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Published: 2004-12-02 05:10:18 +0000 UTC; Views: 378; Favourites: 0; Downloads: 3
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1God, she needed to get laid. The thought pounded in Jen’s head as she rested her feet on her desk. It’s been too long. Her work was finally done, the deal had been cemented, and her secretary was currently putting the finishing touches on it. Now I can get my life back.
Jen had been working on this deal for two months now, and it had taken up all of her time. Working late was something she was accustomed to. She worked hard; she received promotions. Fighting her way up the company ranks wasn’t easy, but she’d done it. She’d done it all the way to the vice presidency. Yeah, she thought, all I need to be completely happy is a life. No, she silently argued, I’m just going to have to find it wherever I left it last while I’m on this vacation. It’s for two weeks. Plenty of time for a new perspective, right? Sure, her other inner voice interrupted, so when you get back you can go straight back to late nights. Jen finally called a halt to the voices in her head. “Vacation starts tomorrow, guys,” she murmured to herself. “Can you keep it down up there until then?”
“You know,” a deep male voice called from the doorway. “Talking to one’s self is one of the first signals something is wrong. But talking to your multiple personalities is a whole other ballgame.”
Jen jumped, startled out of her wits as her head jerked up to find Phin McCullan in her doorway, a stack of documents in one hand, the other casually gripping the doorframe. “You scared the living daylights out of me. Here to drop off the rest of the documents?”
“No, I just thought you needed some really expensive paper for recycling,” he joked. “But while I’m thinking about it, it is my job to scare the living daylights out of people, so to speak. I hope I did a good job,” he smiled.
Sitting back, Jen considered his words. He was right. Phin McCullan was the financial advisor for the company that she had just closed the deal with. His job was to assess risks, and in the process of getting the information he needed, he more than often had to use intimidation. He didn’t scare her though. “Pretty good, but not one of your best. I heard about how you cleaned house over at Crayle & Associates’. And others, of course.”
His reputation was almost better than hers. He was known to all the corporations in the business as a man to be feared and respected. Phin McCullan stood at 6’2”, and cut a striking figure with broad shoulders, startling green eyes, and warm honey colored hair cut short but not to short, enough to leave a few stray hairs hanging over an eye. When it came to business, though, his eyes could burn a hole through someone, or so she had heard. But she had never witnessed it. Oh well, she thought, they might cross each other’s paths in business again. It was a small world after all.
Phin was a hard worker like herself. He had probably worked just as hard. “So what about you?” she arched her brow. “Are you planning any much needed vacation time?”
His gaze focused on her. Definitely forest green, her traitorous thoughts broke in. “As a matter of fact, I already have. Just a few weeks, though. Any longer and I’d go crazy.” He grinned lazily at her, in easy camaraderie, as he walked over and plopped the stack of documents on her desk, next to her own stack. “That about finishes it up.”
Sadly. Jen stood, readjusted her skirt, and stuck out her hand. “I guess this is it. It was great working with you.” He shook her hand firmly, and held it for a fraction of a second longer.
“May we both play as hard as we work.” He smiled fleetingly, and turned to go.
Jen watched him walk out. Well, actually, she watched his ass as he walked out. Hey, she could allow herself that. She was no longer on the clock. She had definitely forced pure business to mind whenever she thought of Phin McCullan. Business is business. Pleasure is pleasure. Before the deal had closed, Phin was filed under strictly business. And since he was a well known businessman, and she a businesswoman, he’d have to stay that way. Well, I can still check out his ass. She’d allow herself that. Pity, she thought.
Phin chuckled as he clicked the button on the elevator. Like he hadn’t felt her gaze on his ass as he walked away from her. She wasn’t obvious about it though, he could say that much for Jennifer Rowland. She put on a good front, and he admired her for that. Well, he admired a lot of things about her, but he dismissed those thoughts before he could get into trouble with them.
When he’d started working on this deal, both he and Jennifer’s reputations had preceded them. He’d heard good things. His secretary had filled him in on her deals, her promotions, and her business ethics. Jennifer was pure class when it came to business. She even looked the part. Taller than most women, but still a half a head shorter than him, Jennifer was the epitome of class. At work she had been calm and composed, cool, elegant, and efficient. She used her brains. And she could dress too. Jennifer always went for the business suit, flawless makeup, and a rolled chignon. “Phenomenal,” he muttered. He looked back before he stepped into the elevator. Her door was slightly open, he caught a glimpse of her at the window before the elevator doors shut.
He admitted to himself that she was a beautiful woman. Why deny it? High, elegant cheek bones, full lips, long, mahogany hair, pert nose, and dimples he’d only just discovered when she smiled at him just a few minutes ago. He’d never let himself think about it before, not with the stress he had gone through for this deal. Shows where your priorities lie, the voice in his head muttered. He’d noticed Jennifer, it was hard not to, but work came first, and she fell under the category of work. And, unfortunately, due to both of their reputations, she always would be. Forget about it, the voice said, you’re now officially on vacation. Go get laid, for chrissake.
By the time he had gotten in his car, it was past midnight. He glanced up towards her office window. The light was still on. Pity, he thought.
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Comments: 6
metacognition [2005-01-03 01:45:00 +0000 UTC]
trying not to hate lecco. trying. It's human nature to hate constructive criticism, right? Isn't it?
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Lecco [2004-12-02 12:51:13 +0000 UTC]
Interesting development. It definitely needs more to it, although I like it as an intro. And then, if you are going to use it as an introduction to a short story or however you plan to use it, I think it would be advantageous to subtly divulge a little more of the characters. A little more description of WHO they are, just to make the the story have a little more depth to it. I like the double usage of certain phrases for both Jen and Phil's thoughts. I like it, but it doesn't snag me. It's interesting, but not compelling enough (even though it's lighter fare) to make me want to read more. You need more levels. You have created a very nice but one dimensional sort of story that begs for a glimpse at the same story from a different direction.
I don't mean to by hyper-critical, but you wanted me to be honest. I hope you understood what I was saying.
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metacognition In reply to Lecco [2004-12-02 22:21:20 +0000 UTC]
thank you. I've decided to make it the first chapter of something. the characters will get more in depth as it goes, on, but I didn't want to begin the story with an indepth background. I didn't want to scare the reader away. Thanks for your input, I'll probably ask you for it again when I come up with another chapter.
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metacognition [2004-12-02 05:17:17 +0000 UTC]
I wonder if i should star the thoughts or something...think?
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metacognition [2004-12-02 05:12:15 +0000 UTC]
what's REALLY annoying is that I can't put italics on here. If it sounds weird in some places, it's because thoughts were in italics, but now they're in normal font. which now sux. damn.
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