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FreckledAndFearless β Of Pens and Pencils
Published: 2013-11-16 05:48:57 +0000 UTC; Views: 1564; Favourites: 76; Downloads: 0
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(6/5/14) Edit: More mistakes are found... Wow, I really suck... Please, if you see that I've screwed up anywhere else, let me know(12/16/13) Edit: Finally got around to fixing the spelling mistakes
I would love to hear what you think of the edits(11/18/13) Edit: Wow! I can't believe this got the Pick of the Day over at Daily Literature Deviations Today! Thanks everyone who commented at faved this poem, it really was a confidence booster, I wish I could hug all of you
Hey people of the World Wide Web, sorry I've seemed inactive. Rest assured, I'm not. I've just been working on a lot of crafts lately. Once I feel like I've got them looking right, I'll let you guys see
Anyway, this poem was not supposed to be about life...I starting writing it as a rant about how I hate pens, then this happened
I really tried to get this to be one of my best poems, I even took what I wrote and made a paper template from scratch just so it wouldn't look as messy as it did. I would love to hear what you guys think of it. Really give me what you think; does the pen/pencil effect work, can you feel how each of the words are written, so on and so on.
I hope you guys like this, let me know how I can improve
Oh...and sorry about my crappy handwriting...
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Comments: 33
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What a beautiful poem. It takes such a simple concept of writing, that ancient art, and draws in the mind a bigger picture of what it means to write. This poem sees beyond the uses of the pen and pencil, to the principles which those utilizations suggest. The very deliberate (and sometimes not deliberate) strokes and letters and words are a very basic technique, and that is good.
Truth and Dreams, Pen and Pencil. The poem's smooth and sophisticated flow towards connecting those phrases leaves one left with a profound shock on the discovery of their relationship.
Ultimately, the message is so True, because within the name Pencil, and within Dreams, is Pen, and is Truth. That is what this author has so eloquently displayed.
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Thank you very much for the critique, you are so very kind
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I'm logical pencils, how can I not compliment such awesomeness?
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i love it this is awesome just what i was looking for something with originality technique and personality i've never seen anything like this before it is impossible to find anthing like this ever i love it this is just pure perfection love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love love lovelove love love love love love love love
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Hear hear! Β Excellent work on this! Β
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Wonderful work, Abby! Very creative and insightful
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Thanks, it was a fun piece to work on
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You are most welcome. How have you been, btw?
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I really love the visual element to this. Such a cool idea, and the pen/pencil effect works marvelously.
I hate to nitpick on something you can't edit as easily as typed text, but weild should be spelled wield.
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Thanks for letting me know, apparently I'm terrible at finding my mistakes
And thanks for the comment, it's really great to hear from such a wonderful writer
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You're very welcome.
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I think this is wonderful. Not only is the message very truthful, but the way you put it into the paper is really creative.
I think you switched from pen to pencil on the right moments and the scribbles, drawings, smudges, etc add a really interesting twist to this piece (:
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Thank you, that means a lot to hear from such a great artist
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D'aww, you're welcome <3
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Not set in stone, but almost. I like it. To much for words. AWE. That is the only word that comes to mind.
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Thank you, it's so nice of you to leave feedback
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Always welcome!
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I actually thing the juxtaposition of pen and sword is very good, because it's counterintuitive. A sword 'seems' strong, it can take a life, but a pen 'seems' weak, but can change the course of history, sway a person, peoples, nations, think the Bible, Magna Cater, your Declaration of Independence, national anthems. Β The problem is only at times that the pen may cause some to take up a sword! Of course there's much more to your poem, but enough... Anyway, all just my thoughts, for whatever they're worth, and thanks for the poem and being interesting, nice work! 
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Thank you! That is rather insightful, I hadn't considered that point. Thanks for your input
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Hey, thanks! Do you think a digital keyboard is like the pen, reaches around the world [just rhetorical rubbish]...
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A wonderful poem, I enjoyed reading it a lot. The beginning, I must admit, made me cringe: the comparison between swords and pens, and especially the "absoluteness" of the latter, doesn't seem quite thought through. A blade blade is also a "tool of absoluteness" - once it's taken a life, that life can never be given back. I went back to look at it, and the sword and the "absoluteness" are actually not in the same paragraph; perhaps they were not meant to be associated; but because they are right next to each other, and because of the closing of the first paragraph ("it takes more courage to wield a pen") the one that follows seems like it elaborates on that thought, and in that context, the comparison lacks.
The rest read wonderfully and made me smile. I love what you've done with the presentation of the piece, the way you demonstrated the different things you were talking about by changing pen and handwriting.
Clever and thoroughly enjoyable!
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Thank you for the comment, I hadn't realized that the absoluteness of the sword would be looked at due to it's location in the text. As you mention it, they weren't meant to be associated in that way, but I love how you analyzed the text like that. It has given new light to--what I thought to be--a straight forward poem. Thanks very much for your incite.
Thanks for the taking the time to look over this piece and tell me what you think, it is very appreciated. I hope to impress you, like I have with this piece, in the future.
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I'm looking forward to it.
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Grats on the DLD, I admire your creativity. ^_^ There were some spelling errors here and there but that was all.
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Oh, there are spelling errors! My goodness, thanks for letting me know...
Thanks for the comment, it's great to know that people have enjoyed my work
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Thank you so much
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Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by DLD (Daily Literature Deviations) and has been selected as our βPick of the Dayβ. It is featured in a news article here and on our main page.
Keep writing and keep creating.
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Wow, this is such a honor, thank you so very much
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I'm not big on critiques . . . don't really feel I'm qualified to do so ~ that being said, I enjoyed your work very much . . . think it's a great view point and a very creative way of showing it.
Best ~ been a little while since you have posted something, glad you did.
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Thank you, that means a lot!
Sorry I've been slow on the submissions, I have been trying to get back into the swing of things
Hopefully it won't be too long till the next submission, thanks for being so interested
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