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Freds-head — Pepperpot
Published: 2010-12-02 20:34:15 +0000 UTC; Views: 558; Favourites: 4; Downloads: 4
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Description
Standing on the beachBroken glass in my hands
Mumbling to the waves
They don't understand
Lying in the rain
Waiting for the sun
A forgotten greeting card
The sentiment, long gone
Standing in the street
Spitting out the dust
Adverse to the litter
Saddened by the rust
Sitting on the fence
Watching debris float
Trying to make sense
The smell of creosote
Hiding from the world
In a corner back in time
Knowing who I was
And knowing what was mine
Voices in my head
Everything seems strange
Not losing my mind
But looking for a change
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Comments: 5
I love the imagery.
Also the rhyme isn't forced, which is a really good thing.
When I read the title my mind was preparing for alliteration (I don't really know why.. I can never figure out how my mind works..)
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thanks very much
i'm to blame for the title
it has no bearing whatsoever
but it is now the title
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I love the poem but how does it relate to the title? (My brain is not functioning at the moment)
I think punctuation would help this (especially breathing) because you have a perfect rhyme scheme and meter but I dont' konw where to breathe.
👍: 0 ⏩: 1
i don;t know where it came from
or where it was going
it was just a freeform peice
the title doesn't fit, i know
but nothing seemed to fit at the time
it was completely random
but, when i looked back on it
i found i actually liked it
glad you liked it too
thanks
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