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mayshing In reply to WandaRocket [2010-03-21 06:39:11 +0000 UTC]

thanks, that was tricky to figure out. XO

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mayshing In reply to irishkisame007 [2010-03-19 02:40:14 +0000 UTC]

lol thats a fun way to phrase it... "attacks with praise"

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irishkisame007 In reply to mayshing [2010-03-19 02:44:56 +0000 UTC]

*rubs the back of my neck with my hand sheepishly* Well I've been told I have a way with words ^^. By the way I read your manga, very interesting! If you want I could give you some constructive criticism! Not that its bad at all, it just needs a little work ^^.

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mayshing In reply to irishkisame007 [2010-03-19 05:28:27 +0000 UTC]

sure, fire away and i will take into consideration what needs to be improved.

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irishkisame007 In reply to mayshing [2010-03-19 15:08:35 +0000 UTC]

Well your story is a little direct, it hits the reader a little too fast. Its like a wave of information overtakes you in the first few pages. Most readers would go "Woah, wayyy to much info!" Instead, you should begin a story with simple characters, and then build on them; give a little back-story and go from there. ^^ Hope that wasnt too much to look at

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mayshing In reply to irishkisame007 [2010-03-19 18:22:45 +0000 UTC]

and all that directness is a lie. *shoots self*

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irishkisame007 In reply to mayshing [2010-03-19 19:34:44 +0000 UTC]

*gasp!*
Curse directness

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mayshing In reply to irishkisame007 [2010-03-19 21:03:58 +0000 UTC]

XD

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irishkisame007 In reply to mayshing [2010-03-22 04:04:37 +0000 UTC]

^^ Tis mearly what I do

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mayshing In reply to irishkisame007 [2010-03-19 18:19:44 +0000 UTC]

Not much at all, i was expecting 3 paragraphs. lol~

It is my intention to just throw the readers into the world and then explain all the details later,
the story itself has already been simplified quite a bit, focusing on only 2 main characters for 3 chapters,
the settings will slowly be explained.

They weren't meant to be understood right away, like going to any new countries,
that's how one will feel, a bit lost in the environment.

I like to make my readers feel a bit lost in a new world and what's going on in the chaos,
Jeremy is their only tour guide to guide them through all of it for now,
while he's still figuring it out himself.
You are giving me exactly the reaction I wanted,
that's good to know. Thank you for the feedback.

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irishkisame007 In reply to mayshing [2010-03-19 19:37:30 +0000 UTC]

Well I'm glad you got the reaction you wanted from a reader! ^^
I guess you have succeeded in you plans! WOOTZ!
If you dont mind, could you check out my writing?

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mayshing In reply to irishkisame007 [2010-03-19 21:05:32 +0000 UTC]

I suck at giving feedback to writings though. X_X
I think it's best you ask someone else for it. XO sorry.

My friend on the other hand is a damn good writer, perhaps she can help you?

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irishkisame007 In reply to mayshing [2010-03-22 04:04:21 +0000 UTC]

Perhaps, I will search her out with I get the time... something I find myself with less and less

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mayshing In reply to Themis13 [2010-03-19 01:44:21 +0000 UTC]

thanks. I know a lot of films will be looking good this year.

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Themis13 In reply to mayshing [2010-03-19 20:59:27 +0000 UTC]

awesome !!

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mayshing In reply to CinnaMonroe [2010-03-18 21:40:33 +0000 UTC]

yay!

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