another note, no - i do not believe in pitying people who don't deserve it. pity only lets the person know that what they are doing (isolation through despair or anger, acts of anger, self-harm, drugs, alcohol) is ok since it gets them the attention that they feel they never got, so they continue to do these things. and yes, i do consider "simply" being in a constant bad mood to be as equally bad and influential as abusing alcohol/drugs because they all hurt others, they hurt the person doing it, and they will never help the person doing it regardless of how much it makes them feel "good". that "good" feeling is a cover-up and a method of sheer avoidence to the want to actually try to change and get better. and if we try to measure how important or severe someone's problem is, then no one would ever want to get help because they're not as important as others and don't deserve the attention. and yes, things like cutting are just as bad as alcohol/drug abuse in my eyes.
keep in mind that this is NOT everything that i think or believe. so before you get mad at me for not taking this or that into consideration, just shut up and stop yourself from being an idiot. express your opinion, yes, but do so in an intelligent manner.
i will open comments for a little bit, but as soon as i get a single idiotic comment they will close. this stamp is for those who feel the same as me.
and lastly, don't try to defend youself if you are someone who inflicts self-harm/drinks excessively/does drugs. i don't care to hear your story, and you should be busy telling your story to someone who can actually HELP YOU. not to some college student who just felt like expressing her own opinion.
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Comments: 122
I had this happen to me loss a friend due to her addictive stalking towards her ex mutiple time i had to help i wish i didn't nothing is wrong of saying no especially when it isn't your relationship
I tried put it out there she needs help her yes ma'ams act like oh she not that she innocent
Even gave proof but ya know its to harsh but i rather tell the truth than lie about someone who kept sucide baiting of a ex that clearly doesn't want her
She is deinal still and says it was "test" when i know it wasn't it was downright a unhealthy addiction that lost her many people
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Asking for help does not make you weak. IMO, asking for help means you realize that drugs, alcohol, or other "hang ups" are not the answer, but you don't know what to do. Even if you feel you can't go to someone in your family, or one of your friends, there is ALWAYS someone to talk to. Start with talking to your doctor, or your priest, rabbi, or equivalent in whatever religion your in (I'm sorry, I don't know all of the titles). When I was diagnosed with depression, my doctor suggested a psychiatrist, and my psychiatrist suggested therapy, and I am now seeing both a psychiatrist and a therapist once a month, and sometimes, when things are happening, and I can't wait until my next appointment, I call my therapist and see if we can move the appointment up. Once, she even talked to me over the phone, and I felt better about the situation.
I hate it when people post things all the time about being unable to talk to someone and how they're going to kill themselves because nobody loves them. Then people post on their journals saying "oh no! Don't do that! Forget all those haters! You are loved! We love you!" I think a lot of times they do it for attention. Usually, if I see someone doing that, I tell them to call their doctor, or a suicide hotline. To quote my father, "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem." I can always talk to my family, even when I only need someone to listen.
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It makes no sense when people rant, refuse to seek help, refuse to get off the internet and act like its the end of the world for a few petty reasons and speak in a suicidal manner when they're obviously not depressed. They're just extremely dumb, pathetic, naive and are quick to assume things for themselves without using their tiny brain. When people tell them the obvious advice, then what could we do? Maybe they're actually just faking it for attention or they are just the dumbest people acting like 12-year-olds on the internet, whining without having any common sense or understanding their mistakes. I know one person who I look at her account from time to time to watch her exaggerate her problems. She doesn't. To me, it seems like she's manipulating her friends/peer's concern for her to get attention. Heck, hardly any of them noticed how she kept saying she'll kill herself over and over and over again and other ridiculous nonsense, but sooner than later, she's like 'ok I won't kill myself!'. Honestly, those are willing to help are so naive to even realize her actions and the dumb stories are just to waste their time because they've made so much effort and she took them for granted, literally.
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Is there any way of asking for sympathy that isn't wrong? I suppose you shouldn't ask for sympathy.
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I love this stamp, I should show it to people who go around self-diagnosing themselves then talking about it non-stop to get sympathy for something they may or may not even have
I've cut and hurt myself in many other ways, I had once convinced myself that no one would miss me and i'd be better off dead.
But I then realised, that even if no one would miss me (which isn't true at all) I need to improve on myself to make sure that there are people out there that will like me for me. I ended up pushing everyone away, and that was making things worse, I was the one adding fuel to the fire, no one else, not matter how much I blamed them. I went to the doctors and asked for help, I didn't know if it'd work, but I just wanted to TRY it because if it's an option to help you, you should grab it and do something with it.
I'm still a long way to go, but just by going to the doctors, I felt lighter, and so much happier in myself.
Sure, the dark thoughts are still there, they may never leave, but I can ease them with baby step.
