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Griatch-art — Red Apples Lie: Aftermath
Published: 2012-11-01 03:01:01 +0000 UTC; Views: 1051; Favourites: 13; Downloads: 0
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Description
Aftermath"Aftermath" to what? Nobody's talking.
A study from my (pretty strange) own comic project Where Red Apples Lie. We see the "unknown girl" (seen in various snippets here on DA) and another character.
This is a variation on the black+white+red theme which I use for this work, so this is intentionally 3 colours only. And yes, she has only one leg (I had the crutches in there too, but removed them since it felt too cluttered).
Feedback welcome as always!
MyPaint + GIMP
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Griatch
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Comments: 21
She doesn't have an easy life. Graffiti is based off some photos of real graffiti I found. 
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Griatch
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Interesting work with the restricted palette and there are some parts of the picture that are very well made (the girl's hand and face, the wall with the graffiti, the gear on the wall).
I feel that there might be some slight overuse of the smudging tool in this picture. The shadows on the blanket and the clothes' folds look a bit too smooth and mostly lack texture and interest. Perhaps some rougher rendering with a textured brush on GIMP? Mind me, I'm telling you to remind myself.
However, this is a picture that tells a story and this is good per se. I would like to see it in the context of a comic.
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Thanks for the critique! I originally made this with much coarser structuring and sharp contrasts, but eventually softened things down since I felt it detracted from the focus of their faces. So whereas I don't agree with on more texturing per se it's certainly possible I overdid the softer transitions and lines. I think I'll have to wait a bit and come back to it later I think, thanks for pointing this out!
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Griatch
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Is the red and white behind her a TV screen of some sort? I'm reluctant to call it a window since light isn't pixelated through windows.
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Yes, that is correct, it's some sort of huge commercial display, probably showing part of some company logo. A window wouldn't really make sense.
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Griatch
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Her clothes are old or even broken now and then, but, however, they all seems to fit her sadness and loneliness so well!
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Her clothes are old or even broken now and then, but, however, they all seems to fit her sadness and loneliness so well!
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Indeed, she's not the most upbeat character, this.
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Griatch
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I feel weird. I caught myself that i'm not enjoying the picture as a viewer, spent more time finding things that bug me - despite the fact the picture is really good. Well, actually there is just one thing - the left part of the blanket (waist down of the man) is suddenly sharper, as if that is the focus of imaginary camera taking the picture. It averts my attention a bit from the characters. Other things than that are probably just my feelings. But well, i will write. As the backpack lies on the parapet, i imagine there has to be quite some room. The backpack's stuffed part is overhanging, so if it does not fall down, there should be more mass on the parapet than in the air. When i consider this, it seems there should not be so much red light on the blanket. Just my speculation
I'm not sure about one thing. The characters are clinging to each other, they are both involved. It looks to me like that, maybe my judgement is wrong. But the girl's right arm just hangs down, like she is just playing it. I don't know if that is intended. If there is real emotion, i imagine she would put both arms on the man.
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Hi dihitsu, thanks for the critique, most useful!
You are absolutely correct about the too-light shade of the wall next to her, I have darkened it. This also naturally puts the blanket in more shadow which might help to focus the image some more. I also "sharpened" the blanket a bit further up to make the difference less jarring. Check it out, should hopefully be better now.
The girl's arm is intentionally placed this way, yes. She's not big on emotions, I meant her expression and pose to make her look awkward "caring" for another person like this. He is definitely clinging more to her than she to him, that's for sure (see previous images of her exploring similar themes).
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Griatch
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Thanks for explaining the character's viewpoint. In that case you really achieved intended look.
I think the changes you made work well. I'm not sure (i am on another monitor now), but the atmosphere seems heavier with the darker tone.
And you reminded me, i still haven't browsed your whole gallery
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Lol, you know me under a lot of names or didn't u recognize me 0.0?
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Sure I do, I tend to use the nick used on the respective site though.
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Griatch
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Well, just nobody calls me like that so it very unfamiliar to me ^^
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This is the first time I believe I've seen her show any emotion.
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Out of curiosity, just what emotion do you see in her here?
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Griatch
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She looks upset... I think it's in her eyes. I'm used to her just having a blank stare.
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Fair enough.
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Griatch
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