For once I actually felt proud of myself and not worthless at all.
Maybe one day, I won't have to take medicine, will be able to do things without overthinking, and most importantly, not be afraid
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Sorry for the late reply, but thank you so much for sharing~
Baby steps are such a key point and something I think a lot of people forget. When I started my depression and anxiety medications, I had some friends and family that asked me two days after starting the pills if I felt better. I had to explain to them that the pills don't make me feel better - they just make me able to cope. The rest of the battle was my own. It's always worth to try things though because we never know what will help until we try
You should feel very proud of yourself, and I am proud of you too. I hope for nothing but the best for you~
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Baby steps can be very frustrating to a lot of people, I found that when I had it bad, I tried to get things all sorted and done all at once as quick as possible.
My family don't know I'm taking meds, but my friends are quite understanding (for those that haven't really experienced depression) and for that I'm grateful.
It's also good to educate people on these things, especially if they don't understand properly, and just jump to all these conclusions
Like as you said, a lot of people believe that meds make you feel better, when It's actually the support that helps. (for me anyway)
Aww thanks for your kind words
I hope the best for you too
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Thank you, and you're welcome 
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Oh wait, you're a troll. Nevermind - sorry I responded.
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"Sometimes you can't help yourself."
"...before assuming people like this exist."
I'm one of those people. I got help. We exist, and if you read the comments you'd know that. There are amazing stories in the comments, as well as ones of those who still need help.
As stated in the description, I'm open to hearing people's opinions and talking about. But calling me a prick isn't helping anyone.
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I knew a girl that was depressed, self-harmed, etc. She was bad at drawing, and was overall a self-centered and mean person. Instead of working in some way to help herself, she just complained about everything. About being depressed. About being a bad artist. About how I wouldn't let her self-harm. About what an awful person she was-- but then she turned around and treated me like shit because I work to get better, stopped self-harming and I'm a kind and empathetic person and a good artist. She acted jealous of me, even because my scars were deeper than her scars. .-. I spend months of my life trying to help her, and all I got was a headache and a trip to a mental hospital.
This isn't the first time I've done this, either. You can only help people if they want help, and I've finally learned that.
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I had someone like that in high school. He ruined many aspects of my life, including my first relationship. He treated others terribly, which was so difficult because there were those who wanted to help him. But yeah - there just wasn't anything we could think to do 
That's why it's always important to help when we can, because a lot of times it feels like we can't. Nothing is worse than the times where I wanted to help my friends but couldn't discover how to do it, and the opposite where my friends couldn't help me.
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This speaks to me quite a bit.. I was never a cutter, and I have never taken drugs or alcohol.. but there have been dark days where I have been tempted.. I've steeled myself from such thoughts. Being alone sucks, I should know.. and depression is a constant and persistent beast that torments my every waking moment. I may not have any blood relatives (LONG story), but at least I have my friends and boyfriend for support as I try to fix what little of my life and self-worth survived from the past. So much is chaining me down, but I want to break those chains and manage to live a normal life for a change. Any advice for a person who is broke and crippled?
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I've definitely had the thought of suicide, but like you I never entertained it. It doesn't mean those thoughts don't happen though
Everyone's situations is different, but from what I have experienced and what I tell my students I can say that (most of the time) it helps to get help. Talking to my psychologist and psychiatrist has helped me immensely, because I also live alone and depression can be crippling. They actually both helped me get off of the medication for depression and anxiety (I was on so many pills) and helped me get my life back on track. I am definitely an advocate for medication - it's not a fix-all, but it helps the physical side of depression.
Like I said - everyone is different, but I hope that what I've said helps you in any way
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I love this stamp. ouo And I agree with a lot of your aspects, speaking as another being with Depression and Anxiety. Sure, I have my bad days, where everyone better run from me, before I chew off their head. |D But I'm trying to make a effort to help myself, since no professional's have been much help, other than a paid wailing wall I can bitch at. xD And I've actually done pretty well for my own standards. 
Then again I'm probably a hypocrite, since I'm guilty of bitching and whining like I have no one and that my life sucks. |D I try to avoid it, but some times it just shits out before I think. |D *bricked*
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lol, glad you like it! 
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You inspired me to make a similar stamp. I hope you don't mind.
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Not at all - I'm glad it inspire you
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That makes me sad to hear 
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I got help, professional help.
It isn't helping.
I don't know what to do.
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Well I'm going back to the hospital so hopefully that will help.
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In my experience, most try to get help all the time and others ignore/push them away. My friends did that to me. I asked them to help me get help, to support me, and they all ignored me. That made me not want to get help, and give up. Of course, 3 years later I got help and I'm a recovered self-harmer. But I owe that victory to myself and myself only. It's difficult to bring yourself to ask for help when no one answers you. And it's no one's fault.
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Indeed - I have family members that ignore me as well. I've even had a few go as far as to call me wrong and hurt me further. Nothing is ever easy. I'm not placing blame anywhere, and hearing stories like yours are what this stamp is about, and it makes me very happy. Thank you for sharing your story - I'm glad you were able to identify how to get the help you wanted and that you were successful
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It is extremely hard getting help. But, when people do, they are incredibly brave, and can sometimes save a life, their own or others. 3 months ago, for a very long time, I was suicidal. But, I sought help. I got my mother and father to help me, and I am no longer suicidal. I hope this can be a inspiration to others.
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I definitely find you as an inspiration, even I haven't been through exactly what you've gone through
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Thank you
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Do people like you ever consider that it is hard getting help? Cutting is like an addiction, and if you get help you will be forced to stop. I disagree with your statement, but I am not going to harass you or anything. Just saying, getting help isn't all that easy.
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I know - many others have mentioned this, and I've had great conversations with them here in the comments section
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Yep. Sometimes I love reading fights on here....does that make me a bad person? At least I don't start them, right?
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Oh, there's no fights in this comment section
lol, I totally get you though - I've definitely gone on comment journeys here on DA and on YouTube many times
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Maybe I don't agree with you completely, but I like that you expressed your opinion in rather, well, direct manner, but still like an intelligent, cultured person. I saw many opinions here on deviantart that people you're talking about are a waste of space and such, and that won't help anybody. Your text can. (also sorry if there are any mistakes)
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I've definitely learned a lot more from talking to people here on DA, so I hope to update my description when I have the time. But I am still glad that you find it helpful in any way.
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Nice to know that I could find more intellectual people around here. I agree with you. A more painful struggle happens when you have to keep things hidden. It's when you wanna burst out crying at night but have to control yourself because you can't h e swollen eyes in the morning. The world will question you for something you can never explain
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Thank you
That's very flattering of you to say, but I wouldn't say it's a complete matter of intelligence though. It's such a difficult thing to deal with, and I know there are people who are out there who understand that keeping things in only makes things worse. But sometimes we don't really have a choice (I speak from personal experience). Again, thank you though, and I'm glad you agree
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Nail. On. The. Head! Change comes from inside you, and if you can't find it in yourself, then no counselling or cries for attention are going to fix anything.
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thank you for your support on this stamp
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nicely said. i appreciate the truth in this and agree that using cutting, drinking and other extremes as a cry for attention is wrong. but many people cant go to psychologists and cant get the help they need, and the "help" that people try to give them isnt always what they need. for some people help doesn't always help
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i'm glad you appreciate some of the things i said
i've actually been thinking about re-writing the description, since my own personal life experiences have changed many of these thoughts, including talking to people like you about the subject
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I don't want to get into my own story of why I support this, but thank you so much for making this. It's a great message that really needs to be spread.
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i'm still happy that it means something to you one way or another
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Well said. Very powerful.
But its really not that simple. Some get the help, but is it ever enough? For some its not.
I have a question for you. Have you ever suffered through the addictions you stated above? If not then, you believe what everyone else like you does. Its taboo. Its weak. Its pathetic. Stupid. But how can you know the truth if you've never been in those situations?
Please, I honestly mean no disrespect by any of this...
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i know each and every person is different in any given situation. for my stamp though, i am specifically speaking from my own experiences and my own personal beliefs from the many instances i have experienced this. i myself have experienced severe depression, but i immediately sought out help (and it helped me). i have a friend and family member who are alcoholics; i have friends who cut; i've had many close friends attempt suicide. i never said it's simple at all - it's far, FAR from it. it isn't weak, it isn't pathetic, and it isn't stupid. it is serious, and should be taken seriously to those who suffer and those who know someone suffering. i am FOR people talking, seeking help, and growing. like i said - i know it isn't easy, but from my own personally experience, these are just a few words i've shared.
i take no offence to what you've said 
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Very true. All of what you said and I totally see where you're coming from now. Thank you for clarifying.
But I know in my case getting help... Well, didn't help. If that makes sense. I just learned to hide it all more effectively. Which has actually allowed it to escalate. Completely backfired. But I guess it put everyone else's mind at ease...
There comes a point when you are the only one that can save you from yourself... I guess that's what I'm getting at. Sorry I'm rambling now.
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You've actually got to get help by someone that won't take advantage of you. It,S easy to say "get help". I've met people that "wanted to help me" in my life, all they did is take advantage of me, lie to me, the last asshole raped me. I think twice before asking for help now. People say "you gotta trust people, open up, seek help" then shit gets bigger. Trusting someone else with my problem, my life? No thank you.
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